I'm wondering if there's any "etiquette" when it comes to asking people for hand me downs (clothes, toys). Is it alright to ask or should you wait until they offer?
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I think it depends who it is. Family I think is OK to ask...I wouldn't really ask for stuff from my friends. They usually offer it up pretty quick. And i have asked to borrow stuff...ie can I borrow a maternity dress and that usually turns into, "oh i have a whole box of stuff I can let you wear for a bit"
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I ask if I can buy it (or borrow it), and then hope they say "oh don't worry about it, I was just going to give it away anyways" and then they give it to you. Or else you buy it for cheap. People are less likely to be offended if you offer money.
Beware about the borrowing though, I have friends I will no longer borrow from because they would expect you to replace the item at full cost if it wasn't in the same condition you lent it in. Too stressful.
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I only asked family and close friends and they never had a problem with it. I've received tons of hand me downs and am so grateful!
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I wouldn't ask, I'd wait for someone to offer, even family. You never know what their family plans are.
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I don't usually ask but I could see asking family. I know that BIL/SIL are done having kids and I think I remember seeing them with a Baby Bjorn bouncer so I have been contemplating asking if they still have it so I can try it out on DD #2.
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I don't mind asking, but I don't want to keep anything. I have been asked as well, and I certainly don't mind sharing, but I was shocked when I said I would want the stuff back and my friend didn't really want to give it all back. I just assumed when I lend out clothing or gear, it would come back. But, I guess I don't really need to hang on to it and the sentimental stuff I just kept.
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I've asked my sister for clothes and then she offered some gear as well. As far as friends, I don't ask unless they offer.
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I wait for people to offer.
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I haven't asked but I have been gifted SO MUCH stuff it's ridiculous. If a friend's child is wearing something I covet, I may do what @mrs. superhero does - ask to buy it from them when the child has outgrown it. I would ever borrow since my daughter is a spitter and makes a mess of a lot of clothes.
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we asked for a car seat base from our sister in law and thats about it. everything else we have has been given to us without us asking. I'm not the type to ask because I dont want them to feel obliged.
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I wouldn't ask.... even family. I don't want to give my clothes up to family because I'm not done having kids and when it comes to baby things, they're easily ruined, stained, and stretched out. I can't afford to buy all new things for my next one, and really I shouldn't have to.
My brother and SIL are having their first baby, and I felt awful, but I didn't offer any clothes. I was gifted a ton of clothes and offered hand me downs, and I figured they'd have the same. My plan was to offer to supplement things that they didn't get, like if they needed pants in a certain size or something. But luckily I was right, and they did get plenty of clothes so I'm off the hook!
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11 comments