My 5 year old started a transitional kindergarten class this year. She’s always been a spirited child, at home and increasingly at school. This year, apparently she is really having trouble with one particular boy, L. There have been hitting and pushing incidents (from both of them) and verbal fights. I know the teacher is on top of it and aware that these two kids tend to butt heads and she does her best to redirect before it gets to that point, and she is working with me and with L’s parents on behavior issues (separately). I also have seen this kid at a party and he’s rambunctious, but I don’t think he’s actually mean. So, the situation kind of sucks but I think we are all dealing with it as well as we can.

My question is more about her attitude towards this kid. I had told her if she has a problem with L, just play with someone else, no problem. But now she’s saying she doesn’t like L, she hates L. I don’t quite know how to explain that there will always be people you like more than others but you have to be nice to everyone, or how to encourage her to just not be too close to this kid without her turning it into excluding this kid. Advice on how to deal with this kind of situation?