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I don't think I could ever ... I can't imagine not raising my own baby.

I wouldn't be able to give up my own baby (with my egg/my husband's sperm), but I would feel comfortable with being a surrogate... I think the "mine-ness" would prevent me from giving someone else my genetic baby.

Yeah I never could. When hubs and I were very young we discussed in advance that we would both be comfortable with an abortion if the unthinkable happened (but I was seriously insane about birth control so luckily we never had to face that decision). As soon as I graduated college and was earning a living I continued to be very vigilant about birth control but we both agreed that if we did get pregnant we would have the baby and keep it. Once I was a responsible adult who was supporting myself I couldn't imagine not taking responsibility for a pregnancy/child... planned or not. So I couldn't even give an unplanned baby up for adoption... nevermind getting pregnant with the intent of giving the baby away. That would be the most selfless gift I could imagine, and I guess I'm just not that selfless of a person!

@miss-spunkin: i am not sure why they kept it a secret but my friend was in his 20s when he finally found out that he had another brother. they did know each other but they thought they were just cousins.

I don't think I could do it either since you'll be bonding with the LO well before they arrive!

No I could never.

surrogacy and adoption are both such selfless acts. It takes a strong, loving person to do either. Both choices are very commendable.

That said: Would I ever allow someone to adopt my child on the sole basis that I had one, and they didn't? Absolutely not. But if I was a much younger me and was in a position to not give a child all the love and attention he deserved, then yes -- I would choose adoption.

I don't think I can ever give my child up for adoption no matter how young I was. But I think that's largely because I have a great family support system that I know no matter what would be there for me.

Surrogacy....I would consider doing it for siblings. But I don't know. Would we keep it a secret? If we did it won't be fair to the child. How can I look at that child every day and know it's MINE but pretend it's just a niece or nephew?

Nope.

I could never go through with either adoption or surrogacy; I think both are incredibly selfless acts, but knowing how difficult pregnancy is for me, I could never do go through with it if I didn't have the end result of a baby to look forward to.

I don't think I would have ever considered it until I became a part of the adoption triad. It is such a beautiful gift to give to someone. I don't know if I could go through with it-- certainly not at this point in my life, but if I had difficult socio-economic circumstances or was very young I'd like to think I'd consider it.... I am so thankful that our birth mother gave us such an amazing child!

Never.

Noway.

In the context that you described, no.. I would rather endure the weird feelings of carrying another couple's child than the sadness of giving them my own child. But had I been in high school or maybe even in the first couple years of college I always said I'd give the baby up if I ever got pregnant. I don't think you can really ever say for sure til you're in that position though.