Backstory: When DS was born, DH was too busy trying to get the master bedroom redone for DS and I to come home that I barely saw him for half a month. Since it was my first child and I was emotionally all over the place after giving birth, this was not a good thing for either of us. He felt guilty for not being around and even though I was surrounded by friends and family, I felt somewhat abandoned. Logically he was doing what he needed to get us home but the hormones… well…

Here's the problem: I'm due any day now. As in I could go into labor tonight and my doctor wouldn't be at all surprised. We're supposed to sign on our new-old house Wednesday afternoon at 1:00. That means that there's a good chance that some time during the move, I'm going to go into labor. The problem is where I'm going to stay once the baby is born.

While we're at the hospital, DS (13 months old ) will be staying with my parents at their house. This is because my ILs can more easily visit him at my parent's house than my parents can visit him at my ILs house. My ILs have a cat and my dad is allergic. Add to that the fact that my parent's house is closer to the hospital I'll be delivering at than my ILs house? It just makes more sense in terms of him visiting and being visited.

Naturally, you would think I would go to my parent's house with the new baby then, right? Right. Not so, apparently. Both of my parents work during the day and there's a concern that after I'm released from the hospital, I'll be unable to take care of both DS and LO while we adjust - or at least initially. Once I get my strength back and into the swing of things, no one doubts that I'll be able to handle them both. The solution is to have my MIL help out. This in itself is the most logical choice, since she doesn't work, but I hate the idea. I don't want her around during this vulnerable time for one, vulnerable emotion wise and while I adjust, etc. And I don't like the way she takes care of DS but that's a whole other matter.

If I'm at my parent's house, though, that means I'm thirty minutes from my house. Which means that after a day of moving and everything, if DH wanted to come see us, he'd have to drive across town to visit and he wouldn't be able to stay long. It also means that I'll be that much further from the new house - about an hour. If I wanted to help tell where things were supposed to go or check on the progress and what not, I would have to drive an hour one way just to do so. So while I would be infinitely more comfortable at my parent's house, it's just not practical.

It's also impractical to expect my MIL to drive across town, 30 minutes both ways, twice daily. I understand it, truly I do. But it doesn't mean I like it. So what's the next option? That I stay with my ILs at their house once this next LO is born. Yes, this will alienate my parents from visiting - or at least my father - but it means that I'll be able to see DH every night and if I need to go over to the new house, I'm that much closer. Why isn't this a great solution? Besides my overall discomfort with my ILs and general distaste for the way they act towards my son and the things they say about me, their house is not ideal in any sense. It's small, crowded, cluttered. Because of its construction, you can hear every little sound that anyone else in the house makes. It means I'll be confined for hours on end with a woman that I can't stand and then be subjected to his father, who equally annoys me, for hours on end until I can sleep - and even then, I won't be at peace because they're practically in the next room to where I would be staying.

And why can't I stay in my current house? Because they'll be busy going in and out of it, moving our things as quickly and as efficiently as possible. Because they'll be stirring up copious amounts of dust, mold, and whatever else have you that's not good for me, LO, or DS. Because it's just not practical and until we get our list down for the new house (one that's already been shared with everyone), we're not going to be able to go there. It may be as long as a week before we get our new family even marginally settled - and that's if we don't unpack!

If I'm in that house for long, I know that emotions will get tense. My hormones and emotions will be all over the place after the birth. I'll be trying to still be mom to my son, which will be exhausting and frustrating when I won't be able to do stuff I normally could because I'm recovering. My MIL will hover and try to take over in some way - and I'll let her, just to get her out of my hair. We'll be in close contact, every day, for hours on end. She'll try to do everything in her power to please me because I've just given her two greatest gifts ever: another grandchild and unlimited access to her (currently, we're Team Green so we don't know) only grandson. I mean, she'll be in bliss and I'll be in hell and I know - I just know - that all the issues that I have with her will explode one day. That I won't be able to keep my mouth shut and I'll ruin my already rocky relationship with DH's parents and they'll resent me forever after.

I don't want them to hate me. I don't really hate them. But there's so many instances, so many things she does that I can't stand and she won't listen when I try to tell her calmly and reasonably… She has no boundaries and she won't adhere to the ones I set! If I'm in her house, it'll be like putting us in a pressure cooker together. Eventually, something's going to blow. And I don't want DH to be caught between me and his parents. That's not fair to him.

I'm just… I'm just so frustrated and hormonal I could scream from it all. Instead, I've been trying not to cry. What would you do in this type of situation?