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My youngest has had the symptoms you describe pretty much all winter/spring. He’s a daycare kid. We go everywhere and he goes to school like that 2x per week. We don’t quarantine! Lol. I also call a cold a cold, not mask it as seasonal allergies.

Yes, I know someone who claims anything and everything is “allergies”. It’s really annoying and inconsiderate. Several of my friends and I have kids in preschool and babies at home; we always provide advanced notice of symptoms so we can make an informed decision about play dates. Often, we will go ahead with a play date. But if it is an especially inconvenient time to get sick (say right before an important event), then we will cancel just to be safe. I think that’s reasonable.

@Adira: Exactly this! Though I will add that it's often also really hard to tell the difference between a cold and allergies. My daughter got super congested two weeks ago and the post-nasal drip was giving her a cough as well, and she was like that all week and yes, I sent her to school, and it wasn't until she developed a fever that I kept her home. We took her to the doc because I suspected a sinus infection, and our doc told us allergies are so heavy right now because of late bloom that they're seeing kids getting crazy allergies that turn into larger infections because they're outside a lot with the weather. So, long story being, it isn't always something contagious. That said, I personally practice full disclosure and tell anyone we might interact with that something might be up but we don't know what so play with us at your own risk.

@peachykeen: I'm curious about that seasonal allergy information. My youngest has eczema and it always seems to flare up during pollen season, so I kind of assumed that was partly due to season allergies (I also have seasonal allergies).

Yeah, it's rude not to tell other parents that your kid has a runny nose or cough or worse, but I feel like it's fair to assume some sort of mild illness comes along with any kid who is in daycare or school. Meet them on neutral territory, preferably outdoors, and bring hand sanitizer. I've also seen a lot of exposed warts on kids lately, so that adds an extra element of excitement to get-togethers too.

@Hypatia: i think like previous posters have said kids in daycare have lots of coughs and runny noses and i don't consider my child sick everytime her nose is runny. For me a fever is an indication that something is more serious than just the daycare nose

@KT326: maybe we disagree due to the amount of days off I get, I get 27 total days off a year so if my kids are sick or not feeling well I take a day off. I don't think it's fair to them, their daycare provider, teachers or other kids to send them when they are sick.

@skinnycow: I keep my kids home if they have a constant cough or a barky cough, if they are coughing regularly you know it. I keep them home if their noses are really congested or running constantly and if it's thickish (does that make sense). I also keep my kids home if they have rough nights... for my kids a clear indicator is how they sleep at night. If they have rough nights we stay home the next day. Obviously we all make decisions about these things and obviously we aren't all going to agree. However, when I walk into daycare or preschool and hear a kid that's constantly coughing the entire time I am there I cringe or I see the kid with green slime hanging on their face.. I also cringe....

ETA: I see some people who defer to the fever... my kids very rarely get fevers so I don't use that as an indicator. In fact my DS who is 14 mos has never run a fever, even with a double ear infection. So I don't necessarily believe that a fever is a must to be "sick" or to be "kept home"

@Ajsmommy: Like others have said, I can't keep my kid home every time they have a cough or a runny nose. If I could afford to do that, I wouldn't NEED them to be in daycare! Our daycare has a sick policy and we follow it. They stay home for fevers, vomiting, or diarrhea. If it's just a cough and/or runny nose, they can attend.

Especially during that first year of daycare, my kid had something new every single week. I can't afford to stay home with my kid 1-2 times a week EVERY SINGLE WEEK. That's just impossible and no one expects working parents to do that.

Also, my kids have asthma that's viral induced. Literally every time they have a cold, they have a cough. LITERALLY. I can't keep them home for that. They have inhalers at daycare and their teachers know when and how to administer their inhalers for their asthma. But other parents probably don't realize that my kids are coughing because they have asthma and NOT because this particular illness comes with a cough. All illnesses cause a cough in our home because of asthma.

@Adira: so you're admitting to sending them when the are "sick" just not "sick enough" to be kept home?

And please don't think I'm being angry or aggressive or anything.. but don't you see the issue in that?

@Ajsmommy: My kid has a constant runny nose and light cough, but he is a happy guy. He sleeps through the night and doesn’t complain. I wouldn’t really consider him sick, just keeps getting colds.. A fever is another story. If he has a fever he’s kept home obviously.

I used to care when my first was a baby since I was always nervous about colds and sleep. By #2, I’m kind of like, “It will only make him stronger” ha! Better he has strong immunities built so he can be present in elementary school.

I have family sick time and personal sick time. I took 5 days in a row when my oldest had the flu. As a teacher, being out is so much work! Sub plans.

@Adira. My youngest has eczema too and he has a crazy flare up right now... I wonder if it is due to spring and allergies.

@Ajsmommy: I do see the issue, but unfortunately, that's just the way it is. Until our society cares enough about this issue to try to fix it, there's nothing I can do about it. I keep my kids home when they are really sick or when I'm especially concerned about their asthma (they've been hospitalized multiple times), but I just can't stay home with them every time they have a runny nose or a cough or I'd have to stay home with them every week for 9 months straight. If I could AFFORD to do that, I wouldn't need to be sending them to daycare in the first place.

@Adira: @Alba4: I think they're specifically referring to hay fever with the "allergies before 3 are rare" thing. It was explained by a colleague (pediatrician) that they just haven't been exposed to the allergen long enough. I'm sure there are exceptions to that, of course.

We live in GA where the spring pollen is insane, so I imagine kids could see some symptoms from that. DH and I both suffer from terrible allergies so I've been concerned about DD1, but she still hasn't shown any real symptoms at 3.5 - knock on wood...

Here's some similar info I found online, but I'm sure it depends on the situation :

From Seattle Children's -
"Nose and Eye Allergies: Age of Onset
*Seasonal pollen allergies usually begin at age 2 to 5 years.
*The symptoms peak in school age children, teens and young adults.
*Pollen symptoms are rare in children under age 2. They require at least 2 seasons of exposure to the pollen.
*Children under age 2 who have chronic nasal symptoms have other causes. Examples are recurrent colds, large adenoids or cow's milk allergy.
*Food allergies can start during the first year of life, but not pollen allergies."

http://www.seattlechildrens.org/medical-conditions/symptom-index/hay-fever/

https://www.parents.com/health/allergies/seasonal/things-you-didnt-know-about-kids-seasonal-allergies/

@Adira: @Ajsmommy: I don't send my son to daycare when he has a fever, but I don't keep him home for every cough or sniffle either. Not really an option when you have limited days off.

@WinterBee: I didn't even count DH's sick days... so yeah, if our kids are sick we keep them home. Just better for everyone involved.

@MamaG: Exactly. Cold symptoms can also last for a week plus. It's pretty ridiculous and unrealistic to act like we should all stay home with our kids for a week or more every time they have a sniffle. We follow daycare policy: fever-free or vomiting-free for 24 hours.

Ugh, that seems totally unnecessary. A lot of people have no choice about sending sick kids to day care, but a visit with friends is optional - why not cancel?

Unless maybe their kid is in day care and they legit don't notice cold symptoms any more because they're going on allll the time.

@Adira: how many days off a year do you get? And how many does your husband get?

At my daycare, mild colds with no fevers are specifically allowed in the policy. If it were against the policy (and perhaps it should be), we would be much stricter when sending our kids to daycare. As is, we 100% follow the policy but do send with sniffly noses. No one loves it but in America...it is what it is. My husband "technically" gets sick days but they go on his permanent record as unexcused absences. My days are typically not flexible. Of course I will rearrange everything for a true illness, but it's not feasible to take off for every minor cold and still maintain my job performance. I feel for everyone in this situation--it just stinks!

Optional events are different. If my kids are sick, I'm not going to force them on other people.