Lo's naming (Jewish ceremony where they get their Hebrew name) is this weekend. Her cousin in supposed to get named with her. Sounds great right? Well it would be if my bil didn't have such awful taste in girls! His ex wife is pretty awful to him and always have been. She's hurt him so much, is emotionally abusive, and killed his self esteem. So when we invited his lo to be named with my lo, we said her mom wasn't invited. We want it to be a special day, not having to worry if she'll freak out or be mean, and they're not married anymore so we feel like she doesn't need to be at our family events anymore.

Bil said yes and its all planned. She overheard her lo talking about it on the phone with her dad, and freaked out. She tested dh about it, and he was so upset with her that he said some mean things. He said the truth, that the consequences for treating bil like dirt is that we don't want to see her anymore.

And then she emailed our Rabbi. Seriously, the man who has nothing to do with anything that has to do with this or her. I am so pissed off and embarrassed. She told him how upset she is with us, and disappointed and hurt. She said its because dh doesn't want her there, and how wonderful she is at being a mom. Meanwhile her lo will tell us that all she does is sleep all day and leave her to play by herself. And she asked Rabbi to pray for us. Oy!

I don't know if my niece will be named now but I'm really hoping she is because I know shes looking forward to it and I think it will be so special for the cousins to be named together.

And after the long vent, my question. Were we in the wrong to not invite her?