My 14 month old son is not responsible for this, I am. I always would just give him what he wants wen he fussed or anticipate and offer him a million things. He is a bit behind in the language department so I have started to make him ask me for things more but now he usually points with his hands and fusses or screams loudly. I can't get him to sign for kill or more because he wants to fuss instead but he will do these things when he isn't in dire desire for something. As I see his cryog escalate I realize I may be teaching him to fuss uncontrollablyor melt down to get what he wants if I don't give in right away but I also don't want to give in too soon. I know most people say to use the actual words and not baby talk to teach baby to respond correctly but that's not working for my son and adds to his frustration. What has worked for me is teaching him to use his babble as communication. So Nananana has now become "I want" or "please help". It's helping him to fuss less and communicate more. He does it to have me read him stories and help him and get him things. I guess my question is this: am I setting him back in language by doing this in the place of using real words? I see so many toddlers his age who nod or point for things quietly but this is not him. He fusses or grunts loudly. If this isn't a good tactic can you make some suggestions? I am desperate to get him to fuss less for things.
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My 17 month old usually whines for what he wants (unless it is "up" or "eat") so I usually just ask him a series of "do you want" or "would you like" and probably around 16 months he started nodding yes (previously he could only nod no). It's a long process but it seems to be getting better.
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i don't think it has anything to do with you asking him to sign. my 14 month old is similar in that if he doesn't realllllllly want something i can get him to say "please" (he's just copying me) but if he's in tantrum mode, there's no way he'll say it, he'll just cry/scream harder.
the same thing if he wants to be picked up. if we're just playing around and i said "say up" he'll say "uhh" (his way of saying up) but if he really really wants/needs to be picked up he just fusses more and more.
so i think it's just typical toddler behavior.
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I make it a point to use words at all times, especially when my son is frustrated.
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I think as long as you are using the correct words and when you figure out what he wants repeating what the correct word is, then you'll be okay. Example: when he is whining and fussing and you know he wants your help, you could say "would you like momma's help? What can I get for you? Do you want a XYZ?" without much pause between questions since you know he isn't going to respond and just get more upset.
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4 comments