I really wish I could control my stress response around friends and family visiting me at home. I just hate it so much. I wish people would leave me the hell alone!! No, I don't mean that..... its just I find it aggravates my anxiety to the max.

I feel the need for the house to be pristine and, since having E, there just isn't the time to do it all. I'm waiting for guests to arrive now and everywhere I look I can see bits on the carpet, smears, dust..... I'm convinced the house smells really bad...... Without fail, my stressing will result in DH and I having a huge row before the guests arrive.

Then there's the waiting. I hate waiting for them to arrive, trying to stop E messing up the place, flinching at every car door slamming. What will I even say to them? Ugh, why are they even coming?

Then, once they're here and the conversation starts, I'm okay.

I usually try to arrange to meet people out - for coffee, for dinner - but, especially around this time of year, people do insist on "popping in" with gifts and cards.

Anyone else? Or is it just me?