Ds is 23 months. Not sure he quite gets what time outs mean. Haven't tried really enforcing yet and looking for tips on how to if the need arises.
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We've given her warnings, which I:m sure she doesn't hear. that being said, when she hits us or other similar things, we pick her up, and put her in her crib for 2 minutes.
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For about 5 or 6 months, I did quick time-outs, where I just picked him up, walked to another room, set him down, and walk away. He could come right back to me, but it gave him a clear signal that I didn't like it.
Just now, at 23 months, we're doing legit time-outs. It only took him a day to get the message (two time-outs). Now, there's a warning, then he goes to a wall and sits down. He screams, but he gets it. When I go back (usually less than 30-45 seconds later, but when he's clearly sat still), I tell him what I didn't like and ask him to say sorry. Then hugs and kisses and move on.
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We do them very rarely now...mostly b/c she's hitting now. So she'll hit DH and he'll grab her hands and say "no hitting. Hands are for touching" and then E will rear back to slap again, and he will pick her up, put her in her room, close the door (we don't do the crib b/c we don't want bad associations) and he sits outside the door while she cries for 1 min. I sort of don't know how else to stop the behavior.
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I started around 20 months. DD doesn't really understand what it is but they really help her adjust her behavior. I started by telling her no, then tell her if she isnt going to listen then she will get a time out and then the 3rd time is timeout. I put her in a chair facing the wall for no more than 30 seconds to a minute and make sure she isnt playing with anything. To release her from timeout I get down to her level and tell her what she did wrong and the correct "choice" in that situation. And then ask her to apologize by giving a hug. It helps calm her actions and helps her mind redirect to something else.
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I started really early, around 13 months. I would give three warnings and after that, take him to the corner in the hallway and either make him sit or stand facing the corner. After about 30 seconds I would give him a hug and explain why he was in the corner. By about 15 months he would go to the corner by himself when I told him he had to. Even now at almost 4 we still use this and I always explain why he had to go to the corner when the time is up.
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We just put her in the corner when after warnings she does something again. I stand right there for a mintute to make sure she sits the whole time. Then we talk to her about why she is in timeout, give her a hug, and let her get up.
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Xander's 20 months and we do timeouts. Usually I'll warn him that if he doesn't stop doing whatever, he's going in a timeout. Then I hold him on my lap and count to 60 (we do 1 minute timeouts at the moment).
After the timeout is over, I repeat why he was in the timeout and then we hug.
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We just started it--one day he kept pushing his chair back from the table, which could have fallen over, so I said one more time and you're getting a time out. He did it again, and I picked him up brought him to a corner, sat with him facing the wall and had no eye contact or interaction with him for 1 minute. After I said "You had a time out because you kept pushing your chair back. That's dangerous and we don't do that", and I told him I loved him. And that was it!
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We started around 2. I give him 3 warnings before a timeout. However, major behavioral issues such as biting, hitting and kicking the dog are insta-timeouts. We rarely do timeouts anymore since he has broken his bad habits and takes the 3 warnings serious.
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Timeouts are done in his room and it's a minute for each year. So he's 2 so timeouts are 2 minutes. After timeout is over we talk about why he got a timeout and what the correct behavior is and that I love him but he needs to control his temper and use his words.
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We started a few months ago and have a "timeout rug" near our front door (really its our welcome mat). We'd give a warning and then if she didn't calm down / listen we'd go sit with her on the rug for a minute or so. Now that she's used to it she sits by herself.
At first she would cry and scream the entire time we sat there, but the past few weeks she has actually been asking to go sit on the timeout rug when she reaches a certain crazy/frustration point - she'll sit there and a few minutes later say "Ok I'm ready" and then be fine. I think daycare must deal with discipline like this because we definitely weren't expecting her to voluntarily go to timeout to calm down!
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We have been doing them for a while and I think they work. You can't use them too often, only for serious offenses. We have LO sit on the stairs and not be able to see me or DH. And we tell him he's getting a timeout and why, leave him for about a minute or so, then come back to reinforce why he was in the timeout, then we hug and kiss and get back to playing.
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like PPs, we've used them for serious offenses like hitting, biting, general unsafe behavior. i did the crib at first, but realized that she wasn't getting it. now i have her sit in the hallway for a minute (she's 21 months) and make sure she stays down. then i reiterate why she was there, have her say sorry (not that she gets it yet) and a hug.
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13 comments