What is your opinion on grandparents watching grandkids?
Do you think that grandparents should? Should want to? Is it cultural for you?
My mom is the kind of grandma that watched my nieces and nephews. Up until my brother #2 moved out for the first year of their life she watched niece #1 and nephew #1 all day. She now watches niece #1 daily, drops her off at school and picks her up etc. Even though brother #2 has moved out he drops both nephews off often on weekends and she has no qualms watching them all day. They also sleepover often.
She feels HORRIBLE that she can not do the same for our daughter. But she is coming when baby arrives for 2-3 months to help out. Which we are SO appreciative of! But this was something that came with the decision of staying upstate in lieu of moving back to NYC, where my family is.
We're Chinese and even though culturally grandmas watch grandkids I think in this generation it is not the case any more. My mom is truly a gem!
She is convinced that my ILs will want to watch our baby!!! She was shocked to hear that my MIL will not be coming to stay with us to watch the baby for us since she is retired. And that we will be putting baby in daycare. She thinks that we should ask my ILs when they move back if they want to watch their granddaughter.
Here's the thing. My MIL while a wonderful woman is not cut from the same cloth as my mom. I'm not sure she would want to watch our baby. Not because she doesn't love her but I think that's just too much work for her! Even now living literally 5 mins away from BIL she does not watch their other two granddaughters. Even though that was their whole plan when they decided to move down there.
Granted our (my husband and I's) relationship with my ILs are very different than BIL and his ex-wife's with my ILs. As in much better. For this same reason my mom thinks that they will want to watch our child even though they do not watch their other two granddaughters. We can gander a guess as to why they are not watching their kids.
So this long winded post is to ask what are your feelings on grandparents watching grandkids if they lived nearby?
Would you ever ask your parents or ILs to watch your kids in lieu of sending them to daycare/nanny?
My husband and I both agree we would NOT ask them to watch baby unless they bring it up! Even though my mom thinks we should bring it up because what if they want to but don't want to bring it up in case they think we do not want them to watch baby? haha.