Sleep training dilemma...what to do??

By Freckles Dec 8, 2012

LO is 8 months next week and still needs one nursing session a night. I put her to bed at 7-7:30pm, she wakes up 8-9 hours later for a 15 min feed and she goes to sleep as soon as i put her in the crib. She will sleep for another 3-4 hours later and wake up anywhere between 7:15 and 7:45am.

I decided i can't keep up with this fragmented sleep any longer, and i'm thinking of sleep training her (via extinction) so that she sleeps straight through the night.

I'm a little worried that if she starts STTN, she will wake up earlier, like at 6am! But a part of me feels like it's time to wean the night feed. What do you think...should i tough it out for another month and see if she will naturally drop a feed and sleep through the night? Or should i just do it now? Ahh, i didn't realize i've become such a wuss.

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17 comments

Mrs. Yoyo
blogger / pomelo / 5400 posts

Dec 8, 2012

Well, you said yourself that you're having a hard time with the wake up. For that reason, I'd go ahead and she if she responds to sleep training. She may wake up a bit earlier, but she may not ... my LO generally sleeps from 7:30ish - 7.

My LO didn't sleep through on his own until a year, FYI -- he had that one wakeup for a long time. (He had a week of STTN at 10 mos and then we moved, though, so I'll never know if he would have kept doing it if we hadn't screwed it up!) I tried half-heartedly once or twice to let him CIO, but he got SO SO PISSED that I just decided I could deal with it until he was ready.
mrbee
admin / wonderful grape / 20724 posts

Dec 8, 2012

If she's not sick, I would do it now!

Every time we wanted to sleep train Olive, she would get sick and we would postpone it. Since winter season is coming up, I'd do it now. As for the early morning wakeups, Olive sometimes does wake up around 6 am now but she will go back to sleep after a morning feed if Bee holds her (and naps too hehe). That seems to make it more bearable for everyone involved!
Freckles
honeydew / 7444 posts

Dec 9, 2012

@Mrs. Yoyo: Soo...how pissed did he get? I regret not doing it earlier as advised by my pediatrician, but I was always worried she wasn't getting enough to eat. I was always reluctant to do it the last couple of months because DH had 8am classes to teach...but now that classes are over i'm thinking it's time.

@mrbee: I'm wondering if earlier wakeups may mean longer naps? I'm looking forward to Mrs. Bee blogging about night weaning Olive! I am nervous about tonight. I find that the older the get, the harder it is to hear them cry.
mrbee
admin / wonderful grape / 20724 posts

Dec 9, 2012

@caffeinated: You may have already seen this one, but Bee blogged a bit about the sleep training here!
http://www.hellobee.com/2012/11/29/13-month-and-35-month-update/

It's continuing to go really well... it's been night and day since the sleep training!
Freckles
honeydew / 7444 posts

Dec 9, 2012

@mrbee: Yep, read it! But i know night weaning is a whole different ballgame. It was easy for me to sleep train LO to fall asleep at night, but it's going to be quite difficult for me to ignore the cries at 4am. I'm glad sleep training is going well for you guys!
Mrs. Yoyo
blogger / pomelo / 5400 posts

Dec 9, 2012

@caffeinated: Well, pissed enough to cry, then cry harder, then HARDER for an hour. That's as long as I could stand before I gave in and nursed him. Maybe you're stronger-willed than I am!
mrbee
admin / wonderful grape / 20724 posts

Dec 9, 2012

@caffeinated: I think the sleep training has really helped Olive with her self-soothing... she's STTN at least twice this week!
Rainbow Sprinkles
eggplant / 11287 posts

Dec 9, 2012

I would see if she will naturally drop the feeding on her own once she gets older...but that's just me!
Freckles
honeydew / 7444 posts

Dec 9, 2012

Well, she woke up a little after 3am and was whining/fussing for 30 minutes. DH decided to go up to comfort her, and unfortunately that started her on an all-out wail. Ahhh! She cried for 30 minutes with lots of breaks, and eventually went to bed at 4am and slept until 7am. I was hoping she'd have a longer nap but it was the same 1.5 hour nap this morning. Sigh. We'll see what happens tonight!
Rubies
hostess / eggplant / 11068 posts

Dec 9, 2012

When LO was 6-8 months old, she had two night feeds (12am and 4am). At 8 months she naturally dropped one feeding and from 8-10 months she woke up once at 4am. At 10 months, she just dropped it on her down and started sleeping through the night entirely (12 solid hours). Her naps stayed the same. But she did start waking up a little bit earlier.
Freckles
honeydew / 7444 posts

Dec 9, 2012

@Rubies: I know some babies (of friends) who after 1 year, still wake up at night and i think it's fearing (more than anything else) that she won't naturally drop the feed like yours did. I sooo do not want to try and night wean when she's standing in the crib crying!
Sammyfab
pomegranate / 3383 posts

Dec 9, 2012

I think she did great on her first night! With us, we were getting 12.5-13 hours of night sleep when he had the early morning feed (my LO would sleep 11+ hours, eat then sleep another 1.5-2 more). When he totally dropped the feed he did end up waking earlier and sleeping less at night overall (11-12 hours).

I'm not sure why you want her to nap longer though? 1.5 hours is a good nap! Average sleep needs at 8 months is about 14 hours total so if you want her to get more nap sleep that may cut into her night sleep. I'd rather my LO sleep lots at night!
Rubies
hostess / eggplant / 11068 posts

Dec 9, 2012

@caffeinated: Yeah, totally, that would be so awful!!! I think if you sleep train your LO now (like last night), you'll have some very good outcome. Good luck! Stay strong!
Freckles
honeydew / 7444 posts

Dec 9, 2012

@Sammyfab: I think it's because she used to have 2 hour morning naps, and it's consistently been 1.5 hours these days. She will usually have a total of 3-3.5 hours of naps. She once had two 45 minute naps, and her evening sleep stayed exactly the same...i was very disappointed!

@Rubies: Crossing my fingers for night #2!
Mrs. Bee
admin / watermelon / 14210 posts

Dec 9, 2012

@caffeinated: i night weaned olive! and it was a million times easier than i ever expected. there isn't much to write about in a post, so i was going to just include it in my next monthly update.

basically she was waking up twice a night and i left her to cry. but she never cried more than a couple minutes and just went back to sleep. that happened for 3 nights. on the 4th night, she slept until 6 or 7 am and has been doing so since without waking up. but she goes back down in the morning after i nurse her until 8-8:30.

i was scared that she would start waking up earlier too, but it hasn't happened yet. fingers crossed!

i stuck out the wake ups for a long time because i'd rather wake up once in the middle of the night than early in the morning. your lo might sleep less at night without the wakeup since she's less tired.

it's only been one week since we sleep trained though, so hopefully it continues to do well. of course she got sick today and had a fever, so all bets are off. sigh.

good luck whatever you decide to do!!
Sammyfab
pomegranate / 3383 posts

Dec 9, 2012

@caffeinated: my LO used to sleep 2 hours for his first nap too but now we rarely get over 1.5. Anything over 1 hour is good in my books! Sleep needs change all the time so your LO may just not need as much sleep. My LO went from sleeping 15+ hours in a day to 14 hours in a couple of days. Your LO may be a high sleep needs baby though :). We've had days where my LO takes an hour morning nap and then a 30-minute afternoon nap. I hate those days!!!
Freckles
honeydew / 7444 posts

Dec 9, 2012

@Mrs. Bee: I think i would've night weaned a long time ago if she was waking up more than once a night! Congrats on finally night weaning Olive!! I really hope it's only a few minutes of crying tonight. I noticed that she nursed for a lot longer before going to sleep so maybe that's a sign.

@Sammyfab: It's amazing how quickly she's changing her sleep habits. It only feels like yesterday that she had to be put down after 1.5 hours of awake time. She is definitely a high sleep needs baby...i dread dealing with her whining after she wakes up from a 45 minute nap.

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Sleep training dilemma...what to do??

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