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We've had 2 miscarriages and DH and I have always firmly held to the view that miscarriage has no bearing on whether or not you are a mom or a dad. You got pregnant, you're a mom/dad. So we always got each other cards for Mother's Day and Father's Day. DH also always got me flowers for Mother's Day.

I know it might seem weird to some, but getting a sweet card from my husband about what a great mom I was every day I was pregnant and how lucky our children were and future children will be to have me as their mother really made me feel better.

I do have DD but was struggling with infertility the "first Mother's day" of when we were TTC. I just silently struggled and survived it with a smile plastered on my face despite what was going on inside. You'll get through it...

Mother's Day has always been hard for me because I grew up without my mom, and with one of my m/c's last year it was my due date which ruined it even further. You are allowed to feel the things you want to feel for yourself. No matter what anyone else says, you don't have to celebrate everyone else's motherhood. It would be nice if your loved ones understood why this year is tough for you, but if they don't, just indulge in yourself. One day hopefully it will be a day of celebration for you and then you can take care of everyone else.

This was me last year-Mother's Day was so, so hard. But I agree with @gingerbebe: you get pregnant, you're a mama. So be gentle and do something nice for yourself. Sending you big hugs

Are we living the same life? I had a break down in Target today as they were putting out the cards. I understand how awful it feels. I planted a new rose bush this weekend in memory of my first due date. Maybe you could do something like that? Or if you are close to your mom then you could spend some time with her.

I felt the same way last year, its rough. I was in a restaurant while on vacation, thinking I escaped most of Mother's day. Instead, they give me a carnation and I head to the bathroom to let it out. Dealing with IF + miscarriages is the hardest thing I've ever gone though, and I'm not sure Mother's day will ever feel like it should. Hugs to you, you're not alone!