I am one of those people who tends to get along with just about everyone. This comes from a combination of being raised in a family who didn't sweat the small stuff and taught me to be accepting of others differences. I'm not saying I love everyone I have ever met or that everyone loves me but generally I can coexist peacefully with just about anyone. So I have to say it baffles me that some of the people that are most important to DH are the ones that I have the most difficulty with. It just got me thinking why are relationships with people like MIL's and SO's best friends sometimes the most difficult? MIL has been taking care of LO for the last few months and I have to say after a couple months of dealing with her every day I have just about worn out my good will. It just doesn't make much sense to me. Given that DH and I are so similar and good for each other you would think these relationships would just be easy. What gives?
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I get along ok with DH's friends, but most of them are single and still into the bar scene (and we're not anymore) so we don't hang out too often.
His parents are another story though... let's just say I'm glad we live in different states now, b/c I can't handle too much of my MIL. Not sure how it is with your MIL, but with mine I always feel like she resents me a little, or thinks of me as an intruder on their family.
On the other hand, DH loves my family and gets along with them great- I sometimes joke that my mom loves him more than me
It does make me sad that I don't have that same sort of relationship with his mom/family.
Sorry I don't have any answers for you, but you're definitely not alone! -
I'm not super close with anyone from his side (friends/family), I would say we def all get along though! I don't spend enough time even with his family though to REALLY know how we would get along!
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Well in terms of family I think that makes sense. Love makes up for a lot, like incompatible personalities. And despite what I think most people would like to believe, there is nothing that says falling in love with your SO = falling in love with his family. So even though your SO may get along with his mom, that doesn't mean you (without all that emotional attachment in both directions) will.
Personally I think I get along well enough with everyone in my DH's life. I have no issue with any of this friends or his mom. I struggle a little with his dad/dad's family but so does he.
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I get along amazingly well with dhs fam and friends. They are all awesome people. Thank goodness! !
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DH's younger sister is one of my best friends. I get along well with most of his friends and consider them my own friends. My inlaws are a whole different story. I cannot stand my wretched, manipulating MIL.
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Most of them, fine. MIL and SILs - meh.
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Love all my husbands friends. They're all really nice and normal. His parents are pretty great too, so I don't really have any complaints in either category. I think in law relationships can be hard but I honestly think if there's an issue, probably 50% of the time it's caused by the person who married in and 50% of the time it's caused by the family... I guess I mean, it's not always the in laws fault. I read some threads online where the daughter in law (the person posting) seems to get offended and upset very easily and it makes me wonder how is deal if I were her SIL or something. But if course, some families are totally dysfunctional, too.
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I love all of DH's friends, I consider them my friends and we hang out with/talk to them much more than my friends because they have kids. I also love most of DH's family, with the exception of my MIL. The things that bug me about his family, also bug him so we're pretty much on the same page....
ETA: I think adding caregiver into the mix makes it much more difficult for you. No matter how much I like any one of DH's friends or family members, my expectations as a care giver for R are much more than any other relationship and I am sure it would definitely put a strain on an otherwise healthy relationship.
It does make me sad that I don't have that same sort of relationship with his mom/family.
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