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We honestly couldn’t afford it either, at least not right now. Maybe in a few years after a lot of really hardcore saving but if we had found ourselves in this situation (and I was convinced at a few points that I’d never be able to carry to term and we’d be looking into adopting) we would’ve stepped back for now. We probably would’ve waited at least 5 years, progressed in our careers and had saved up the money. So I guess eventually we’d make it so that we could afford it but we wouldn’t be able to even look into it right away.

My parents would help out. They did with my sil. I couldn't afford it by myself. I don't think you should get judged for it, if you saved the money by not having ivf you'd have plenty of money for kids!

I don't think we could but we want children of our own bad enough we would have made it happen some how some way.

My husband and I could afford IVF. But idk how many rounds we would be willing to do. As far as adoption, I'm not sure. Well I don't think we could afford international. Domestic maybe. I think domestic is cheaper. Maybe I'm wrong.

We have actually been saving money in case we need to do fertility treatments or adopt. If my husband's surgery didn't work than IUI is our next step. I don't think I'm comfortable with IVF, so after IUI comes adoption. I really want to adopt regardless, but my husband isn't quite on board with that plan.

@Leialou: domestic adoption is much, much cheaper! and, if you're looking to adopt a newborn (or even a baby), it's really the only way.

@bluestriped bee: honestly, i don't know if we'd ever be able to afford it. maybe i'm way off, but i would say the average person probably can't afford a $10,000 procedure.

We couldn't. Maybe after waiting a couple years to save up. We want kids so even if it takes up cutting back in our lives and waiting a couple years, we would do it.

We would make it work, but no, couldn't afford it right now. My insurance does cover some fertility treatments, at least in part, so we would start with that if it came to it. I don't think I could do IVF, though, we would both rather adopt at that point.

Fortunately in MA where we live, your health ins is required to cover ivf (unless you're on a state subsidized plan), so if we get to that point, we'd have to cover a bunch of copays but we wouldn't ever have to cover that whole amount. We don't have enough disposable income to put up for the treatments, plus all the regular fees associated with delivery & taking time off from work & a new baby all at once without the ins coverage. Makes me thankful to live in MA!

@mrs. bird: That's good to know about MA requiring IVF insurance coverage!

We couldn't... yet. It'd probably take a few years of saving. One way, you just have the expense of baby care items. The other, you have thousands more on top of all the standard stuff.

We definitely couldn't afford it, but I don't think that means you're not supposed to have kids!!

If you adopt within the foster care system, the state pays for it. But you usually can't get an infant.

I would love to adopt someday. I desperately hope we can.

When me and DH were near 1 year of trying and waiting on our infertility consult we discussed this. We could have afforded IVF after a year or so of saving, but when we discussed it neither me or DH were willing to take on the financial strain and stress (physical and mental) of IVF or adoption. We made a pact that if we needed more than meds to conceive, we would stop treatments and trying.

@photojane: You can do foster to adopt infant program. You might wait for a while, but my sister was matched very quickly and her daughter came home at 6 weeks old.

@bluestriped bee: I'm still pulling for a BFP for you... but in the event you get to the point of thinking about adoption, we can talk about the various options for lowering costs.

A simple fact is that if people keep paying exorbitant fees then agencies will keep raising the fees. It takes those of us who work hard to limit how much we'll put out in fees to change the fee structure!

@Mrs. Jacks: for sure. there's lots of info and options out there for those who really want to adopt.

we're actually planning on adopting an older child who is less likely to be adopted. we're also planning on an international adoption.

ps: i really enjoyed reading about your adoption story!

@photojane: You are so sweet. Please make sure you share your stories! Maybe I missed which country you are interested in? I used to work in Uganda, so when they opened the Uganda program, we definitely looked into it before we decided on domestic infant.

Yes, we could. If we can buy new cars, then we can afford to adopt or do IVF. But don't get me wrong, it would be with a loan, we don't have that kind of cash lying around.

We could afford IVF and I'm pretty sure we would at least try one or two rounds...I think it would be really difficult for DH and I to give up the dream of having our own genetic child and me carrying it. We also have the money for adoption, but we would wait on that as a last resort I think.