I get sad knowing we're only having one. But I also know we're doing what's best for our family...in the long run....
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I have always wanted 4 kids. And DH is set that we are done now at 3. The past couple of weeks have been bittersweet. Watching LO start to smile and babble is amazing, but knowing I will never be in this stage again is really hard.
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I'm a sucker... I always want what I can't have. So even though I know we're done (and happiest!) at 2 kids, of course I think about getting pregnant again and having another baby. But ONLY because I know I don't want it and therefore can't have it!
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@mrs. wagon: this x2!
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We're pretty sure we're done with two, and I'm still coming to terms with it. I think we made the right decision (and we're leaving open the possibility of fostering in the future), but I think DH is a lot more at peace with our decision than I am, right now. I hope that, as time goes by, I will feel 100% done; right now I'm only like 98%.
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I'm actually stressing over the opposite. I love my daughter. I swear she's my best friend already. She brings me so much joy that I don't feel a strong need for another child. Plus pregnancy was very very rough for me. But I do feel strongly that I want her to have a sibling...
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@mrs. wagon: That is so true! I knew I would feel this way right now. When I was in labor I looked at DH and said "Some day I am going to forget how miserable I was with this pregnancy, I am going to forget how bad labor hurts, and I am going to miss having a litte baby- I will tell you I want another one. You will remind me of this exact moment when it happens.".
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Yes and no. We may consider one more if life is different in about 5 years or less. But then once LO is a toddler, I may totally change my tune and 100 percent be done with one. The wait and see aspect is what kills me.
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Yes. DS and DD were both surprises and sometimes I wonder if DH ever really wanted a baby with me. I know it's ridiculous but I wish he were more...crazy in love with the kids and I. He doesn't want a third right now because he says he is content.
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We're done after this one, and I don't feel sad at all about it. Maybe I will in a few months, but right now I don't enjoy being pregnant (I was over it by 20 weeks), and I feel satisfied with our family size after this one is born. We'd prefer to have the money and freedom to buy a house with plenty of land for animals and stuff, and I think just having the 2 kids to enjoy it is perfect.
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@mediagirl: I get sad that you are sad.
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@HLK208: I am so sorry you feel that way. Your DH sounds like my DH. Our third is the only one we planned and he would have been done at two. I know he loves the kids, but I think he would have been fine not having kids. He has never been one to really like the whole pregnancy thing and really struggles with the newborn stage. He is a great dad, but really hands off until they are older.
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I had no idea that having a baby would make me a baby person. I'm so complete and in love with DS. I knew I would love him but it's like I couldn't totally "get it" until I had him.
I'd have so many more if it were possible.. we waited so long to have him. -
Yes! But that's because I want a second and my husband says he's done. I'm trying not to push it but I'm very sad, especially because I'm in my middle 30's and I don't feel like time is on my side.
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I would have 4 kids, maybe even 5, while DH only wants 3 MAX.
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My husband is leaning towards us being done, which would be OK- two kids, one of each, makes sense. If we're done, though, I kind of feel like I got cheated a bit- only one pregnancy, which I loved, BTW, only one maternity leave where I'm totally focused on the kids... this might be a good thing, though. Only one time of sleepless nights! Granted, I kind of want to experience what things would be like with only one baby.
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A little. I'd honestly be fine with one but DH feels really strongly about having another, and I have these sad (albeit totally illogical, shed have friends) images if c all alone playing in her room, bored. I was an only til 6 and I was fine but I can't kick those stupid images out of my head!
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I will be okay if everything goes perfectly, but if we have trouble conceiving the second I will be upset, because I want them to be close together in age.
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I'm sad that we're having trouble conceiving dc2. My sis and I are 16mo apart and I wanted a sibling very close in age for DD. here we are at 25mo, not even one in the oven. We are pursuing treatment but will pursue adoption if it doesn't work for us. But I know in my heart we'll be parents again.
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@mediagirl: I feel exactly like you do. LO isn't even here yet, but I can tell I will probably *want* another one, but it isn't in the best interests of our family to have more than one. We wouldn't even be able to afford 2 in daycare for another 5 years, and by that time, I really don't think I'll want to expand my family and throw us into tight financial straights again. Like you, I know I'm doing what's best, but I still feel some guilt that LO won't have any siblings!
I just try to remember that she will already have 6 first cousins and like 10 second cousins (not even counting step-cousins, 2 of whom are being born within 2 months of her!) when she is born, all within a 3 hour drive, so she will not lack for company or playmates!!
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Totally! I really want more than one, but now more than ever, I realize that it's not meant to be for us and i really am okay with it, just sad about at the same time.
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I was sad when we decided to stop after 2, but then I remembered how miserable I was being pregnant and chasing after a toddler.
I'm happy with one of each and want to love them like crazy and do my best raising them.
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