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Personally, I wasn’t ready to leave any of my babies overnight until much closer to two (or even three!) so I say bring her along!

You shouldn’t feel bad wanting to take her and they shouldn’t feel bad wanting to leave their babies at homes. Since you have the option since the wedding is baby/ kid friendly do what’s best for your comfort and your baby girl that nurses. I’m assuming a bottle of breast milk is not a decent substitute. I didn’t nurse as long as you, but I pumped quite a bit in the beginning and LO would take a bottle with no problem.

1) A night away without a baby, with your husband & friends is going to be very refreshing for you. I highly recommend it for your mental health.

2) Baby will be fine with a babysitter. She may even sleep through the night, knowing that you are not around. If she wakes up, your sister will feed her and snuggle her and put her back down.

3) Bring whatever pump is the easiest. If you are not saving the milk, then just pump as you normally would and dump it. One day away will not affect your supply, so either pump the normal amount or just enough to feel relief.

4) If you are really struggling with leaving the baby, bring her AND your sister. Then you can have fun, but sister can leave with baby whenever is necessary.

I say don't feel bad either way. Do what YOU are comfortable with; everyone has different comfort levels and their babies are different.

If you bring her, you def will "miss out" on some of the fun as your other friends aren't planning to bring their kids. I'm thinking you'd either have to bow out pretty early for bed time, or you/DH will babywear her the whole time, which allows you to stay but restrict you really dancing around?

And if you don't, I'd take great comfort that your sister will be watching her. I have a stage 5 clinger that still nurses (she is almost 2), and honestly when I'm not home she does so much better. Yes, your sister may have to hold her more or rock her more, but I do think they will both be fine. Maybe you can keep up the gentle sleep training and your sister can continue it.

@jennlin821: all of this! I’m team “leave baby” all the way. It’s so good for me/DH when we get some time away from the kids. The worst part is honestly the anxiety and guilt leading up to it. But then once we’re gone, and we see/hear that everything is fine, we are so glad we did it.
And yeah, at this stage one night won’t kill your supply.
HAVE FUN!

Don't feel bad about not wanting to leave her. I wasn't away from my oldest overnight until she was 20 months, and lo2 was about 15m--and those were for work trips where I had to go (and I was still nursing both times; w lo1 I tried to wean w the trip so didn't pump, but then she wanted to nurse immediately when I came home; with lo2 I pumped and brought the milk home). We have a wedding we were invited to out of town in November and I might not go bc we can't figure out a sitter either in our home city to watch them overnight or in the city where we're going, and our kids will be 4.5 and 21m; I still hate the idea of both of us being away from them! Not lo1 as much--she has "sleepovers" now with grandparents occasionally and loves them, although the only time we've both been away from her for more than that was just when lo2 was born and we were at the hospital. But lo2 is still such a baby even though she's not....

@mrsbubbletea: I wonder if it would be harder for her to be away from home and brother too. Can they both just stay home and auntie/uncle can come over to help out as needed?

On the flip side, I think if you bring her, you just have to make sure you and DH are okay with whatever you might miss out on, and that's the trade off for having her with you too.

I'm sorry it's such a hard decision! Personally, I would have brought mine so that A) it's easier for grandparents to just deal with 1 kid and B) My DH is super introverted so he'd be more than happy to stay back at the hotel BUT the only minus is if I'm actually out having fun at a wedding I'd want him to be there, someone to dance with, etc.

@mrsbubbletea: you could buy a cheap manual pump, not open the box, and return it if you don’t need it. That way you have peace of mind in case your old pump breaks- which I highly doubt it would. And I found a manual pump surprisingly helpful for random times- like baby slept much long than usual at night, I could quickly pump a little to relieve the pain and go back to sleep, or for one night away when I didn’t want to bring the big electric pump.

For one night away I would definitely want to leave the baby at home. For two, I understand your hesitation, but as long as your sister understands the nights might be tough, I would still want to get away.

At over a year old, I would leave baby at home and enjoy some adult time. It’s such a short period of time. Baby will be fine. Caretaker will be fine. And some adult time will rejuvenate you!