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We are transitioning to the preschool room, and we have some tear-filled mornings, even though my LO goes FT and has gone to the same school since she was 13 weeks old! So, hugs. It sucks.

What has helped my LO – for both the preschool transition, and the transition from the infant room to toddler room, has been to have her develop a relationship with 1 teacher who is primarily there at drop-off, and to give her a specific “thing” to do. For my LO, she *loves* watering the plants in the class room. So every morning, she is greeted by the same teacher (as often as possible), who asks LO if she can help the teacher water all the plants. That is generally enough of a distraction for me to leave without tears.

I agree with your sister too about a quick getaway. I’ve never had prolonging my leaving, or trying to talk to LO, be especially useful. She will always want “1 more” hug, “a few more minutes” etc.

Also, (this was HUGE for our transition to the toddler room), does your LO like Daniel Tiger? If so, there is an episode about how grownups always come back. I would repeat that to LO during drop-off, and remind her that I always come back and pick-up, and we watched the episode several times a week. That really helped!

LO had a rough time when she started in September twice a week for a few weeks. She was always fine once I left though so her teachers would just take her. In January they changed to drop off at the door to encourage independence and it was like starting over. She still has a rough time but she has a favorite teacher and friends so after a few minutes of hugs, she's usually ready to go in. I think it just takes time but I do agree, definitely don't linger. When it's time for me to go, I tell her I love her and say I'll be back later then I leave.

Yeah, I agree you have to drop off and go.

eta: I almost forgot...one thing that was suggested to me by a more experienced mom that had this same issue was to give my son a task to complete when he got to the facility, like give the director a sticker. It made him focus on the task, not the fact that he was being left there.

I teach preschool and my advice is talk, talk, talk about it so she can start processing her emotions and develop coping skills. Talk confidently and positively about the routine before hand ("Today is a school day! What would you like to do at school today? Remember, I will do XYZ Routine and then I will leave, but I'll be back at X time.") Then follow your routine, which she can help create, but make sure it is short & happy. Some families do a special good-bye rhyme, count the number of hugs, set a timer on their phone, or do a quick activity together like hanging up jackets or choosing an activity. Let the teacher know if you need her to be part of the routine (I have kids who need me to gently take them from their parents and hold them for a few minutes, I have others who always do a special task with me, I have one that I take to look at our posted schedule to see the picture of when his mom will return). Also, I know it's really hard - it's hard for me when my son does it - but it helps to be positive and calm about your good-bye even when she cries.

Acknowledge her feelings, too, and let her know it's okay to be sad and miss you during the day but that she is in a safe place and can handle her emotions. With time, she can start to work out how to miss you, but still find something good to do at drop off. Unless she is crying literally all day long for weeks on end, she likely really is okay.

I think not making a big deal is key. Hug and kiss, say goodbye I love you I'll see you soon have fun and go! I do linger out of sight when DD cries just for my own benefit
To see for myself that the tears stop within 60 seconds.

Oh and even though my daughter is only 12 months, I talk to her and acknowledge her feelings. So, if she's in a clingy cry at drop off phase in the car I tell her where we are goin and its okay to be sad and miss me because I miss her during the day but ill be back at the end of the day and we will play!

Filing this away for later..... No advice OP as I'm not there yet but I have a feeling we will be in the same situation when DD1 starts preschool three mornings per week in the fall. She's such a momma's girl and has never been away from me, so I don't know who it is going to be rougher for, her or me! Sigh....I don't want my baby to start preschool at only three years old, I want her to have another year home with me, but alas, kids start school here at three.

Just reviving this thread since its fall, new preschools, and I can't be the only mama going through this right now My oldest DS just started a new preschool, he has gone to preschool for the past two years 2 days a week but now at age 3 he is in full time preschool. We started last week (3 days last week for transition, full time 5 days this week) and I didn't think it would be a problem at all but he has been crying every day. He clings to my leg every morning when I drop off. He has never done anything like that before! He starts getting whiny and fussy first thing in the morning on school days. We have tried to do everything mentioned here - talk about it and validate his feelings, quick hug and out the door, focus on the games that kids are playing when he arrives, and its still hard. I hope it will get better and he always has good days and even tells us he had a fun day and he's glad he went when we pick him up. Just looking for commiseration.

@shellio: the Montessori director gave some tips to parents who were sending their kids to school for the first time. She suggested being consistent with the pickup times. Draw a picture of the time you will be picking him up and that will be the time you will be there. Another thing that worked was when I told DD about something special we will do after I pick her up, whether it's a tv show she will get to watch, or a special dinner we are going to have. I also think it's good to keep the goodbyes brief.

I think he just needs time to adjust and will get there eventually! I know it is hard on the parent when they cry!