Hellobee Boards

@cyndistar3: hey, me too!

@TurtleDoves: you're doing better than I am. I think shopping would be a great activity to do together.

If I knew, I would tell you the secret. Unfortunately, I'm cursed too....

Just put yourself out there. Go shopping with her! Think of a ton of topics to talk about before you go you're sweet and chatty, I think you'll be fine!!

@HLK208: I'm an introvert by nature but I try to be outgoing in social situations. However, I find myself feeling shy and saying really awkward things. I think I try to over compensate for my shyness. Usually gets me a lot of (what I feel are) awkward looks/laughs. Haha

Well, I talked to a chick at Target for 2 minutes yesterday. 10 minutes later she found me and asked for my number. She said she had no mommy friends, and was looking for some.

So, there's always that approach.

I think shopping is a good activity for awkward first friend dates. Lunch or dinner has so much pressure - you have to come up with conversation topics & make all kinds of eye contact. I think having the babes there will be a great way to break the ice.

If that fails, come to VA. I'll be your friend.

I am going through the same thing with a wife of one of DH's friends!! Our husbands both try to get us to go out but we are both so shy. And we always make fake plans when we are together but neither of us follow through with a phone call or anything. I wish I knew the secret so I could pass it along. I will say that I'm glad I'm not alone...I always thought I was some sort of social misfit for not being able to make friends so easily and being so shy.

I'd say just invite her out! Like pp have said, there are lots of distractions and things you could talk about at the mall. And if you bring your kids that is an automatic conversation starter! Hugs! Good luck! I'd totally be your friend if we lived in the same area.

To keep things safe, you could maybe mirror similar things to what she does... sit next to her at events, bring gifts for her LO, stuff like that!

Making friends is sooo hard!! I go back and forth thinking I have no friends to thinking I have a good amount of friends all the time.

I think you should just go for it and have lunch or shopping or a chick flick (?)with her one on one.

I'm fairly bad at it myself but have been getting out of my comfort zone some more lately and have been meeting some new people. A couple of other moms and I got together after a library class and now we get together every week. So it's not so bad once that initial hurdle is crossed. Go shopping together, like others said you can chat as you shop, stop for coffee or a quick bite and take it from there!

@TurtleDoves: I had to make all new mom friends when I stopped working to become a SAHM...and I will say most girls want so much to have a community of mom friends and are willing/open to work on developing a friendship.

I met a lot of mom friends at play gym, parent-tot swim, library storytime, and the children's museum. If I hit it off with a mom I would exchange numbers with her and either invite her along for another activity the following week (like splash park or a picnic at a playground) and soon enough we would be getting together several times a week.

If you think she's the type of new mom that wants/needs some child-free time then definitely ask her along for a shopping trip. I she's a relatively new first time mom (baby is less than 6 months old) I might offer having her over for a playdate and saying you want to order lunch or want an excuse to make a yummy brunch dish. Or offer to drop off a meal and visit with her if she's more the type to want to stay and let her baby nap. I would just feel her out and don't be afraid to put yourself out there. I know for me it was so nice having friends check in with a text every week or so just to see how things are going. Let her know you're so excited for her and her new baby and just show you care and she will be able to see you're making an effort and I'm sure she will reciprocate. It sounds like she's already trying to be your friend.

@.twist.: h hahaha! This is me around new people! Thank goodness my core group of girlfriends were all drunk in college when we were getting close knowing me I'd intend to offer to watch her LO so she could take a relaxing shower (new mom heaven!) and say "so do you wanna shower?" And accidentally make it sound like an invitation.

@TurtleDoves: mom dating is HARD. you know we just moved to a new town and we know one family but I'm having the same issue. I hate to bombard our old friends with hanging out constantly bc we don't know other people. Like other PPs said, ask her over for a meal, go shopping, offer to take her a meal. If all else fails, come back to kansas.

You have a very easy to get along with personality. She'll love you more than she already does. Now stop being stingy and start putting out the vibe:)

Just send her a text asking if she is free on X day for coffee, lunch, going shopping, a "play date", whatever. Then go! Simples!

Just remember, she is a new mum so she will be hoping for someone to spend time with who understands what she is going through. She has previously made the effort to show she likes you, so you know she would love to be your friend. Just think of it as you offering her the hand of friendship - what a lovely, generous gesture - as opposed to the other way around, you trying to make a friend. You've got a lot to offer a friend and here you are offering it all to her - lucky her!

Do it! Shopping will be easy. You will have lot of the random things to talk about like whether that shirt looks good or whatever. Think about some stuff that you'd like to know about her before you go. come up with some topics beforehand. people generally like to talk about themselves so if you ask her questions about herself and let her talk and then open up about yourself in return, it should be fine!

I'll be your friend!!! :). I think inviting her shopping is a good idea. Or maybe dinner so your husband can be your buffer?

@TurtleDoves: is it sad that every time I see this thread pop up I start singing teach me how to dougie in my head? Maybe it's a sign that you should invite her to a dance party! Haha

@TurtleDoves: too bad. Maybe the chicken dance instead?

This reminds me of the movie "I love you, man"! However, I do not know how to ask a friend out without it being awkward. I don't even know how to start a conversation without saying something ridiculously stupid and lame! Good luck