My mom talks to me like I have lost my mind when I tell her that I plan on keeping LO in daycare PT or FT when the baby arrives.
Did you or will you you send your older LO to daycare or preschool even though you are at home caring for a younger child?
I know it is possible and people do it all the time... but we have budgeted for daycare and I want LO to stick with a routine. I also don't want to lose patience with her during those tough newborn days!
wonderful grape / 20453 posts
Everyone I know sends their older child to daycare when they have the second baby! Baby #2 deserves all that attention, too 
And you *could* attend to both, but...why? She's used to daycare, she likes it, it's a routine. Adjust her to the new baby slowly instead of all at once
hostess / wonderful persimmon / 25556 posts
I can't imagine being home with two - one newborn who needs constant attention and one older child who may be jealous about all the time you're spending with the new one. I think it's a great idea!
honeydew / 7444 posts
Most choose to keep #2 in daycare so that they don't lose the spot when they have to go back to work. Plus, it's easier to get #2 into the same daycare if #1 goes there too.
nectarine / 2797 posts
Oh heck yes when I have a second my first will still be going to daycare. I can't afford to lose my spot there. There may be some days where I pull her out to do a special activity or something, but for the most part I want her routine to stay constant.
GOLD / wonderful coffee bean / 18478 posts
I've already told you this, but heck yeah I am keeping DD in daycare! I'm only on leave for 3 months anyway. It's not that long and it won't be worth losing her spot to save 3 months of daycare money. Plus, it will be really helpful to me so I can focus on getting to know the baby instead of splitting my time all day. DD doesn't nap so I think I would go nuts.
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
@Andrea: If my mom was tech savvy or hip...she would probably type SMH about us right now! LOL!
honeydew / 7917 posts
I had to watch my 2 month old niece and my 19 month old for two days in a row, and I thought I was going to go crazy. My LO was a trooper, but I felt so bad giving most of my attention to the baby. I was supposed to watch my niece for a few months, but I made sure my sister knew that it would be impossible. I'm hoping my LO will start preschool by the time I have #2.
pomelo / 5093 posts
Oh man, why on earth would you disrupt that routine??? And make life harder for yourself? No way! Your child probably loves their preschool. And you'll be a better parent not running yourself ragged. As if a newborn isn't hard enough!
persimmon / 1427 posts
I think most people don't disrupt the routine and keep LO in school when #2 comes.
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
@sarac: I agree! My mom and MIL say I should stay home with both....but DH and I both went to daycare PT and our moms were at home! Parents have selective memories....
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21616 posts
oh my gosh this is so surprising!! I had never heard of doing this until Hellobee... I think people would freak out if they heard/saw I was doing this haha! My mom had six kids and none of us went to daycare.
In theory I think I might not mind, even just 1-2x a week would be a nice little break for some alone time with #2... but I don't think I would do this.
That being said - do what you need to do!
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
@Mrs. Pen: I think I freaked out about it too when my friend did it a few years ago during her maternity break(her 3 year old went to preschool PT while she was home with newborn twins) but now I understand!
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21616 posts
@autumnlove: I think if my LO was older and in preschool I wouldn't disrupt it because that's... school. But daycare I probably wouldn't. And I definitely understand - babies are a lot of work and much harder when you have a second LO who obviously doesn't understand why they will be receiving less attention etc..
blogger / pomegranate / 3300 posts
I didn't send any of my kids to day care when the others were born but I do understand it.
pomegranate / 3643 posts
@Mrs. Pen: I think that would be one of the big benefits, big bro/sis wouldn't be pulled out of school to watch baby get all this new attention!
squash / 13764 posts
I will absolutely send LO #1 to daycare/preschool part time when LO#2 is born! First of all, to get a break, and second, because I think the socialization aspect is really good for kids.
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
@Mrs. Pen: Ya, and it will only be 3 months of maternity leave for me. I don't want to take LO out and have her adjust again when I go back to work!
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21616 posts
@autumnlove: that's very true... I guess in the case of someone who is a SAHM, like me, it wouldn't make sense. Considering your situation I totally get it
pomelo / 5093 posts
Yeah, I mean, I wouldn't send my child special to a daycare while I was on leave or a stay at home mom. But if my daughter is in preschool when my next baby comes (surely?) I certainly wouldn't take her out of it.
GOLD / pomelo / 5737 posts
I would keep the older child in preschool!
I'm all for whatever childcare help one can afford or get! No judgment, no questions asked from me!!
hostess / papaya / 10540 posts
I see nothing wrong with your plan, especially since you won't be home for very long. I say there's nothing wrong with enjoying that special time with LO#2 and not disrupting LO#1's schedule. Plus, in many instances you can actually lose your daycare spot once you remove your child.
I'm a SAHM, but when my LO is older I'm hoping we will be able to send him to preschool part time (like twice a week for 2 or 3 hours) especially if we have a second baby. I want him to get a feel for that type of environment before he starts school, I want to give LO #2 that special solo bonding time, and it would lighten the load for getting some things done. I know there's other SAHMs that have childcare while they do something like work out, take classes, or just to have some mental health time.
I think all you can do it what feels right to you. It makes me sad when it feels like moms judge each other for doing what they feel is in their and their family's best interest. Good for you for sticking to what you feel is right!
persimmon / 1341 posts
I would keep the older one in school/daycare. It's a fun place for them with a routine. If they all of the sudden don't get to go see their friends and teachers and play and have fun because there's a new baby it could lead to resentment of the baby. It makes your life easier and is good for your older one.
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