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I also have been getting alot of parents warn me about having babies, to the point where now that we're ready to have a baby I have kept quiet about it to avoid the "they're cute until they puke" or "they are cute for five minutes then they're work" or, "you'll NEVER sleep again" etc. I know the hard work that raising a child entails. And I'm not going to choose to NOT have a child to avoid that. So i can do without the fear-mongering that I feel I get a lot. On the other hand, lots of friends "vent and complain" about their babies not sleeping through the night, etc. That is completely understandable! i don't mind when people complain/vent, I just mind when they "warn" me of my future doom and gloom when I say I want a baby.

we hear this often - thus, why we refuse to tell anyone we're TTC until we have a baby on board. as far as we know, we're medically okay, but our reasonings are just plain and simple that we'd like to expand our family sooner rather than later. and though it's taken me a few months to come to terms with it, I've finally realized it's no one's business but our own.

just on Thanksgiving we were all talking baby names (generally speaking) and my grandmother goes, "not for 3 years you're not"...oh okay, didn't realize it was YOUR decision for US to have a baby! grr..

People always said how my life would be over with kids, but it isn't! It is just a new life. And one that I enjoy so much more!!!! Maybe our Friday nights aren't about going to the bar and staying out late with friends, but I think having a family movie night and eating popcorn is great!

Yes kids can be hard, and being a parent can be stressful, but it is worth it and so much more rewarding. And, we still have our nights out just the two of us, we just have to have a babysitter, which we lucked out with since both sets of parents live close by

I don't get a lot of "your life is over" but I do get "your life will no longer be about you." I've seen my friends parent and I understand that. I don't think there is anything that anyone can say that will convince me and my husband to not have children. I think they will bring us more joy than struggle.

I have a different view on it I guess, because I did get a lot of the fun stuff out of my system before I finally did get married and pregnant. No one that is close to me would dare to tell me to enjoy my time without kids, honestly because I am an older first time mom.

Yes. Everyone continually tells me that I need to enjoy me and Mr. Bear before I have children. To me, life isn't over. A new chapter in life has just begun.

I find men like to say this a whole lot more than women. I don't understand it. It's like when people say your life ends when you get married. This is all part of life - why would you want to ruin someone's happiness and joy by telling them their life is over when these wonderful things are happening? Jealousy?

Yes, parenting CHANGES YOUR LIFE but it doesn't END it.

DH and I get that a lot. We're 22/23 and we've been married since June. We're going to start TTC in the Spring, but only close family knows. We live in a really rural area in the South and we are seriously the only couple 20+ years old that have no kids. It drives me NUTS because everyone tells us to "wait awhile," yet all the other young married people started having kids at 18.

We heard it all the time when I was pregnant and I kept thinking "It couldn't be that bad". Well, it wasn't that bad but it was pretty tough the first few months - you go from owning your own schedule to eating, sleeping (or rather not sleeping), and thinking baby 24/7. Shopping trips, dinners out, and simple errands become an exercise in precise timing and planning.

However, at about 8/9 months, the time between her nursings became longer, she was well-established on solids, dropped to 2 naps, and was able to entertain herself for short periods of time. It's was only then that her schedule was more manageable to where I felt comfortable leaving her for longer periods of time. Our lives aren't over but it definitely takes a lot more planning to be able to do things we used to spontaneously.

BTW, I'm guilty of telling other parents-to-be the same thing now. Not that it's the end of their life but that it's gonna be a tough first few months and that it does gets better. Oh, I also tell them that should watch as many movies in theaters that they want 'cause it's something I definitely miss doing - just doesn't make sense paying more for a babysitter than for the movie itself.

We use to get this a lot and I found it irritating. I think thats a dramatic statement and your averege logical person with a decent amount of common sense knows it is a life changing matter, but not life ending. I think its even MORE rude to say it to someone who is TTC or PG especially if the person who makes the comment knows that they are.

Well, I used to get this with my first baby. I had a whirlwind fairy tale romance with my husband and he even flew me to Paris to prospose in front of the Eiffel Tower! Cliche to some maybe but to me it was amazing! Everyone of my friends would tell me I hope you enjoyed it and Well, you won't be doing that anymore before Liam was born and it was so annoying. Then after he was born I realized how tough it really is and I get what they meant. It was difficult and especially with my husband traveling so often I ended up getting a nanny to help me and that was wonderful.

Now I get the opposite which is just as annoying. Some family members act as though I'm not really a mom at all and my nanny is and they will actually say Are you going to just get another nanny when this one is born? and things like that. Very rude.

It really irritates me when people say that. My friends who actually live in NYC don't say it so much because people seem to take their babies everywhere with them here. There are always tons of babies at dinners and in beer gardens etc.

Whenever peopple try to say that to me, I brush it off. I'm 32, I've done all the partying I need to and travelled endlessly. I'm good. I know year 1 will be a hostage situation, but after that I'm pretty sure we'll be okay. I just can't see myself never leaving the baby with someone to go out, it isn't who I am.