Hellobee Boards

So this is a long response because we just went through this. DS1 is 3.5 years old and my more high strung child. His room is directly across from our 21 month old, who just passes out at bedtime.

One thing that has really helped DS1 is sensory deprivation. Always has. He has always had white noise and blackout curtains and slept in a pitch black room. And prior to the bed conversion, he actually slept in a Privacy Pop tent as a floor bed. He really loved it. But DS2 will need it soon and we knew he needed to move to a real bed at some point, so we bit the bullet recently.

When we transitioned to a big boy bed, it was like, everything was too open, everything was accessible and he couldn't shut his brain off to just lay there and go to sleep. He wanted to switch the lights on and off, get in and out of bed, turn OFF his white noise machine, look out the window, etc.

Our solution has been an Ikea Kura bed with the house bed tent that goes on top of it. Its like a covered wagon over his bedframe. Don't as me WHY making a tent/cave thing helps, but its been enormously helpful. He used to mess around requiring us to go back in there multiple times until like 1030pm like you, but now he's usually asleep by about 830pm, 9 on a bad night. Our monitor has a speaker function where we can talk to him through the camera, so we just bark at him to go to sleep and he complies.

As to the diaper thing, our son is day trained but sleeps in a pull-up because that night-wetting enzyme hasn't kicked in for him yet so he wakes up wet about half the time. The problem for us was that he REALLY disliked pooping in his pull-up and as soon as he did (usually mid-nap or early in the morning), he would start freaking out. At the very least he was up for good. At the very worst, he was pulling off his pull-up and making a HUGE mess. But he for sure cannot handle the freedom to roam to the bathroom by himself at night or otherwise.

So we installed what we jokingly call the "prison toilet" in his room. Our son does not like little kid potties and prefers the adult toilets, so we got this potty that looks like a real toilet for his bedroom. It even makes a flushing noise.

http://a.co/7U7QOY7

We put it on top of a puppy pad and told him if he needs to use the potty when he's in his room, he can go ahead and try. If he needs help or needs us to wipe him, he can yell help and we'll hear him (either over the monitor or just in general we can always hear him because he's loud AF). After a few days of being intrigued, but unsure, he was totally on board. Now if he needs to poop, he just goes and then either goes back to sleep or he just quietly plays in his room. He's recently also started to try wiping himself (we keep wipes next to the potty), so that's pretty neat. We just kept repeating that we had to leave our pull-up on and that we don't touch the poop and yell for mommy and daddy to come help. (Except he doesn't - he just poops and carries on with his life).

We tried installing a touch light on to his wall for him to use to see the toilet by but he was just turning it on and off all night so we got rid of it and installed this projector nightlight:

http://a.co/h4pcVMq

It makes a very clear, fun image on the wall or ceiling, but its actually not very bright of a light. It creates just enough of a glow to see to his potty, but especially with his tent, it doesn't keep him awake. He likes to lay in his bed and open his tent and peek at his Paw Patrol friends and then go back to sleep.

We childproofed and removed everything in his room aside from some mentally stimulating toys/games. He has a few books to choose from, a small set of Paw Patrol figurines he can make believe with, and like one puzzle or memory card matching game. If he wakes early he just gets up and starts playing one of those things and we don't really hear a peep out of him until we get him.

We do have a doorknob cover on his knob so he doesn't wander around the house bugging his brother or getting into trouble. He hasn't really fought that with us.

When bedtime gets out of control, we try a “reset” with 3ish days of melatonin. I get the Ozzzz brand on Amazon. They usually help my son fall asleep in 10-15 minutes.

@Mrs.Someone: Ooo good idea!

@peachykeen: This blanket trick is also a great idea! I’m saving these tips!

Have you tried moving her bedtime later?

Is she still napping? My daughter dropped her nap at 3.5 and it helped sleep at night much better

My first dropped the nap at 2.5 and it cut the bedtime awake time from 30-60 minutes down to 5-15 and moved bedtime an hour earlier. Downside....no more naps.