Yesterday Avery said, "I want your eyes. I need scissors to get your eyes".
I think I'll feel more confident that my toddler doesn't actually want to cut my eyes out of my head if I hear some creepy things your LO has said to you!
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I love these posts, they always make me laugh
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@tlcbaby: ha!
" I'm going to be a big brother. My baby doesn't have arms, or legs, or a head!"
(We were explaining baby was a ball of cells earlier, this is how he told grandpa...) -
@pastemoo: That is funny! I hope I remember these things to tell him when he gets older.
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One time I accidentally sneezed close to my daughter's face and she said,
Oooh yummy. I want to drink from your nose.
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Walking through Target she sees the book "I'll love you forever".
She asks "Mommy is this where you got that potty book?"
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We've been teaching her that the new baby is in mommy's tummy and she has to be careful and gentle around it. Somehow that has turned into "We don't smash the baby!" I mean, it's true too.
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@Foodnerd81: whenever we cross the street my LO yells "cars! Don't smash us!!!" I have no clue where she even learned the word "smash" never mind that context.
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@T.H.O.U.: Ha ha! D once saw a manual pump in the breastpump aisle at Target and yelled, "Look, Mommy, a baby horn!" There was woman walking by with a newborn in her cart who just burst out laughing.
The other day D asked if he could go into my belly and take baby sister out.
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He will sometimes put his arm out and act like someone's pulling him across the room and say, "He's taking me! He's taking me away!"
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@Truth Bombs: yeah I have no idea where she learned the term smash either!
@travellingbee: that is pretty creepy!
I forgot, sometimes she will just stare at the air a few feet in front of her face and reach out to it like she is holding a ghost or angels hand or something. No idea what she's doing but it looks kinda creepy.
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Ummm yeah that would be last night when DH was out all night at a business meeting and we were home alone. We were skyping with my Mom when LO started talking about the person at the door. And the person in the backyard. And she was tracking things with her eyes and saying "What is that person doing? I'm scared, pick me up" for a good like, 15 minutes.
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Lately my little guy has been saying "Joseph lives in our house."
1. we dont know anyone named Joseph
2. strange things have happened in our house, not creepy really, just strange.
3. when I ask who Joseph is he giggles and shakes his head. -
DD has 'understood' pregnancy pretty well, knows there's a baby in my tummy, will sing to baby, etc....one day i had cramps and I told her my tummy hurts, she comes over, puts a hand on my belly, and says "aww, baby is gone".
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@ksnow: that's so freaky! DS said the same thing to me once and I was so upset. So I ask him what he means and he says "my baby's gone, daddy's baby's gone, only mommy's is still in tummy!" Turns out he thought the whole family has babies in tummies seeing as DH and DS both have a bit of a pot belly
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@travellingbee: can't decide if this makes me want to cry or laugh!!
my girl says some off the wall stuff but she's more about just jumbling ideas together and finding herself hilarious? he creepiest thing I EVER heard someone else's kid say though has to be that line from silence of the lambs. puts the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again! NOPE.
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Not too long ago she told me if she cut my head off I would have zero heads! I think it was more of a counting thing, but still creepy!
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@travellingbee: Okay that would scare me! Sometimes Avery says "Don't get that guy over there. Just go." And I'm thinking, don't worry---I won't be letting any strange guys into the car.
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@rosegold: I would call in an exorcist.
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@JoJoGirl: My sister's son has claimed to see people at their house before. I hope Avery never sees anyone in our house!
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oh my gosh, some of these are hilarious and others so creepy!
lo is only 18 months so hasn't said anything too outrageous/out of context, though the other day dh was changing her diaper and said "is R stinky?" and she said, "no," so he said "is daddy stinky?" she said no, and then he said "who's stinky?" and she goes "MAMA'S STINKY!" I wasn't even in the room, lol.
also, the way she says "fox" sounds exactly like the f-word, and also the way she says both "duck" and "quack" sounds like cock...some of our family members have definitely done double takes when she's said those!
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@tlcbaby: Oh this is an on-going issue. We actually had a medium come to clear the house once already, ha ha. She (the medium) told us my LO is 'connected' to spirits so we'd likely be dealing with it for a while. Last night was just the creepiest so far, probably because I was home alone!
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@JoJoGirl: How have you not moved? I would be so freaked out!
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@Smurfette: Because 1) we just got here and this is our dream house and 2) I think it's HER, not the house. That's what the medium told us. The house is new construction, we are the first residents! She's the one who is drawing these things to her.... moving wouldn't fix it.
And yeah last night I basically wanted to die I was so scared. Only helped that my mom suggested perhaps she saw our relatives/friends who'd passed and wanted to help me deal with my m/c/TTC. My (passed) grandmother has made an appearance in a weird way in our house before, so I just went with that explanation!
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@JoJoGirl: I forgot your house is new construction. So creepy!
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@Smurfette: YUP
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@JoJoGirl: that explanation would make me feel better. I freak out all the time about being home with LO and no DH. You would think that I would be used it to since it is almost every week, but nope. So glad we have an alarm.
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DD1 told me "when <DD2> gets five years old, she can go back in your belly til she grows more bigger".
Um, pregnant with a five year old?! For how long?! No thanks!!
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This might be totally inappropriate.....but I got a bikini wax and the waxist accidentally gave me a Brazilian. When my 3yo saw me going to the bathroom (privacy people!) he said "Wait! Wait! I want to see your new penis!" Then "Your new penis makes me nervous." O.M.G.
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@JoJoGirl: wooooah. Creepy!!
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@winniebee: OMG HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA. That is actually the funniest thing I think I have ever read.
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@winniebee: Hahahahahaa I'm dying. Lol
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@winniebee: dying!!
my daughter's said quite a few. I may come back and delete this one later, but she walked in on DH getting in the shower once and legit screamed. then she pointed and yelled, "A BIG POOP!!!" - I laughed so hard I cried. Ugly laugh face.
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@sorrycharlie: hahahh omg. The couple of times LO has caught DH naked she just points and asks, "WHAT'S DAT, DADDY?!?!"
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@JoJoGirl: she busted into the bathroom the other day (new house and the ONLY door he hasn't gotten around to installing a lock on!) and asked if he had a front bum, hahaha!
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@sorrycharlie: Bahah. DH has LO every morning so she sees him showering (glass door, no curtain) - at some point we'll have to troubleshoot that..
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@winniebee: lol!
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@JoJoGirl: nope nope nope nope nope. We had some poltergeist things happening in our house and I nearly lost my shit. I hung a cross in all the bedrooms and all the creepy shit stopped.
I don't know if I'm thankful or more creeped out.
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These are all so funny!!!!!
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@Mrs. Jump Rope: Hahahhah. I told myself last night I would NOT freak out unless lights and TVs started blinking.
And yeah last night I basically wanted to die I was so scared. Only helped that my mom suggested perhaps she saw our relatives/friends who'd passed and wanted to help me deal with my m/c/TTC. My (passed) grandmother has made an appearance in a weird way in our house before, so I just went with that explanation!
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