MY DH is laying down the law on nap training our 7-month-old. Today is day 1. He has been in his crib for 20 minutes total and has been full on crying for the past 5 minutes.
Do I go in and check on him/comfort him or should I just let him cry? What if he never goes to sleep? At what point do I take him out?
Of course, DH is sleeping so I am dealing with this on my own and I HATE hearing my baby cry. 
GOLD / coconut / 8266 posts
Do you have a musical mobile? I would go in and start the mobile and then walk out.
GOLD / coconut / 8266 posts
@rahlyrah: music helps R fall asleep. Maybe stand over his crib and comfort him. Play a song by the Piano Guys on your phone!
honeydew / 7586 posts
@swedishfish: Checking in just caused him to go into full blown, shrieking, hysterics. 
I can't do this.
GOLD / wonderful coconut / 33402 posts
1) Wake up your husband. If he is laying down the law, he needs to be up for it
2) Go take a walk and let him deal with it
or
If you think checks will help, then do that. Checks made R even more pissed off. Pat his back, sing to him, etc.
GOLD / coconut / 8266 posts
@rahlyrah: don't cry! Just let him be. Turn off the sound on the monitor and walk away. Check in 10 minutes and see how he's doing.
wonderful cherry / 21504 posts
@rahlyrah: I think it depends on the baby. With C, we could go in, pick her up and comfort her, then put her back down-- sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't, but standing over her to comfort her made it worse. Just don't let him fall asleep while you are holding him if you can help it. Crying hard for 20 minutes would be too much for me-- I'd be a wreck. Usually C would cry hard but only for a couple minutes, calm down, fuss, fuss, fuss, cry for 3 minutes, calm... repeat. It sucked but that only lasted a day or two.
I would accept defeat on the nap after 30 minutes, maybe, and try again in another half hour?
GOLD / wonderful coconut / 33402 posts
@rahlyrah: Aww, I know that it is so hard to hear them dry. Seriously wake up your husband. It isn't fair that you have to deal with it on your own.
pomegranate / 3895 posts
@rahlyrah: I highly recommend the Isis webinar on napping in the crib, you can find it on youtube.
For morning naps you really want a minimum of 60 mins, and 90 in the afternoon. So you should keep baby in the room for that long, but you can choose if you want to do checks, PU/PD or extinction. If the nap fails after 60 mins, get him up and play quietly for a little while and then put him back down within the hour. Watch the webinar though - super helpful! Also, check out the Baby Center group that's called Teaching your Baby or Toddler to sleep.
wonderful cherry / 21504 posts
@rahlyrah: I absolutely cried when we sleep trained. You need your DH with you. Not just for support, but because you will want to kill him if he sleeps through all this. This is coming from someone whose husband went to the golf store with his while I nap trained the baby. It wasn't pretty.
cantaloupe / 6630 posts
I second waking DH up. If he's laying down the law he needs to put his money where his mouth is. Hugs.
kiwi / 645 posts
@rahlyrah: After reading a post from Mrs. Superhero on HB, we tried the Sleep Sense program. Our daughter had always been a great sleeper, but after a major sleep regression and vacation she refused to sleep in her crib for naps. After one day of following the program she was back in her crib and putting herself to sleep.
honeydew / 7586 posts
@heartonastring: He finally fell asleep after 40 minutes. Ugh.
I just watched the webinar. In it, they advised against letting him nap in the car. However, two days a week we have MyGym and Pilates and it is almost impossible to keep him awake on the drive home. Usually, if he falls asleep I just sit in the driveway and play on my phone until he wakes up. If I continue doing this, will it hurt his crib-naps?
Do you guys have a trick for keeping LO awake in the car?
GOLD / wonderful coconut / 33402 posts
@rahlyrah: I try and sing really loud to her. Sometimes I will clap my hands. It is hard and I usually lose the battle. If you are crib nap training, I would skip them this week. Once he is use to the crib, two naps a week in the crib won't hurt him from napping in the crib.
honeydew / 7586 posts
One more question...
Because it took him so long to go to sleep, he will be waking up much later than usual. This is partially DH's fault (he let me sleep in because I took an Ambien but kept B up an hour past his normal nap time so that I could nap train-ugh). So, what do I do about his second nap? He usually naps around 1 or 1:30. If I push back his second nap then do I have to push back his bed time?
I'm sorry I have so many questions!
GOLD / wonderful coconut / 33402 posts
@rahlyrah: I would push it back a little, or the first sign you see that he is tired. Then push back bedtime a little.
GOLD / watermelon / 14076 posts
@rahlyrah: I agree with @Smurfette:--I would skip some activities this week. Consistency is key (especially in the beginning). It will be so worth it, though. DH was out of town last week and my mom was over helping me and she couldn't believe that I could just do our routine and M would babble to herself then roll over and fall asleep in her crib. She said we got lucky...I was like ummm I trained her we did not get lucky!!
I also agree about pushing his next nap back a little. See how that one goes then you can figure out bedtime.
ETA: Re: keeping him awake in the car. This is really silly, but M always get wide-eyed when DH coughs or sneezes so I pretty much fake cough and sneeze our entire drive home. I am sure I look like an idiot, but it works.
pomelo / 5326 posts
@rahlyrah: sorry nap training is resulting in your tears When I nap trained LO at about 3.5 months I did pick her up after 5 mins of crying. Since she was so young I couldn't handle any more than that. If she was just kinda fussing a bit I just let her be. At the 5 minute mark of full blown crying, I'd go in and pick her up, burp her again, rub her back, then put her back down, kiss, and walk away. That maybe took a minute. Then she'd typically fall asleep after that. She's 5 months now, and for her morning and afternoon nap, she'll fuss for maybe a minute and go to sleep. She still takes a short 30 minute third nap and for that one I either have to hold her, or nurse her to sleep before putting her in the crib. I think she'll likely drop this one soon anyways.
I would also push back the second nap, and ultimately bedtime too for the day. I find when I push bedtime back a bit, it doesn't affect my next day too much. Our naps aren't at an exact time yet.
@lawbee11: love your coughing and sneezing idea! We usually just poke LO in the head (gently!) but this is awkward to do from the front seat while driving. I'll steal your idea.
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