My friend had asked me to babysit her two kids on Sunday while she and her husband went to an appointment. The first thing the younger one said when she walked in the house was "I'm real real sick." The older one then told me "Mommy and Daddy are sick too, only I'm not sick!" When I later told my friend about the comment she scoffed "she's not really sick....she's medium sick." I have a 2.5 year old and a 6 month old, my toddler is now sick, and I'm so annoyed. Am I wrong? When her daughter got sick should she have made other plans, or at least let me know? It's just a cold but he's miserable, cranky and weepy and can't sleep. And he's constantly all up in the baby's face so I'm sure that he's next.
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You're not wrong. That's super frustrating.
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You are not wrong! We have had this happen several times with my ILs and it is so frustrating.
I hope your LO feels better soon and baby doesn't catch it.
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That's SUPER frustrating. I'd have been mad that she didn't mention it, especially knowing that you've got young kids too.
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Nope I'd be very upset
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She definitely should have mentioned something, and given you a chance to back out!
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Not cool.
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No way, very bad form.
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I'd be pissed!!! And give her a piece of my mind!
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Not ok!!! I would be livid.
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She should have said something, especially since they were coming to your house. BUT I also think colds are just kind of par for the course with the toddler set. If it's just a runny nose I don't worry too much.
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I always let people know before a play date if LO or I are feeling sick - doesn't matter if we're planning to go to their house or they're coming over here. I always give the option to cancel and reschedule for another day. That being said no one has ever decided not to come over or told us not to come over.
I know most kids pass germs back and forth and if there's no fever or vomit then these kids would be allowed to go to daycare/school and play areas so in that way I do understand how some people don't really think a cold is a big deal. But I think it's just being courteous.
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@Foodnerd81: Yah I agree that colds aren't a huge deal for toddlers... but I wouldn't mess around with a 6mo's health!
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Uhh... guess I'll go against the grain and say I don't see this as a big deal?
When your kids are in daycare, they are pretty much sick all the time. If I kept my kids home when they were sick, we'd never go anywhere or do anything!
A heads-up would've been nice, but kids get colds all the time. I don't see it being that big of a deal.
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Not cool!
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With my friends, we automatically avoid contact with anything major and consult each other for anything more minor. We give details (cough but no fever, etc) and ask if the other party wants to reschedule.
I don't think it's okay for them to just come over without saying anything (even if you didn't have an infant, I would still think so).
Now that it has happened like this, you will have to speak up or else you'll always wonder what sickness they will bring to your kids. I'd probably say that your child is having a rough time of it and you are really afraid of the baby getting it. Ask them to tell you next time anyone is sick.
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I'd probably mention it if it was the first day or two of a cold and especially of the person's kids aren't in school/daycare. when we were in daycare, I always felt bad about spreading my kids daycare germs to kids that stayed home lol.
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In this specific case, knowing you have an infant at home, I would have said something upfront.
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@erinbaderin: that would really annoy me! We get enough crap from dd being in preschool.
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I always let people know if we are under the weather to give them an opportunity to change their plans.
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Yes I always say something b/c I'd want someone to do the same for me. Both my kids have colds now so I let our friend know and we've rescheduled our play date. I think a heads up is just common courtesy and its then up to the other person to decide if the illness is a big deal to them or not.
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I would be upset- the parents should have at least asked if it was OK for their sick kid to come over and play with/ infect your kids. I agree not every little sniffly nose is cause for concern, but "medium sick" for a toddler can easily translate to "pretty freaking sick" for a 6 mo baby!
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I would be annoyed. My friends and I would always give each other heads up over sick kids. Often no one would cancel for a cold, but it was nice to be asked. My family don't ever give heads up though. The reason why I think it matters is you just don't know if that other person needs to try and be healthy for some reason. For example, I have an elderly, frail grandparent and if my kids are sick I can't visit him. You can't always prevent your kids getting sick, but sometimes it's avoidable.
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A cold isn't a big deal to me. I would've likely given a heads up but I feel like.... kids are going to get cold regardless!
I hope your LO feels better soon and baby doesn't catch it.
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23 comments