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We put in a lot of effort to limit LO's whining...she's almost 16 months and I know we have a long road ahead of us, but this is what works for us at the moment...

I have written about it before, but my LO knows I mean it when I say "[her name], no thank you"...so when she gets super whiny, I use my "mom voice" and tell her "[her name], no thank you, please stop whining and tell mama what you want." That stops the whining for the moment and she will point to what she wants and I say to her "you want your cup? say cup please"...and we do this all the time (yes, it gets tiring and exhausting, but so far it works. I feel super lucky that LO is a pretty good talker (really started saying a lot around 13-14 months) so she is pretty good at using her words.

So now she says "please" all the time bc she knows she gets stuff (she walks around during story time at the library and if she sees someone with a snack she will go up to them and say "please" in her little voice).

So, basically I do not tolerate whining and try to find out what she wants and when I do, I tell her what she needs to say to me in the simplest way possible and we just do that over and over and over...and she catches on so quick. Yes, sometimes she sounds like a crazy child saying "cup, cup, cup PLEASE" or "cheese, cheese, cheese, PLEASE!!!" but it's way better than the whining noise.

I guess bc she was caught on with talking pretty quick, we didn't do a lot of signs. She does sign "all done" and "more" which is super helpful...we just started early on when it seemed like she had no idea what was going on (we started around 6-7 months when she started out in her high chair)...and sure enough she started signing "all done" when we get her out of her highchair...and now she does it when she's done with her meal, done playing with something, and even when she's done for the day and ready for bed.

I have no idea what I'm doing, but so far, I feel like LO is very well behaved. My advice is to start out as early as possible and be super consistent (almost to the point of being OCD)...they are smarter than we give them credit for sometimes...my husband is way stricter than I am and it shocks me the things that she can do/say when he's around

The past month we have been working on sharing. There have been times where LO wants a toy and will grab it from another child, and I will stop her and tell her to "share"...and the first few times she got very upset and cried...but I was firm that she needs to learn to share and she cannot grab toys from other kids. But it's ok that she got upset and cried a little...and we try not to redirect immediately bc she's definitely able to somewhat process what is going on...and sure enough, after 2-3 times of getting upset, now she hears me tell her we need to share and she hands toys over to other kids. I know what works for my LO won't necessarily work for others, but who knows, maybe give it a try and see what happens

@Mrs. Pen: My plan is to model the best I can, and use positive reinforcement. He's still very little so he may just be getting frustrated? Sounds like you're doing all I would, and a great job! Hope he gets better at it soon.

I try to remain consistent no matter what. I just let my LO throw a full on fit if that's what it takes to get him to a place where he will say please or something like that. He will sometimes pout or cry, but when he snaps out of it he's much nicer and more agreeable. It's painful, but I try really hard to not give into the whining. Right now, for example, he's in the bath and asks DH to, "Open it!" and DH reminds him to say please. We do that for all of his requests and almost always he says please without a fight. Consistency is key.

I was just very repetitive when DS was Cobi's age. I didn't sign though (I do with DD now). By 20 months he had please and thank you down and the whinning had stopped...for a little while. I think manners are so important so I try to be a good example. By 3, he finally got down "May I please have ____" so it takes time but he will get there. Like pp's have said, just be consistent

@googly-eyes: totally agree! Our pediatrician's handout at her 15 months check up had a section about sharing and how they are too young to understand completely so try to have toys that are multiples if possible during play dates (blocks, etc). At this age, she is mostly learning that she can't grab stuff and that it's fun to hand things to others. It's pretty cute b/c we went to brunch with another mom and baby and they were passing their food back and forth saying "share"...it's like a game to them

Commenting so I remember to come back to this one!

We say please before giving DS whatever it is he wants and thank you when we actually give it to him, but he still whines and grunts for whatever it is. It's so frustrating!