Hellobee Boards

We use hand-me-downs of items that I wanted to try but wouldn't have spent money on--pack n play, bumbo, exersaucer, doorway jumper. I declined offers of a used crib, stroller and car seat because I wanted to pick out my own. I think you should do whatever makes you happy, just remember that if you can get something decent from a family member/friend, you'll have more money/store credit to spend down the line!

I don't think you're being a spoiled brat at all! Use what you want and send the rest back or donate it! Things change, products that didn't exist then do now, etc. Don't beat yourself up!

Agree that the play mat isn't something that is be super picky about as long as its in good condition. That said, I totally get wanting to pick your own stuff, especially for big ticket items. I feel like it's part of the nesting process for FTMs!

When my sister was pregnant with her first, I made a list (along with another sister and friend) of items I could lend to her. It was a big task to dig through and figure it out but not too much of a hassle since my LO had just turned one and still had a lot of stuff laying around. It helped her organize and determine what to add to her registry. Plus she could pick and choose from us -- whether to borrow a particular item from one sister or another. We let her borrow the items as she needed so that she didn't have a houseful of toys that her newborn couldn't use right away. This is the ideal situation, but most of the time it doesn't work out that way.

Since your hand me downs have been through two kids, it's more difficult to assess what you can and cannot use. Even in great condition, better products have come since then. Heck, even in the past two years since my LO was born a lot has changed. Go ahead and keep the play mat you chose. Don't sweat it.

I just sorted stuff out for my family's garage sale and found like 3 or 4 things they would've happily given me... and I bought full price.. if either of us had known they were there

Honestly, if I were you, I'd suck it up and return the play mat. Baby doesn't care (mine has been on several and is entertained equally by all of them). I don't think you're being a spoiled brat, and I totally get how choosing certain stuff is nesting, and fun, but there are several things I wish I hadn't bought or obsessed over now that LO is here Save the $!

I don't think you're being ungrateful. Part of having a baby is being able to pick out a few things. My DD played with her activity gym for a very long time. We introduced it almost immediately and had it up until she was crawling. I'd put a blanket on top of it and she'd crawl underneath and use it to help prop herself up. So for us, it was well worth the investment. I also loved the fact that I picked it out and wasn't an eyesore --- you will take tons of pictures with the baby on it in the beginning, so it should be something you like.

I would keep what you want as far as hand me downs and then use the rest as back ups somewhere else, or donate them. We got the bumbo, pack n play and lots of clothes used even though we bought some of it used ourselves. There were certain things we wanted new though, so there is nothing wrong with that!

Handmedowns are lovely and very thoughtful, I always really enjoy them. That being said, they require a lot of effort in editing and taking the extra to goodwill if you don't want your house overrun. Honestly, it would be far easier to just buy your own stuff. But it's nice to have thoughtful people in your life, and to save the money.

I just got done editing my daughter's clothing (21 months) down. I had fully 5 big boxes of too small clothing, plus a closet full of enough clothing for four kids. I got rid of about 70% of it, mostly to goodwill, some to a friend. It felt great! Handmedowns require a lot of vigilance and willingness to send things along. If you feel obligated to keep it all you'll be overrun quickly.

I kept what I liked and anything I didn't want (second hand)I gave away for free on the parenting boards. Sometimes its nice to have new things.

I have a hand me down relationship with my SIL. Since we have a smallish apartment without storage my SIL is giving us a few things at a time. I know she's really willing to share so when we set up our get togethers I usually say "We're going to start shopping for activity mats soon. What kind did you use for nephew?" Then I know what she has (and chances that I want it) before she digs it out of storage.

@PrincessBaby: literally us too.

I'm a brat. I didn't accept one used or donated item. I bought it all and was well researched. My mom on the other hand, accepted all my aunts' hand me downs and used items from coworkers and neighbors. Her house has everything my baby needs and more and all of it is handed down. m doesn't notice a difference. I am starting to think I should have done that too.
So, try to use as much of the used stuff as you can. At the same time, don't be embarrassed to say "no thank you!" And send it back!

You are not being a brat for wanting what yiu want for your child. Since you have options don't hesitate to exercise them. Re-gift or donate the items you don't want. Or let your Sis and SIL know you are not going to use them in case they would like to gift to someone else or donate them yourself. No biggie.

I would keep it all for now. You never know which one YOUR baby will like! Just because it is rated best XYZ doesn't mean your baby will like it! And it doesn't hurt to have extra for the ILs house or bring with you next time you visit your parents and keep it there.

And when the time comes whichever one LO does not like and you don't need? Just sell it on CL or a local FB resale group and use the proceeds to buy other stuff you will need.

I haven't read the other comments yet but, I think asking someone who is giving you stuff for free to make a list of all the things they have that they MAY give you is selfish. I would just accept it graciously and sell it if you don't want it. Or ask them what they want for it in return - if they want it back, you to give it away or do they care.

I would use pretty much everything used other than my carseat.

@Foodnerd81: having stuff at the grandparents is huge! We take very little with us to mom and dad's because they have so much baby stuff that was handed down!