I never have! I feel like everyone is SO nice and I see so many of these users as my friends.
However, I remember when I was on WB, SO many threads would get heated and people would say really mean things. I wonder what makes HB so different?
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We're a smaller community (wb used to be like that too)... And Mr bee has magic ways of making everyone play nice!
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I think HB is a MUCH smaller community and that has a lot to do with it. WB used to be like that when I joined but as the community expanded, so did the variety of personalities. When you throw together thousands of people, you're bound to get a few bad apples. We're also talking the difference between a personally-owned site and a corporate-owned one.
That being said, yes, I have seen comments here but not many.
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I have seen some comments, but not as many as WB, for sure.
I agree with the PPs - that it seems to be a smaller group of people, which makes it nice! it's also a focused website for parenting, ttc and pregnancy - whereas weddingbee is weddings..and then lots of other things. so naturally, with many many more people (with many different interests and reasons for being on WB in the first place) there's going to be the possibility of clashing strongly (such as ttc/pregnancy/parenting and 'CBC').
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Yeah, I think it has to do with the smaller community, too. WB used to be like that. Also, MrBee does a great job.
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Most snarking tends to come from just a few users, often using multiple accounts. Hellobee requires an application and/or an invite to join, so that makes it harder to create multiple fake accounts and troll. Plus we've built a lot more anti-troll software over the past year!
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I hope HB stays small like this then! I love it!
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Sometimes also people get misunderstood. I know I'm kind of... odd, and occasionally things that I mean to say in a nice way get misinterpreted in a mean way.
But yes, hellobee is awesome and people are nice here.
I think also it's easier to be a bridezilla or groomzilla than a momzilla or dadzilla... -
It's all warm and fuzzies over here, and I LOVE that
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I think I've seen a couple of borderline snarky comments but not much! I love that about HB.
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I have. I remember someone a while back that was pretty rude..... but she hasn't been on in months.
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I can't think of many, if any Certainly people disagree about issues, but I love that people seem to keep their disagreements respectful. Since parenting involves so many very personal, important decisions, I think everyone tries to be extra careful in how they express their differences of opinion.
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I've only seen a few ... And just one directed at me that was enough to make my blood boil. Love our community!
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@artbee: Im wondering if we're thinking of the same person! The one I'm thinking has been on more recently, though, I thought. I don't know.
@Mrs. Yoyo: that is exactly it! Even the circumcision thread stayed relatively calm but someone said something [diff thread] in a way that I felt like they were saying it "to" me, and it bothered me.
I've never flagged anyone here, though, which is good!!
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I have seen a couple snarky comments on blog posts. I remember one thread getting kinda nasty a while back, but the user hasn't been on in a long time. I love this community because we have different opinions on things but seem to be able to express that in a nice way.
I have also seen snarky comments about HB on another site.
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@sorrycharlie: uh oh.... maybe she is still on and I don't know it. I've been pretty busy so I haven't been that active lately.
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A couple, but not many. It's nice to not see them.
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I remember some crazy snarky comments really early in the Hellobee beginnings. They were from an old WB poster that had gotten kicked off from there. I haven't seen her or any snark since.
I'm so impressed with the bunch of ladies here. There is always a high level of respect even when discussing controversial subjects. -
If I see them I just skip over them, roll my eyes and look for the next post because I won't let a bad seed make HB a bad experience. I have also seen other people stick up for me so I let their comments stand. That is what I feel makes this a great place to be.
I love these warm fuzzys (and I hope I'm not the one everyone thinks is snarky).
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I hope thins stay like this. I also wonder if everyone on here is a bit more mature in general.
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I've a few borderline, but I have a feeling that it wasn't meant in the way it was taken, either. I also think it has something to do with being a privately owned site. Weddingbee seems to have gotten far worse since it was sold.
Also, I think I accidentally flagged someone, when I was trying to hit the reply button. Oops and sorry about that.
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@Grace: I was very involved with Weddingbee's boards for a long period of time after the sale!
Not sure what you mean by worse, but whatever it was... if you noticed it right after the sale, then I take full responsibility.
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I think over on WB the long-term members can be a little territorial and almost cliquey so maybe because HB is so new people haven't developed those tendencies yet?
I remember that the last couple of times the drama blew upover on WB it was usually well known posters involved.
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I agree that any disagreements/difference of opinions have been stated respectfully. I've seen a few blah comments, but I think we have a different mentality/maturity level then when we were all planning our weddings. Focus from us is now our LOs. The small community we have here is also a huge reason why. We're like a small close knit (online) family!
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That is something that I love about this online community! I feel like I can bring up topics and respond in an honest and genuine way to others without having to worry about someone judging me.
It also seems to me (and this is probably going to come off as sounding snobby) that the contributors here have a lot of intelligent things to say, something that is not found everywhere else. I assume that with this level of insight comes an additional level of maturity and respect, and that is something I appreciate when sharing my thoughts/concerns/questions/excitement with a group of "virtual" friends!
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Very very very few. I love all you Hellobee-ers. I don't know why but I just feel so connected to you all so immediately. Probably because we all have such a huge thing in common-- kids, pregnancy, or future family plans. Plus of course Mr. and Mrs. Bee do such a great job keeping things kosher around here!
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I think the fact that hellobee is more about parenting, pregnancy and babies kind of helps. Wedding planning is stressful in a different way from parenting and maybe that adds to the snarkyness on WB. Because the knot is also about weddings and is SUPER snarky.
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While TTC, I spent a ton of time on baby boards at other sites (before my HB discovery), and there was SO MUCH snark. Grateful that the overall tone is much more supportive around here.
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No internet trolls here! We even fairly successfully discussed gay marriage without it getting too heated. Maybe HB should solve the world's problems, haha
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I think the difference between WB and HB though is the age group/maturity level. I think that on WB people on that website are generally in a different life stage. Planning a wedding is very "Me-centered" where as here on HB it's all about starting families which is the opposite of being selfish! I really think maturity has everything to do with it!
I love it here!
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@mrbee I wondered why an invite was required to join! I'll take that extra step to join if it helps keep negative energy out.
I think it's great how open-minded everyone is here. When everyone has a different opinion about child-rearing, parenting, etc, it's nice that this community shares opinions but everyone keeps the mentality that what each individual does is their personal choice and they must do what's best for them.
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I feel like I saw a few comments on blog posts. Other than that I haven't encountered any snarky comments. I love how respectful and nice everyone is here. I feel so welcome and not afraid to start threads.
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Hey guys... thanks for all the thoughtful comments about Hellobee!
I mentioned this on another thread, but do you guys think we could avoid getting too specific about other sites here on our boards? I'd hate for another site to interpret it as us calling their users as less than mature...
Thanks!
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I've seen a couple of comments here, but very few. This community is so small and harder to get into, so I think that's why it seems more peaceful and friendly. I also think it has a lot to do with people making a constant and conscious effort to maintain a certain attitude around a website. Unfortunately, as sites get larger and people don't continue to maintain that effort a few bad apples can spoil the bunch. That, and sometimes people really live off negativity and drama.
The other thing is that the bee family has some magic way of reminding people to play nice and people usually listen.
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I've seen a very limited few, sometimes I don't think the person intended it to come across that way, others were newer and I don't think they realized that's not what we do here
It's been a month or two though since I've seen one pop up.
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i think it's cuz many of us are parents? or wanting to get pregnant?
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@Ms.SK: I think that is key, just let the few bad comments/posts just go away rather than keep discussing them to death (OMG don't bring up the "beat a dead horse" thing again).
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I think because on here everyone is looking into TTC, already pregnant, or a mother so they're more mature and aren't under *as* much pressure as they think planning a wedding was, because being a mom is more of a challenge than planning a wedding. I left the other site to come here because of the snarky-ness, as well of lack of activity in TTC threads.
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I was never a message board person before Hellobee (I was apparently living in a cave) but I have since visited a few other parenting sites with message boards and WOW. I have been completely spoiled by HB. Everyone is so thoughtful, smart, and respectful here.
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@mrbee: Got it! Thanks for mentioning that... didn't even think of it!
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42 comments