This is our third kid, why does this still feel hard to figure out??

Our youngest is almost 3. And as she is a screamer mixed with the 3 year old behaviors, I’m hesitant to give her less sleep. But my gut is telling me maybe she’s done.

If she sleeps any amount beyond a quick car nap she is up until 10pm. I’ve tried waking her up at an hour, even less, let her sleep longer for the whole sleep begets sleep idea, same result. Also skipping some days. She is sleeping in more for summer (between 7-8am) so maybe that’s taking her nap needs? But as I SAH with all 3 kids right now I really really need that evening time.

However on the days I’ve let her skip naps, she is pretty much a wreck from 4pm on and it’s tough to keep her happy. We can’t realistically go outside at that time here because it’s an inferno and she burns easily.

Should I cut off naps and if so, any tips on surviving 4pm to bed? Is there another nap strategy to take? In 2 months we’ll be back on getting up at 6:30am and she’ll have part time preschool, but only one day is past lunch so we have flexibility.

Thanks for any tips or just commiseration