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I started to wonder after 9 months (6 of which I charted and used OPKs, so it wasn't just blind shots). I got pregnant on my 10th cycle, but miscarried. Then I started to think that I could get pregnant but not stay pregnant. After a year I joined the infertility thread on WB, and had made an appointment to talk to my OB/start preliminary tests during what would have been cycle 15 (in January, after the holidays), but I got pregnant again on cycle 13 (and it stuck).

I think after cycle 6-7 I started to wonder but I never considered myself IF. Not because I'm afraid of the term. But because I almost feeling like calling yourself IF puts you into another tier of TTC struggles. And I didn't feel like I could claim that level of struggle at that point. Even if I went on to a specialist I think the preliminary testing they do wouldnt' even classify me as IF yet until treatments were needed.

I feel like I can't classify what I went through as IF because it would downplay the struggles of people who are consistently seeing specialist and struggling day to day. Does that make sense??

I had some reservations before TTC due to some health issues I had a few years earlier. So around the 6 month mark I really got more concerned, we had been NTNP for 6 months before that but didn't think anything of those months. I casually mentioned it to my doctor at my annual and he sent me for testing right away because he felt there was enough medical history to be worried.

Firstly came the week of smiley faced OPKs starting at CD 4 month 2. Then, a month of bleeding, which came at month 6. Well, that's when my suspicions were confirmed, anyway. I had a vibe after the first month, but not for any reason. Turns out I was right, and I needed IVF to get pregnant.

@locavore_mama: Your comment really makes me feel warm and fuzzy, and I appreciate it. I don't know why it irks me to hear women who did try for a while (I'm thinking 8 months), but were totally within the normal range for average time to conception and get pregnant without any interventions at all say that they have IF. I have NO RIGHT to be annoyed, but I get that way (I say this while hanging my head in shame).

It took me 12 months to have a sticky pregnancy (well sticking so far at 18 weeks).

That included: 3 cycles to get pregnant, miscarriage at 8 weeks, 3 months to get my period back, then 4 more cycles including a possible early chemical pregnancy before sticky pregnancy.

I didn't want to post on the IF, that wasn't a label or reality I was ready to place on myself. When I got pregnant in November, I would have been ready to move to that board if I'd made it to the new year without a successful pregnancy or had a second miscarriage. Even though I have long cycles, I still didn't feel like I needed interventions to get pregnant. Even though it took a year, I didn't feel like I could relate to the IF board because I wasn't doing anything different or taking new steps to get pregnant, but I couldn't relate to "newbies" on TTC boards.

This is really interesting to me, because from what I've read, when you're infertile, you usually have an underlying issue, such as PCOS or male factor. If you don't, then you're unexplained infertile, correct?

I personally do not care for the labels of fertile or infertile. I don't know what they really define, if that makes sense. We all have factors going into TTCing that could make the process more or less difficult. In my situation, it's age and declining egg quality, as an example.

After 3 months I started to worry about male factor based on a preexisting condition I was already aware of. A couple months later two doctors had told us we needed IVF based on test results, and then they told me my situation was actually worse. So for us it wasn't based on time so much as stumbling upon the numbers.

Up to 12 months is considered normal, so even though I am over 6, I don't currently have a reason to automatically assume there is an underlying problem.

For some reason, this thread rubs me the wrong way. It feels like you are saying that if you don't get pregnant in 6 months, then there must be something wrong.

I could be overly sensitive because even though I don't have a reason to believe there is an issue (I did get one BFP that ended in MC), I am still starting to get increasingly worried at the prospect.

For now, I feel like @locavore_mama described. I don't feel like I have a right to post in a place where so many women are struggling with real issues, and I haven't even had any sort of treatment or testing.

I hope all of us get those BFPs that we so desperately crave soon. Hugs to everyone.

@meganmp: I can totally understand where you are coming from, and you don't have to be ashamed of your feelings.

we knew before starting because I went off BC the year we got married (we were still preventing) and didn't have a period for 6 months (at which point I was given provera) and didn't have regular periods after either. ultrasound and test results seemed to point PCOS, though perhaps on the milder side.

initially I was just getting Clomid through a NP and planning to try that for 4 months. and it worked, but then I had my first chemical and we made an appointment with the RE.

second time around my PCOS is much milder and I ovulate at least somewhat on my own, so I thought I might be in the clear, but after my third chemical I went back to the RE.

I somehow found the IF label easier the first time. I guess I believed what the RE said - that going full term might "cure" my hormones - and was crushed when nothing had changed.

I think everyone has the right to label themselves (or not) however they want. I like the IF boards because people all understand the testing and treatments and such, and it's a wonderful group. I can see if you were just trying and having it take a while, you might not feel ready to join there until you started testing etc. but you would be welcome anytime! the board definitely has people all over the map on how long they've been trying, what treatments they have done, etc.

I do think I was comfortable with the IF label because it meant I was getting treatment that might help. I'm a person who always wants to be proactive to fix things, so was ready to jump on the bandwagon as soon as it looked like I should.

Over 14 months, I've had 11 cycles and 1 chemical pregnancy. I have a consultation today to figure out our next steps from here. I don't know when I hit the "this is going to take some time" point. It's been an on and off feeling. And I don't know whether to label myself with IF since I haven't been tested...

@LindsayInNY: good luck today!

@LindsayInNY: good luck!

I was diagnosed with PCOS at 22 and had pretty severe symptoms anytime I wasn't managing it with BCP, so when we started trying at 26, I suspected it might be an issue. When I gained 25 lbs in a month and my period didn't come back at all for four months, I definitely had a feeling that things likely weren't going to be straightforward.
But I think it was leading up to the obligatory year, and I was still having 100+ day annovulatory cycles, that I felt the dread being "labelled" with infertility.

However, we ended up getting pregnant after 19 months with little intervention, so in retrospect, now I don't even know if I "qualify".

Both of my sisters have PCOS and my older sister had tried IUI, IVF, and donor eggs and was unable to get pregnant, so I knew going in that there might be issues and after 6 mo TTC, I went to a RE for evaluation.