Unfortunately now that T goes to bed early (no later than 7:30) my husband doesn't see him sometimes at night. He gets really sad, but there's just no keeping the baby up past his bedtime - bad for all!
Does your SO see your baby every day?
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DH travels a couple days a week (still) so he doesn't see her everyday
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Baby isn't here yet but he'll see him every day. He gets home from work at around 4 so we're lucky in that he'll have time with LO once he gets home!
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Yes, about 99% of the time.
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Yep, everyday though some days less than others. He takes DS to daycare every morning so they see each other for at least an hour a day.
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Yes, bathtime is his "job" every night as soon as he gets home at 7:15/7:30. DD has an 8:30 bedtime so it works. He generally sees her in the morning too b/c she's started waking up at 7 while he's getting ready for work.
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Yup, every night. We have dinner together as a family and then he gives my son a bath and put him down for the night. We end up putting him to bed late because we wait for my husband to get home. But we agreed that we would sacrifice an hour of his sleep for family dinner/bonding time.
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Ugh I'm feeling really guilty that tonight is the 3rd night DH will miss him. The problem is that he has not been napping well and so I can't get him to stay up much past 7. I feel badly but what can I do?
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Yep! But my DH is off work everyday at 2pm.
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@winniebee: Today's the first day he couldn't interact with him. He had to leave earlier than normal for work, and our son went to bed half an hour ago so he won't get to see him awake (just the crib check-ins that we so often do).
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Usually, yes. There have been a few instances where he was gone for extended periods (deployment and a two week school). He's doing some training for work right now and will be gone for 3 weeks.
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Hopeuflly he will...we're planning on hopefully having DH get the baby in the morning and spent some time with him, since by the time he gets home (sometimes not til 7:30) LO might be sleeping...so hopefully the morning time will be his time with baby (and my time to sleep!). We'll see how it actually works out though.
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90% of the time (but the same is true of me). He get's the evening shift since I teach at night. So he is bedtime. Except on special nights (like tonight) when he is on travel or has to work late.
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Baby's not here yet, but I worry about this since DH typically doesn't get home from work till 9:30-10:00pm most nights. I have friends that their babies stay up till 9 or 10pm (and another that had a night owl that liked to sleep in the day) so IDK if our baby will be able to accommodate Daddy's schedule. He stays up late though, so I think if anything, he'd be up for one of the feedings.
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@winniebee: I feel like the baby's sleep is the most important thing so I agree with what you have chosen to do. DH is almost never home before DD's bedtime but she would not get enough sleep if we kept her up.
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Not always... If DH has an early morning at work - like he has class at 8:20 - then DS will SOMETIMES sleep past that. And DH works until 10pm 3x week so he never sees him at night.
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We're the opposite. I'm worried that (eventually, post-maternity leave, etc.) it will be me who won't always see the baby! I work longer (and stranger) hours than DH, and I take dinner with me to work about once a week because I have meetings until late. I'll have to figure out how to make my schedule work with a baby for sure!
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@Andrea: Unfortunately DH also leaves the house before T wakes up. Of course, tonight, DH did walk in the door when I was fighting him to sleep at 6:45 and took over....which I think had the worse effect of stimulating him so he's still not asleeep.........
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My husband works long hours in the summer; like for the past month he's been working 12-16 hour days, 6 days a week. On good nights, he gets home just in time to do the bedtime routine. On bad nights he might not get home until 10 and then he has to leave again at 5:30 the next morning. Every day, though, I take the kids to his work either at lunchtime or right after daycare so they can see him. He hates not seeing them at all during the day, and they go to bed very early, so it's the only way, sometimes.
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@winniebee: Can you take T down to his office on those days or Skype for a few minutes on your husband's lunch hour? Those hours are hard are on the whole family, I know.
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@winniebee: will that change once T starts daycare (he is going to daycare I think?)?
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We're very fortunate that his work schedule allows for him to spend 3-4 hours with them most days.
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@Honeybee: I think Skype would be a good idea! Unfortunately he works in a hospital so I can't really bring T to see him at work.
@Andrea: I think so....basically am hoping that once T starts sleeping thru the night he'll be getting up a little earlier (right now in his crib from 7/7:30-7/7:30 or so). Also, DH is on a particularly rough rotation right now where he has to get up super early.
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@winniebee: yeah it's tough. DH might only have 20 min a day with DD during the week but he tries to make up for it on the weekends. They spend a lot of alone time together and have a great relationship so don't worry!
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@Andrea: I know it will be fine - I just feel bad! Ah, the mom guilt...
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@winniebee: interesting. I've always viewed this as falling under dad guilt instead?
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No... He's not always home when they go to bed... And he's been sick for the past few days...
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Currently yes, but it depends on which rotation he is in. Sometimes he leaves before we get up and doesn't come home until way past LO's bed time. Really not a fan of those days!
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In the morning for just a few minutes. I know he wishes he could see him more
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So far yes. He hasn't been travelling lately. I will be sad the first time he has to travel now that Sawyer is here (before Sawyer was born I really loved the alone time). I have kept Sawyer up a bit later so DH could help put him to bed (I know, bad mommy)
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With us, if our LO goes to sleep as early as yours then no, he won't be able to see him that day-except on the baby monitor!
If baby is up in the morning then dh will see him before work. -
Not at night. Hubs leaves for work right about the time Mavi comes home from Daycare so apart from seeing him in the morning... that's about it. He sees Sienna more because she's home with me (for now) but once she starts daycare the same thing will happen.
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Yes, morning and night. My son is an early riser and my husband makes it home for bedtime almost everynight.
There have been some times where he hasn't seen him at all, like when we're traveling without him, but on those days we Skype. Maybe that's an option during the workday for some dads?
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Not always. He usually goes to get her in the mornings but if she sleeps in, he won't be able to see her since she's asleep by the time he comes home.
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Dh gets home from work at 430 and my lo's bath time is at 8, so he gets a good amount of time with her
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Most of the time... but a couple days a week, he doesn't get home until she's already in bed. He sneaks a peak at her through the monitor and complains about how much he misses her
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35 comments