Hellobee Boards

Bumping and following.

LO tries to hit us when he's frusterated too. It is more like he puts his arms up in the arm and brings them down really fast over and over again while he is near us or tries to get near us. We usually hold his arms down and say we don't hit or try to hit and give him a time out and usually try to get him to talk it out. He is good at talking but when he's like this he talking ability goes out the window and he just gunts at us. (edit : he is almost 3 right now and I should be giving birth in a few weeks)

So I can see him doing that to the new baby too.

I'm not sure if it's right or if it will work. I guess our plan is just to do about the same thing... hold down his hands, tell him it's not okay, give him a time out and when he settles down have him say sorry to the little one.

We have the same issue with DS hitting when he gets frustrated. The problem is that time outs don't work for him. He thinks they're sort of fun so I'm at a complete loss as to how to deal with it. We tell him no and read the "hands are not for hitting" book a lot. He knows better but still isn't to the point where he can or will communicate what's wrong before we get to the hitting stage. I can only imagine what's going to happen with DS2 comes along.

LO 1 shoved her sister the other day when they were fighting over a shopping cart. I took her aside and made her sit on the couch, calm down and say sorry.

Following!

LO1 went through a hitting phase soon after LO2 was born. Similar to what it sounds like you're dealing with, worst when he is tired. We did time outs and made a big deal about holding the baby and asking if he was ok, giving kisses, etc. the making LO1 give apology hug and kiss. When he was particularly bad he got sent to bed for a little while. Just a time out in his room usually but sometimes an early nap. He has since outgrown that and moved on to taking away or throwing toys. Good luck!

My SIL's suggestion was to put feelings with the action, "It makes mommy/baby/daddy/etc sad when you do x, y, or z behaviors. The problem is we haven't really covered happy, sad, etc so we are working on it

@Chuckles: I think that's great advice - give them something to do instead!

L has started 'hitting' recently (not quite hitting, but I know that's her intent and it will get there quickly), and telling her 'no'/timeouts/redirecting her hasn't curbed it at all. I think she needs me to give her an acceptable outlet so she knows how to handle her frustration. I can't really think of anything I find acceptable though... haha