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We've quit twice.
First time she started holding for hours and then screaming when her poor bladder couldn't hold it anymore.
Second time we had two perfect days an then she started peeing on the floor for fun and then peed in her stuffed animal toy box. I was up to my elbows in pee soaked stuffies. Eff that!

We'll try again in a few weeks.

So no advice just commiseration.

You might try toilet learning instead of a cold turkey method.... Lets them get there developmentally before you have to suffer the consequences

I wish I had advice but we are in the midst of potty training my 3.5 son and it's been terrible. He's gone pee a few times in the potty but for the most part he just pees in his underwear. We started 2 weeks ago and had really hoped he would catch on but I think he just doesn't care to be wet. We have also noticed baby like behavior and defiance as well. We have wanted to throw in the towel so many times but he is 3.5 and the only kid not potty trained yet in his daycare class so we don't really feel like we can hold out any longer. It sucks!

I think it should feel right for all of you, and I don't think giving up would be bad. It sounds really rough right now. @Mrs. Jacks: I love the toilet learning approach. We've been doing it since 10 months, and it's been a nice, slow introduction, which seems to always improve. Best wishes!

@littlejoy: I wish I knew about it for #1. She had a withholding poop problem because she wasn't ready for the transition when we did it. #2 went smooth as could be.

I felt EXACTLY the same on the first day! I think I posted something similar. Everyone told me it gets better but I didn't believe them. The first half of the second day was just as awful, and I was ready to throw in the towel. Then something clicked after her nap on the second day. By the third day she got it! We've been day trained ever since (she did have a few accidents the first couple weeks). Using a potty seat on the toilet instead of a potty chair made all the difference for us. It does get better, I promise!! Potty training is not easy/fun!

That said, if you guys aren't ready it's totally okay to quit and try again later!

Are you using any rewards? That was what really worked for us--finding rewards he liked. And then he was self motivated to use the potty. Before that, if we tried to push it he would just tantrum.

@Smurfette: no, she pees while she's sleeping. Neither the need to go or the actual act of going wake her up, so there's no way to actually night train her until she grows out of that.

@Smurfette: yes! We tried pull-ups, but they're just expensive diapers. They feel the same to her, so I just went back to diapers. She usually doesn't pee during her nap, but until she starts waking when she needs to go, I'm going to keep putting the diaper on. It has worked out fine for us... it doesn't confuse her. She is fully trained while she's awake.

For the first couple weeks we let her run around bottomless (no pull up, no undies) whenever we were home. It was easier for her to feel when she needed to go and not have an accident. We skipped pull ups and just did undies while we were out... I just had to ask her frequently if she had to go. Pull ups aren't much different than diapers, imo. Can she wear undies to daycare?

@petunia354: it's okay if he's not ready! Boys definitely take longer than girls. It will happen eventually. Fwiw, Sadie didn't like her potty seat either. As soon as we started using the kind that sits on the big toilet, she was much happier. She had been watching me use the potty for so long, she wanted to use the big potty.

@photojane: ugh, now I'm wondering if I should have held out longer. We were 36 hours into it with zero success and she was growing more and more annoyed. The only way i could get her to sit on the potty was by setting a timer and when it went off she knew to go sit on it and try to go.

@photojane: we are going out now. I just put a pull-up over her panties so she will still feel if she has an accident but it won't make a mess over Costco! I am going to send her in pull ups tomorrow and see how she does. Then I will talk to her teacher when I pick her up, I don't see her teachers in the am, about panties. I am going to guess they want her dry in pulls for a week before we do them at school. But I don't want her to regress.
@petunia354: Boys take longer! Don't worry about it!! He won't be in kindergarten in diapers!

We have backed off the training too. Not worth fighting with him. I'm a month away from LO 2 and I don't want to put the effort into it if he's going to revert after baby arrives.

Sounds like he's not ready. We had a really good weekend of training and then suddenly he was really against the potty. I totally dropped it including even asking if he wanted to go. A few weeks later I asked him if he wanted to wear underwear. He said no. But then 30 mins later said yes and he completely trained himself within a few days. This was about 6 weeks before he turned 3. Rare accidents and two month later he night trained himself.

@Smurfette: we are in limbo right now too. She is pretty much trained at home, as long as she is naked. Once you put underwear on her though she now thinks she can go in them. She was fully trained for a month before regressing so it's super frustrating. At 7 mo pregnant I'm way too tired to deal with it so I'm putting her in pull-ups when we go out and about and taking a more stress free approach. I know she knows what she has to do, she's just stubborn!

Thought I would update since I saw this thread and it did take a little push but she figured it out on her own after a couple weeks. We were doing pull ups for out because it was less stressful for all involved and we didn't want her to get a UTI from holding it. Hope everyone who is struggling gets there soon, it is such a relief. We are still doing diapers at night because physically I don't think she is quite ready. Eta and I read that a regression is common around 3..which is when we're also expecting a new baby. So we may be back here soon...