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Here's a list I just jotted down - what do you all think? Obviously the posts would need some explanation, but do you think any of these titles are unclear or upsetting?
IF: Common Acronyms
IF: My First RE Appointment
IF: Questions to Ask Your RE
IF: Worries & Concerns
IF: The Proactive Patient
IF: Surgery Support
IF: HSG Test
IF: Endometriosis Support
IF: PCOS Support
IF: Professional Resources
IF: Mental & Emotional Coping Tips
IF: Recent Updates / Your TTC Journey
IF: Cycles and Support
IF: Day to Day Support
IF: Financial Questions
IF: Free Hugs
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@mrswin: Thank you, and I'm so sorry it didn't work this cycle. I wold def. change doctors if I were you. I did and felt so much better after! I just didn't feel like I clicked with the old one.
@spaniellove: @kentuckygirl: thank you girls!
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@spaniellove:
<I'm not sure I'm ready to be pigeonholed into an IVF thread, partly because it got lonely and partly because it's not clear what we're doing next. I like seeing what everyone is doing...but maybe that's just me. >
I agree completely with not wanting to be pigeonholed! It's difficult to articluate in a typed post, but maybe I can clarify. I like having our daily chat thread where we can just talk about anything and not have to be difinitive about where we may be going next in our TTC journey. But I liked the IVF thread when I was ready to learn more about IVF. I also liked that you still posted on the general IF Support thread. So in that spirit, I was thinking it could be helpful to have more of those treatment specific threads but then we could all still chat on a thread like this one. Theoretically, I would sometimes post comments on both an IUI and the IF Support threads (maybe even some copying and pasting). Or maybe the IUI thread just gives some introductory posts about our individual experiences with IUI and then a quick update on new protocols, how a cycle turned out, etc. but my main daily conversation would be on the IF Support Thread. Does that help you understand my intention with the new threads? -
@kentuckygirl: I understand what you're proposing. I made a list above of some other ideas. Maybe we start small and just create a post about "My First RE Appointment". I know it is a question that comes up when new people join in on the IF thread. A lot of us shared that information about 5-6 months ago. But maybe a new thread would help the new bees, and people who want to join in on the conversation. Anything we can do to help people understand infertility and help people not feel alone in this is worth it.
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@sweetooth: As a "newBee" I really like your idea of having different threads to address specific IF topics. I have felt at times a little overwhelmed by this thread and a little shy about asking questions due to the length and volume of info. I didn't want to ask a question thats already been answered. That being said everyone here is super welcoming and supportive. I think for me as a new bee and someone new to posting on an online community having things more specific would help me to feel more comfortable asking questions and posting.
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Maybe to divide things up, even something as simple as a monthly or quarterly thread. Kind of like how there's the "spring deals".
@Shutterbug: If you haven't had it already, good luck! Mine really wasn't bad at all. I took antibiotics and advil beforehand. I was little cramp afterwards but felt nothing at all during the procedure.
@TheSwissWifeStyle: Congratulations! I know how scary it is to be pregnant after a loss, and my loss was a super early CP. I think it's partially because the struggle to get here was so difficult and long, the thought of having a pregnancy and having it taken away to have to start all over again is terrifying.
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@MrsCB: That's exactly it! After our mc last year, I was like, "I can't believe we have to start all over." I don't know what I will do if something goes wrong this time, I feel like it will put me in a bad place...so scary!
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@MrsCB: Thank you!! I just got home, and it was really no big deal at all. There was about 5 seconds of sharp pain, and by the time I thought to myself "ow, this hurts" she said I was done. Tubes are both open, so that's good!
oh, PS - congrats on the wonderful final beta number and U/S appt!! I'm so happy for you!
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@Shutterbug: Thanks! Maybe one of these days I'll be convinced this is a sticky pregnancy, haha. Good luck, I really hope you get on a treatment plan that works for you.
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This board is overwhelming with the number of users and posts. It is really hard to keep everything straight and up to date. I read and try to keep up, but I think it would be great to have specific boards about infertility issues. You all are very supportive and welcoming, which helps a lot. I think it's just the sheer volume that is daunting.
It would be great if there were more blog articles about IF. When you do a search, there aren't a lot of articles that come up.
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I strongly vote for an updated acronyms list!! I have no idea what some of you are saying sometimes. Hahaha
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@sweetooth: Maybe think about adding one for Male Infertility? There's a lot of us that dealt with all of those different male swimmer issues, lol.
@shutterbug: So glad your HSG was like mine and pretty pain free! And even more excited no issues were found. I didn't have any either.
@derevival: I agree about IF blogs. And can anyone tell me what FX means? I see it on here all of the time, but have never gotten the guts to ask exactly what it stands for (as I can usually assume the meaning). -
@Marionberry: I think FX means fingers crossed, but I'm not sure....
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@Happygal: @marionberry: Yes, FX = fingers crossed!
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I've been hoping for stickies--posts that would always be pinned right at the top.
I've seen a few people share that they weren't sure if there was criteria for posting here, which I felt at first, too! I worried that it might seem offensive that I'm posting here when we haven't reached that year mark yet. Now I know it's okay and this is my favorite group. But a sticky note at the beginning that welcomed people and shared what the purpose of the group is would be great.
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@Spaniellove: aren't you getting your puppy boy soon?!
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@Happygal: We decided to hold off for now. I just couldn't picture us with a second dog or puppy right now and felt like if I couldn't see it, that would be a really bad thing to do for the dog's sake.
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@spaniellove: @happygal: Thank you! Was always curious!
@happygal: If we could edit that top intro section to say that in the meantime, that would be great. I agree that it may seem to outsiders like this is a kind of "members only group" or that you have to be at a certain point to join in and ask questions. I joined at something like 5 or 6 cycles I think. -
Have y'all seen that Mrs. Polish has a check-in thread?
Why don't we get together all the acronyms, welcome, etc, and then start a spring support thread once we know what we want in the first post?
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@spaniellove: Aww no puppy?! We have our kitten that we got in November (thinking we weren't getting pregnant anytime soon) and she's such a handful. I'm really worried about how she and the baby will get along. You could get something meek...like a fish, in the meantime??
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Off the top of my head...
HSG: hysterosalpingogram
MFI: male factor infertility
PCOS: polycystic ovary syndrome
RE: reproductive endocrinologist
DOR: diminished ovarian reserve -
@marionberry: Hahaha, I do have my one dog! She keeps me plenty busy...I have to keep her stocked with new toys. At the moment I have to order new squeakers and learn how to replace squeakers because she takes a brand new toy and speaks it for several hours until it dies!
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@Happygal: As a fellow IFer and a HB hostess, I have the ability to 'sticky' threads. Let me check with MrBee to see if I can sticky threads on the IF board. Of course, you can always flag a post to ask MrBee to sticky it, too.
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@spaniellove: HCG (AKA trigger shot)
SA: Sperm AnalysisI always got HSG and HCG confused.
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HCG: human chorionic gonadotropin (used in trigger shots and also measured to test for pregnancy)
HSG: hysterosalpingogram
MFI: male factor infertility
PCOS: polycystic ovary syndrome
RE: reproductive endocrinologist
SA: semen analysis
DOR: diminished ovarian reserve -
@EVERYONE i just wanted to stop in and say thank you to those who reached out on Mr.Bee's thread yesterday...
I really do appreciate everyone that commented...I know TTC is a crazy journey and it effects us all so differently.
I had a great conversation with the fertility specialist at my OB office...she orderd CD3 testing and a SA for DH and we have the results (just not sure what they mean, yet) and we will meet with her next month to go over the results and a plan to hopefully get me KU.
I had an even better apt with an accupunturist this past Tuesday, that made me realize that i really need to work on cleansing my soul and what truley makes me happy. I told her about my triggers with pregnant women and how i dont wnat to be around anyone that is pregnant...in it all i discovered that i myself am creating negative space in my heart and i really need to let that go, for me and for my well being...i want to breath what they have and i want to be truley happy for what they have instead of creating a false sense of happiness for myself. My "revelation" was challenged when DH pregnant sister called me after the appointment and wanted to meet up for coffee. she is due this sunday and had my pregnancy progressed i would have been due next week. and i have avoided her her entire pregnancy because i choose to create a wall between she and I for me to not feel hurt...so i agreed to meet with her...i cried throughout the meeting as she did, it was such a liberating moment to let her know how i felt, it was nothing ever against her it was just my feelings of this universe being unfair...after we met and talked i felt like a massive weight had been taken off my shoulders, like this was the right time to hash things out...
i know it is still going to take a while for me to fully heal, but i want that for me because i dont want to bring a child into our lives while i am brewing so many negative emotions.
this is my journey and learing how to accept it has been hard, but it is mine and i can either make the best of it or stress myself out and make myself physically sick like i have recently, but i dont want that...
thank you for "listening"
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So I love the new separate IF board. Yay!
But a little part of me thinks if I start a thread and put it into IF board that I'll get responses from non-IF users. (Some of the comments can be great but some can be a little hurtful.) I guess I have to always remind myself that sometimes they don't get it and to not take their comment personally and that they are just trying to be supportive. Maybe when I'll start creating threads, I'll title it "IFers: [insert question here.]" Just so it's a little clearer who I'm asking.
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@bluestriped bee: I mentioned this on Mr. Bee's thread, too. I tend to just ask my questions on this thread, because I get "oh don't worry so much!" type answers if I open a new thread. I think prefacing it with IF: _________ should help!
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@bluestriped bee: @Shutterbug: That is one of my concerns with the format of HB being a little different from other sites. I'm not great about filtering out the boards, so I have no idea if other people do! And I never look to see what board a thread was posted in. But prefacing it with "IF:" should help.
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@MrsCastro: I'm so glad to hear the call went well and you were able to get your bloodwork done. If you decide you'd like to mull over it with us, we can take a stab at it. Your meeting with your SIL sounds really liberating and I hope you feel that it took away some of the burden you've been carrying around with you. All of this is so hard and it's not your fault for feeling the way you do. Here's to your journey taking a more positive turn very soon!
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@MrsCastro: yay I'm glad it went well and that you had a good talk with your DH's sister! I second spaniellove, if u want some (unofficial) insight on your results
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@MrsCastro: thank you for sharing!! It must have been tough yet cathartic to talk to your sister in law. I think you make a really good point about cleansing the soul. It's hard NOT to feel negative going through this. I hope you find what works for you; I haven't tried acupuncture yet, but you're motivating me more to try it!
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Ugh... I know you ladies will commiserate with this. I just came home and grabbed the mail, and I have an invitation to a "sprinkle" for someone's 2nd baby. I'm not totally against the idea of sprinkle showers, but I expect those to be small, with only your closest friends. This is for a girl who I haven't seen or spoken to in more than a year, and although I've known her forever, it's not like we hung out all that often before that. Plus the last time I saw her, I mentioned (foolishly) how we were going to start TTC, and she said something along the lines of "Ew, don't, trust me you don't want kids. I'm so not having another one any time soon".
Clearly she failed at that plan, as she's about to have her second and meanwhile I've been shelling out thousands for just the chance to have one.
So the universe will just have to forgive my poor manners as I don't attend and don't even send a gift.
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@alie: (excuse my momentary bitterness) Doesn't it always happen like that? Argh. I support your plan.
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@alie: I can totally commiserate - and can I also comment on this "sprinkle" business? That is such a lame term for a second shower.
I also got baby mail today - a birth announcement from my husband's old roommate. Luckily my husband told me a week ago that they were expecting...umm, dude...they had their 2nd baby over 2 months ago. I know he made the right call by not telling me they were pregnant while we're in the middle of all of this. But boy did he cut it close. I would have been a little miffed to get this mail today and learn the news on my own. It made me so glad I'm still not back on FB
You don't have to go to that sprinkle - or do anything else you don't want to do.
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@Suzimo: @kentuckygirl got the ball rolling, I just picked it up and kept running with it
I'm glad you like the idea. I hope that you also feel comfortable starting threads of your own if you do have questions. I'm sure if anyone has answers or support they will chime in. I think it will take some time to get all of this organized, but I'm glad to hear that you think it will help New Bees.
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@Shutterbug: YAY for open tubes and not so painful HSG tests!
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@spaniellove: I've seen people use the abbreviation BW and U/S or some form of those letters for the typical monitoring appointments. Maybe we add that to the list? As well as CD?
HCG: human chorionic gonadotropin (used in trigger shots and also measured to test for pregnancy)
HSG: hysterosalpingogram
MFI: male factor infertility
PCOS: polycystic ovary syndrome
RE: reproductive endocrinologist
SA: semen analysis
DOR: diminished ovarian reserve
CD: Cycle Day (CD1 is the first day of your period)
BW: Bloodwork
U/S: Ultrasound -
@sweetooth: Thank you! Did you have your beta today?
BW: bloodwork
CD: cycle day (CD1 is the first day of your period)
DOR: diminished ovarian reserve
HCG: human chorionic gonadotropin (used in trigger shots and also measured to test for pregnancy)
HSG: hysterosalpingogram
MFI: male factor infertility
PCOS: polycystic ovary syndrome
RE: reproductive endocrinologist
SA: semen analysis
U/S: ultrasound -
@MrsCastro: Glad to hear that you had a good conversation with the fertility specialist. And I couldn't agree more with you about "cleansing your soul". It's so healthy to work through the feelings and emotions that all of this brings out in you. That meeting with your sister-in-law sounds very cathartic!
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