If you bedshare with your baby, do you just all go to bed at the same time? Did you move your own bedtime up to match baby's? By how much?
We've been bedsharing with LO almost exclusively because he just sleeps better that way but now that he's 4 months I'm getting the feeling he should have a bedtime earlier than ours, which is usually 11p or midnight. Yes, we've been keeping our baby up that late. Yes, I know Weissbluth would have us executed.
pear / 1799 posts
At first, she stayed up til around 10 or 11, so it worked. Then, as her bedtime got earlier, my husband built a co-sleeper, which was more like a bed extension, with a rail. We'd put her down, in her swaddle, and we'd go back out and watch TV or do whatever til bed. Once she was rolling over, we started bedtime in a pack and play, and when she woke to eat, we'd bring her in the bed with us. I was too afraid to have a mobile baby on our bed. Even with rails, she could turn and scoot off the end. I like her in a pack and play until she wakes, then we still get cuddle time. Plus, her earlier bed time means that my partner and I get our own time.
eggplant / 11824 posts
We’ve coslept with LO since she was a few weeks old, and we’ve always put her down before our bedtime (several hours). She goes to sleep in the middle of the bed, with pillows around her so she can’t roll/fall off and I keep an eye on her in the monitor and keep the volume up so I can hear her if she wakes up. Our LO has an extremely cautious personality, so she’s never tried crawling/getting off the bed by herself and she doesn’t really move around much in her sleep so it’s a secure set-up for her.
If I’m super tired or sick I’ll go to bed at the same time as LO and it never really works; she’ll want to stay awake longer and play with me, whereas she is used to being put down and just going to sleep.
Our bedtime routine is books, song and bed. Sometimes we do it in the rocking chair and sometimes I'll lay next to her in bed and read her her stories and then say goodnight and leave. Our bedtime is around 11 or midnight too!
honeydew / 7589 posts
She goes to bed with us, at 10 or 11. Then she sleeps until 10 or 11AM. 
I'm not a morning person so it's nice to have a little quiet when I'm first up. I also like that we can go out for dinner at night and she's happy as a clam. No bedtime meltdowns at 7.
It works for us. She's been going to bed with us for 18 months and she still gets plenty of sleep so, yay!
pomegranate / 3779 posts
We put LO down in a cosleeper until about 5 months. Now we put her down in her crib until she wakes for the first time and then we bring her into our bed for the rest of the night.
wonderful pear / 26210 posts
Haha, I have high sleep needs, so I go to bed when my son does. My husband is usually up an hour later, but we're all asleep by 9:30 the latest. Our day begins early.
grapefruit / 4291 posts
@anandam: will your LO go down in a cot or the like for the first part of the night? Or could you try a floor bed and then sneaking away once your LO is asleep?
pomegranate / 3231 posts
We don't usually cosleep -- it hurts my back plus I sleep terribly -- but recently I decided to cosleep for a few nights to help boost my supply. In that case, I just followed our usual bedtime routine and put him down in the crib. Then, when I was ready to go to bed I retrieved the baby and brought him into my bed.
pomegranate / 3565 posts
DS1 only falls asleep with either my mom or I laying with him. When he was younger, I cuddled with him and once he fell asleep, I snuck away. I'd surround him with pillows and he rarely moves when he first falls asleep. His bedtime was around 8ish and I'd go to sleep around 10ish. Now he's 2 and fights sleep hard. He typically stays up late enough where we go to bed at the same time (9-10).
persimmon / 1363 posts
I just put her to sleep in our bed when it was her bedtime, and then we went to bed later. When she got more mobile I put our bed on a really low bedframe and got railings.
pomegranate / 3845 posts
We went to bed with him and just watched tv or whatever in the bedroom while he slept. It was usually like I would nurse him to sleep at 8, DH would come in around 8:30 and watch tv and I'd go wash pump parts and prep bottles and get ready for the next day and finish any chores DH hadn't finished and then go back and join LO and DH, watch some tv and go to sleep.
cantaloupe / 6017 posts
When it worked for us, we put her in and left her in there alone. That stopped working, and I ended up having to go to bed at 7:00 (that was the natural time she was falling asleep for the night) and just read or watch t.v. on my ipad while she slept next to me. It was one of the biggest reasons we ended up sleep training her to sleep in the crib in our room for the first half of the night (we did this at about 6 months using the sleep lady shuffle).
I couldn't do the late bedtime/late wake up thing- for one, we often went to activities in the morning, and two, I would never see my husband alone.
coffee bean / 42 posts
I bed shared until about 13 weeks. For the first couple of months, baby went to bed when we did around 11p and it worked out fine. When he got a bit older, he started to get tired much earlier and crankier, so I had to start going to bed with him around 8p. He nursed to sleep and I rarely could sneak away. He would usually wake up!
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