Hellobee Boards

@winniebee: I agree it's super important to learn to swim since you have a pool. I just don't think the method is important. If he can learn in a mommy and me class then the goal is accomplished. 4 is still young, though to me. I'm mostly responding as someone who was forced to swim when she didn't want to and wasn't comfortable in the class and I have always hated the water. I learned to swim enough to save myself, but never really enjoyed it and still don't as an adult.

@winniebee: I totally understand pushing this. We did a parent and tot class last fall with the idea being she would go in with daddy (I was very very pregnant at the time, she was 2). She just cried and cried through the first three lessons (out of 6). Finally I started getting in instead of DH and it was better but she didn't love it. Anything else I may have called it quits but it was important that she get comfortable with the water. Not sure when we will do lessons without a parent.

I think I would leave him with the instructor. My daughter had the same type of issues when we first started lessons (but this was 2 years ago) and the instructor suggested I sit on the other side of the pool where I can watch but not be involved.

Granted, my son is only 20-ish months, but we tried a group class....even with me getting in...and he screamed the whole time. It was really stimulating with all of the simultaneous classes and splashing and screaming. He just didn't like it. We tried 3 classes and it was miserable. I hated wasting money but we switched to a private lesson in our apartment's pool and he never cried once. I think that a group environment in a pool can just be overwhelming. But I get the whole idea of not wanting to spend extra when it's included! Maybe after a couple more lessons, resign and do personal lessons since it is a safety issue.

Also, I would agree that maybe it would help if you weren't there. My son often throws a fit when I'm around and won't want to leave me. He does much better in church drop off than he does in a mommy and me class. Not sure if it's the age he is or if that is pretty consistent throughout childhood.

@winniebee: if this were me (and only because the lessons are free with membership), I'd wait it out until he was ready. I would take him to every lesson & stay in an area where he could see me, but not interact with him. Like, "I'm going to watch from over here until the lesson is over. You may sit and watch the class from the deck or get in and try, it's your choice." If he didn't want to get in, I wouldn't push it beyond insisting he stay for the whole class and pay attention to what the kids were doing. Then I'd try things with him in our own pool. Id hope that eventually he'd be comfortable enough to get in on his own. I'd worry about a negative association, too, if I forced it.

This happened to us. My daughter loves the water but refused to get in for her lesson. We used rewards and it worked. She got a small reward for the first three lessons, after that she picked a snack from the snack bar. By the second month she wasn't asking for anything. She was also able to articulate what scared her about the lesson. She's more clingy with me, so my husband went with her to the second lesson and that worked well

There was a child at my son's class that refused to get in the pool for five weeks straight. His mom and dad would try and convince him and he wanted nothing to do with it. He would walk around the pool and play with the toys but he never got in. Finally, they tried pulling him into the pool and mom and dad left. The child cried for fifteen minutes but eventually calmed down somewhat. He cried again at the end of class when his parents came back to pick him up. Not sure if that's a route you're willing to try.

@winniebee: yeah! That's great to hear!

@winniebee: That's great! Never underestimate the power of a good bribe