Hellobee Boards

Maybe sometime in the distant future, but in our current political climate if anyone proposed paid (or unpaid) maternity leave of any length; the idea would be called out as just another "entitlement program" for lazy mothers who don’t want to work.

I would like to see you guys get in the not-so-distant future (when i was a baby it was 6 months and now its a year, so there's hope!) but that "lazy/entitled mentality" thread makes me think you have quite a ways to go yet. IMHO, of course.

@mediagirl: I think she has a point, to be fair. I know that in the UK maternity leave is a topic of hot debate given that their economy, like ours, is stretched thin. And I have read more than a few articles from their papers contesting that women are having children to avoid work. It's sad, but true. And of course, yes, there might be a tiny minority of women who do exactly that. But it's sad that people hang on to those few examples as reason to do away with generous leave.

I don't think so . . . but I hope so for my DD's sake.

@YourSilverLining: I understand your skepticism, but there was plenty of opposition to *Obama Care* and it was still passed. (FTR, I disagree wholeheartedly with *how* it was passed, but I agree wholeheartedly that it should have been passed/access to medical care should not be a luxury!)

I don't think we'll see it in the near future, sadly.

I think the kicker is that lots of women don't get ANY portion of maternity leave paid. Instead, they have to accumulate paid time off, vacation time, or disability time. This seems very wrong to me.

My office offers 8 weeks paid and up to 6 months total (unpaid). It's a great benefit and I took advantage of it.

@meredithNYC: It was intense before HB Gold's announcement, now it's just petty and annoying! It's 60 degrees today, so i'm totally good over here

I don't think it will change in my child-bearing years, but I hope for my future daughter/DIL that there is a better maternity/paternity leave policy in place.

I hope so, but I doubt it. So sad

@yoursilverlining: I agree.

I don't see maternity leave ever changing for the better in this country. I think the few companies that offer paid or extended leave will slowly dwindle.

@winniebee: I wish I had fond memories of my maternity leave. The last couple of weeks were made horrible by my MIL's disastrous visit and finding a daycare at the same time. I guess I'm still resentful of how his family visited for 2 whole weeks in my short maternity leave, one of them being on my total PTO time. I worked up until the day I delivered, so my PTO was hard earned. That was totally lost on my MIL.

@winniebee: She's especially "helpful." Her visit was the showdown that was poised to happen eventually where she finally figured out that I don't want the type of relationship she wants. She just happened to do it on my maternity leave. After the big fight, she spent all of her time in his nursery, like camped out. So ridiculous. After that, I was more than ready to return to work and not be in my own home for an extended period of time.

@CascadeMom @WinnieBee: Yeah . . . *helpful*. My mom didn't appreciate how stressful the end of my pregnancy was. She actually flew in almost week before I told her she could (during my last week in the office), and planned to stay for much longer than we had discussed (we discussed 2 weeks, she booked her return ticket for a month after her arrival). They didn't end up staying that long (that is a story for another time ), but O-M-G it was uber stressful! (I literally left my office on a Friday afternoon for an OB appointment, and during the appointment, was sent to L&D to be induced.)

My mom had *no* appreciation for the fact that I only got 12 weeks of maternity leave (6 paid, 6 unpaid), and that I wanted to maximize time with my LO because I would have to return to work so soon.

I agree that it would just be seen as an entitlement program too. Unfortunately, factions within our government are trying to cut all sorts of social programs so proposing another one seems like a disaster.

I do think it needs to be done though. Even a program like the UK or Canada, where the mother only makes a percentage of her salary, is better than nothing at all. I don't think it will be within our generation that we see it happen.

@MsLipGloss: Aww hugs! My parents really respected our need for space, etc. They would visit on Wednesdays and do laundry while I showered and ate. My inlaws, not so much. That same awful MIL visit she went out to dinner with my DH on her last night, leaving me and the baby at home to fend for myself. She did laundry one day after the big fight at 10-11pm at night with the lights all on. No wonder the baby didn't sleep well with that. By the time she left, I had a full basket of laundry to do. Oh yeah, she washed her clothes but none of mine.

I think there's a general misunderstanding about how maternity leave is funded in Canada (can't speak for other countries, as I'm not familiar with their systems) that leads it to being seen as an "entitlement program."

Employed Canadians (those who are employed by outside agencies, the rules have changed somewhat for self-employed individuals, but I don't think they are the same) are required to contribute to Employment Insurance. That means that a deduction is taken off every single pay cheque and it goes into the EI pot (obviously a very simplistic explanation, but you get what I mean). If we lose our jobs or want to take maternity leave, we can then draw on that money in order to have some income. The income is nominal - 55% of your salary to a maximum of $501/week, less taxes. So it's not that the government has a huge pot of money that they're doling out to mothers - it's essentially a tax (and yes, the issue of taxation is a whole other contentious issue that I'm not even going to get into here) to which we've contributed and then are drawing back on. Further, you have to work a minimum number of hours before you qualify. I suppose the argument can be made that those who don't have children are helping pay the way of those of us who do, and while that's true, it's also a matter of personal choice, as well as our society's socialist bent, which recognizes the value of contributing to the "greater good."

Some employers do then pay additional money in order to "top up" their employee's salaries - for example, my employer tops my salary up to 95% for the first 17 weeks of my leave and for the remaining 35 weeks I'll receive the $501/week - but they are not in any way bound to.

I think certain companies will begin offering better maternity benefits, the way Google does now, when they see the benefit to them-- it costs them less to give a good employee a few extra months off than the recruit, hire, and train a new employee. I think it would be a bonus perk that would help entice qualified candidates, like really good health insurance and vacation time.

I don't see any government program getting much better for a while. It just doesn't go with our current way of doing things and too many people would balk. My current policy is pretty good by US standards-- 2 weeks before due date, 6 or 8 weeks after, all paid, then I can start my 12 weeks unpaid FMLA-- so I technically could take 20 weeks off.

Wow @foodnerd81, that mat leave is very generous! Lucky you!

It would be nice if just the 12 weeks would be standard and you could get the 66% pay that most short term disability offers. That would be a start!

I don't know what would have to change (besides the law, of course) to get better mat leave but I'm like most of you saying I don't see it happening for us!

Probably not anytime soon.

I think it would be a positive step forward if women were able to take a period of unpaid time off without having to leave their jobs. In NZ the Government pays a nominal amount for fourteen weeks and my employer has to hold my position open pretty much until my LO turns one.

I believe that having children is a choice but no Mother should be forced to return to work after just four or six weeks because that's not good for anybody!