I am at a loss with what to do with DD. We tried potty training her last August when she turned two, and it didn’t work, for many reasons. So we backed off and a few weeks ago decided to try again.

In some ways she was doing great, but in other ways she’s a lot harder than DS was. Most importantly, I haven’t yet figured out how to get her to ore on command. With DS it took him FOREVER to self initiate, but we could tell him to pee at regular intervals and he would, and he’d stay dry in between.

With DD there’s been no success telling her it’s time to potty. On the other hand, she had been really good about tell me that she had to go, or she would say she was wet and she either wasn’t (but needed to go) or had a drop on her pants. For a while when she came home from daycare we’d take off her pull-up and keep her commando and she’d pee once without an accident (or again have a tiny drop).

But the problem is daycare. They were requiring pull-ups and she refuses to go at school. So I got her some training underwear that has more padding for absorption and a PUL layer for waterproofing. I was thinking she’d start doing the same thing as she does at home - realizing she’s a tiny bit wet and tell her teachers. Instead she’s just learned to pee her pants with no remorse.

This morning she was super grumpy and I figured she needed to pee but I didn’t push it and she had a small accident after breakfast and refused to use the potty. And I couldn’t force the issue because DH needed to drop them off and get to work. I told DD she needed to keep her undies dry and asked if she needed a diaper. She said yes. and was perfectly happy to put on a pull-up (all that we had close by).

So I just don’t know what to do. I feel like she’s regressing with everything we do, not getting better. I feel like the only thing that would help is for me to take a week off of work and keep her home and potty train her, but that’s just not possible right now. The best I could do is a long weekend in May, which also our anniversary. Great way to spend an anniversary, huh?

Does anyone have any advice? I just don’t know what to do. She’s not super motivated by anything in particular. And I feel like all she learns at daycare is to pee her pants. I’m at a loss .