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My parents did, but they live in town and my are regular childcare and take my kids overnight about once a month for date nights. And even then, it definitely wasn't a full nursery--just a pack and play and now bunk beds, with a few supplies (diapers, wipes, etc.) In your situation, it would totally weird me out, too!

I know a few grandparents who have full nursery's at their houses - full cribs/beds with wooden cutouts with names hanging over them. My initial reaction is that I am so very jealous. I wish I had someone in my family willing to watch my kids so much that they set up a room for them. Our families watch my two girls, but its always a bit of a hassle, one way or another. So I wish someone would take them over night. What a dream! At the same time, I wish it was my own mom who would do that. I would be less thrilled if it was my MIL. But, despite the status of my relationship with my MIL, I would still be happy to have the help. I would retain control over how much I sent my kids over to my MILs house. So just because she set up the room, its not like my kids will be living over there. It would be like one night a month for a date night. And I'd be over prompt in the morning (after I slept in... what a dream) to get them. My own mom, I'd be happy for her to have my kids for an entire weekend! One can dream..

My mom and stepdad didn't do a full nursery but they did buy a fair amount. We would visit at least 10 times a year for 4-12 days at a time. They started with a pack n' play but then found a very simple crib at a consignment store and switched to that with an inexpensive mattress. It was just tucked into a corner of their guest room. They also had a keekaroo changing pad (so they could put it away when we weren't there), a collapsible jumperoo, a highchair, cups/utensils/plates/bowls, and a variety of toys. It was so wonderful to have so many things there when we would visit BUT we knew we would be going a lot and my mom talked with me about each purchase.

If my in laws had purchased as much it probably would have weirded me out though. It's just not the type of relationship we have with them.

My parents made a mini nursery in the corner of a spare room at their house when I was pregnant with LO1 (proper crib, a bit of storage, nursery themed art, etc). They have our kids sleep over every month or so and keep our kids overnight for a few days every year or so. It makes sense for us (and makes it so much easier to go to their house).

My parents also have a ton of books and toys from my childhood and the crib is now a toddler bed for my niece.

However, I don’t understand why your in-laws are creating a full nursery for you when you live so far away and won’t be visiting regularly.

I voted "other." They don't have an actual room converted to a nursery, but they are fully stocked. They have a pack n play, exersaucer, playmat, swing, changing area, diapers, wipes, a variety of baby and toddler/prek toys, sippy cups, etc.

We spend a fair amount of time at my in laws though (they live about 30 minutes away) and we see them sometimes multiple times a week. They also watch our kids overnight and my SIL comes into town about every other month and has a one year old. My other SIL doesn't have kids yet but it planning on multiple. Also, most of their stuff is hand me downs or consignment or I send toy overflow to their house. It's really nice for us because I can basically go there for the day and don't really have to haul anything BUT our kids. Your situation sounds different and seems a bit excessive to me. Do you think your MIL is hoping you'll be visiting more often? She might just be excited though, especially if this is her first grandchild. I understand why your SIL would be mad though!

@Foodnerd81: Agreed. If MIL asks for suggestions, give helpful ones that you think would really be used. But it’s also her house. If she wants to buy an expensive crib or something you don’t think will ever get used, oh well! It’s not your job to tell her what to put in her own home. If she’s not open to your input, you just have to let it go.

My MIL made a nursery at her house for us, complete with a crib, changing pad, and a comfortable chair. We aren’t there a ton, but it is nice to have everything available. We also bought her a small high chair, and it’s nice to not have to worry about bringing the basics with us. Edited to add that she got the crib for free from a friend of hers, and she already owned the chair, so she didn’t go crazy spending money.

My parents have a pack and play permanently set up in their guest room, and they own a high chair as well. Mine also have car seats and strollers, but we live close enough to them that I’ll sometimes just go over for the day. Both sets of parents also have kids cups, plates, silverware, bath towels, toys, etc. I have to say that it’s SO nice!

It does seem excessive to set up an entire nursery when you aren’t there much at all, but my guess is she is just super excited.

My parents have used the same crib and high chair for all 4 of their grandkids and just keep them stored when not in use. They have not set up an actual nursery. My MIL borrowed a few things from her niece who had a baby a few years ago but not a pack n play/crib so we do still travel with that and we see her once a month or so.

My m bought a pack n play, car seat, high chair, learning tower,play house, and a toy chest full of toys. I judge,but it's a good compromise because her first choice would be to buy everything for our house.

My MIL bought a new crib for her first grandchild. The only one to have ever used it was #11 about 16 years later for a nap. She also has a fair number of toys she's saved and a high chair. And car seats in her van.

Honestly, I'd say to skip the crib and ask for her to get a car seat, especially if you fly.

My MIL did, but she watched one of my nephews (same age as my DS) at least twice a week when he was a baby, and then his little brother, so it wasn’t weird. We actually moved in with them for 9 months when my DS was just over a year old, so it was nice that she already had everything. Maybe it’s a little strange since you don’t see her often, but I wouldn’t overthink it too much, she’s probably just excited to have a grand baby.

In-laws are close by (one hour away) and they got a packnplay, high chair, plastic dishes, toys, etc which changed as the kids have aged.

What I don't get is they live in a 4 bedroom house, none of the kids live at home anymore but we all visit and DS has stayed over for the weekend several times, and every time he just stays in their room... Not one of the 3 other rooms! I kind of wish they had turned one of the other rooms into a "kid" room but maybe someday.

I think a full nursery is overboard, but probably will turn into a full kids room which is awesome.

In a strange way I feel sorry for your MIL... She probably is expecting her world will change completely and she will see the baby a lot... and she is going to be so sad when the crib will be used once (or twice). Babies grow up so quickly, they won't be sleeping in a crib that long. But yes, I am with you, I'd feel weird too.

In a way it'd make more sense if she creates a kid's room... that would last at least 10 years.... a nursery lasts ... hmm... 1 year.

I do have to say, while my mom or my ILs didn't get a full nursery, they did buy things that makes absolutely no sense when you think logically. My FIL bought a tricycle when we visited years ago. DS was too young for it. ILs are in a different country and 4 hours of plane ride from us, we are not in a good relationship (he can not make it more obvious that I am not a part of the family amongst other things), so we visit them very very rarely. Ended up I don't even think DS ever used the tricycle. It is just their very intense love for your child shown physically - they don't know how else to express their love. I just have to remind myself that when DS have a family and have a baby I can't be doing that myself.

I think it's sweet. Neither my parents nor my in-laws have an official room set up as a nursery but both sets have a high chair, crib, baby toys, baby feeding supplies, etc. It's so great not to have to lug stuff back and forth. I think it is sweet that she is already planning to take an active role as a grandparent. The crib my mom bought has already been used on at least 9 babies (my own, my sibling's, my cousin's, lent out to others, etc.).

My MIL had a room for our nephews when they were little and she did the same thing in their new house for my boys. She started with a crib and changing table then added a toddler bed and 2 booster seats at the dining table. Honestly she keeps them a good bit and it makes it very nice when we go to visit that I don't have to bring as much with me.

My parents live farther away and we only go there 1-2 times a year but both have a booster seat/high chair, pack n plays and toys. My Dad even bought an extra car seat because he likes to drive my older LO around.

I can understand why you feel overwhelmed by this - I think whether or not it's creepy depends on your MIL's personality. Mostly I think it's super sweet and well intended - it shows her excitement. And she's probably planning it as a "grandkids room" for all future grandkids. She may cool it when she realizes how expensive a project it is to fully outfit a nursery!

I totally get your weird feelings about this even though I also think it’s well meaning. It’s funny your line about “like it’s her baby” because my MIL always does this thing when she holds a baby where she tucks them inward and walks out of the room and it always bugs me, like she is abducting my baby - 7+ years into parenting and still makes me feel weird! My MIL did not buy a ton for her own house because they have too much clutter to add anything, but she went crazy buying clothes and toys and such for a long time. It was her love language. It is definitely not mine, but it’s a good exercise in letting things go - my mom actually has way more gear but it doesn’t bother me because even though we only visit there 3 times a year, it all gets good use then (and most is picked up used).

Neither my parents nor in-laws did this, but mil bought a pack and play, and my mom would always borrow one and borrow car seats from my brother in advance of our visit so we wouldn't need to bring it, and she bought an inflatable toddler bed...but not a whole room! also my parents and in-laws have downsized since we've had kids, so having a full kid-room in an apt when it's only used a couple times per year is an excessive use of space!

No, but both sets of grandparents bought a crib so we wouldn’t have to lug ours every time.

@bees_knees: haha been there ... my MIL is still bitter I think that she has to “share” DH with me ... I always think in my head she wants to get rid of me and take my place