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I had been TTC for nine months when I had my annual well woman exam. I brought it up to my doctor and she recommended tests for my and my husband at that time. She said she didn't expect to find anything wrong because I have regular cycles. There was something wrong with my husband's analysis and that's when we knew we were dealing with infertility.

That was a year ago and there have been lots of doctor's visits, tests, and a surgery for my husband. We still haven't gotten pregnant. We're seeing a RE now and I expect we'll start IVF in June.

I don't think it is too early to ask your doctor about the next step. S/he may tell you to give it some more time, but at least you won't wonder what they might have said if you just asked.

the word 'infertility' makes me cringe, i avoid it. i guess since we haven't prevented in 21 months and have been actively trying for 17 months, and we've sought assistance, you could say we're 'dealing with infertility'. i like to think of it as 'seeking assistance to get pregnant'. 'infertility' makes me feel hopeless and dependent on outsiders.

for you though, do you know if you're Oing? do you chart or use OPKs? that info can be helpful to bring since it gives your DR some insight. acupuncture and herbs can be really helpful in regulating your cycles if you are looking for a more natural way to get your body back on track. or if you feel like time is of the essence and you want to talk to the dr about meds, then your appointment would be a good time to start that conversation. i hope you have some answers soon!

Similar to @Mrs. Cowgirl

My cycles were non-existent when off BCP, and for insurance purposes I couldn't be referred to an RE until we had one year of documented TTC troubles.

I knew something was up when my period was missing for more than six months and I wasn't pregnant.

We got our BFP on our twelfth cycle and I about to make the appointment with my GP to start looking at our options.

I'd been assured by two OBs that it would happen right away for me (since I'd gotten pregnant accidentally in the past although it ended in m/c) and my cycles seemed regular, but after a few months of trying I started wondering what was wrong. Just before we started trying, DH told me about his varicocele, so 3 months in we saw a urologist who confirmed that we had severe MFI. Next we saw the RE, who dropped the bombshell that actually I had DOR and was about to go into menopause (at 31) even though I didn't have any symptoms. So...I wouldn't waste too much time with the OB if you're able to move on to a specialist.

ETA: We brought out the big guns as soon as he gave me the diagnosis - I'm in the middle of an IVF cycle right now.

When I wasn't getting my period and wasn't ovulating, I considered myself on that path. Who knows if I would have conceived on my own, with my family history, I wasn't interested in waiting a year to find out.

I knew I was having very short cycles and started Clomid on our 5th cycle officially TTC. At that time I was 36, so even though I hadn't reached 6 months, I still felt we were dealing with IF by that point, if not before.

.We NTNP for 6 months, then we officially tried for another 9 months all while using the CBEFM then I talked to my dr we ran lots of tests. I finally got pregnant on a non-medicated cycle at the 18 months mark. (I think I still had clomid in my system from the previous month, all the side effects were still there from the clomid). Like @mrs. bird I never really considered myself infertile. We did get 1 bill from insurance declining a claim bc of it but idk. We were unexplained infertility according to my OB.

We tried on our own starting in Aug 2011. I went to my well woman visit armed with info from charting in Nov 2011 and my GYN suggested we try for 6 more months. In March 2012 we went to my GYN for a consult and he sent us to the RE a month later after tests revealed I had a blocked tube and DH had morphology issues. We started down the road to IVF in April 2012 and got pregnant in Oct 2012 (after a first failed attempt in June).

I just had a feeling something was wrong after the first few months honestly. We were doing everything right, I had totally normal cycles and didn't know how we could NOT be getting pregnant.

I think it is a good time for you to ask some questions about your cycles and where you guys might go from here. I'm sorry that you are having to go down this road! Hopefully your doc will have some good information for you.

I was like @alayaya:, I charted used OPKs and had predictable clearly read ovulation patterns. It took us 10 months to get pregnant and then miscarried...it was around that time that I started to really think that something was not clicking, and that we might need outside help.

After 12 months I decided to scheduled a visit with my OBGYN during what would have been our 15th cycle--in early 2012--but we got pregnant again in our 13th cycle.

I'm still not sure that there wasn't a problem, and if there was I don't know if it was DH or me.

We tried for a year before going in to see an RE. During that year I charted, used the CBEFM, used pre-seed, and tried all sorts of things to make it happen. I spoke with my OB/GYN about it, and she assured me that for some people it just takes time. I didn't feel like I had the time to just keep trying. So I found an RE and got the process started at month 13th. I wish I had started sooner, because now I'm on month 20 and still not pregnant. I had no idea it would every take us this long, and at this point I'm wondering if we can even get pregnant.

I think it's hard in the first year to convince yourself that something is wrong - you want to have the hope that you can achieve pregnancy on your own. That's how I was anyways. But after a year, it became clear that we needed help.

All of the tests didn't really clarify what's wrong though. We just can't get pregnant. And we're onto our 3rd medicated cycle with IUI now.

When I went off of BC I had a 43 day cycle, which I thought was normal/my body regulating itself. But then I had 2 50 day cycles in row and each time I had to call my GYN. She would send me for bloodwork to see if I ovulated, and when I didn't, gave me a rx for provera to induce a period. She refused to do anything else for me to help me ovulate, and said I needed to see an RE.

At first I was annoyed because I didn't think there was a real problem and had heard lots of stories of OB/GYNs prescribing Clomid and people ending up pregnant without much of an issue. But after meeting with the RE and doing some more bloodwork and an ultrasound, she diagnosed me with PCOS. I've also found out that I'm somewhat Clomid resistant, so I turned out to be a good thing that I had to see an RE and have monitored cycles, instead of just being an rx for Clomid and left on my own.

I know you had a miscarriage, so I wouldn't get too concerned that you have a huge problem or anything. But at the same time, if you feel like you want a more aggressive approach, I don't see anything wrong with that.

I find it interesting how some people say they just had a feeling something was not right. And how much doctors can vary in their advice and care.

The standard protocol seems to be to head to the doctor after 1 year if you're 34 and under, and 6 months if you're 35 or older. However, I agree with TCOYF that if you're positive you've been timing intercourse at the right time, you should consider seeing someone after 3-4 months. That's why we'll be heading to the RE if I'm not pregnant this cycle.

@Anonysquire: do you guys have a known fertility factor that you're dealing with? I'm surprised to hear you were going for IVF, which seems like the most involved process of them all, after just 5 months.

Old post but interested in more/other responses...

I'm considering this secondary IF now. We have had two losses over the last year of TTC#2. Results after the last loss show a clotting issue MTHFR and an autoimmune issue. I think we will need assistance addressing these issues before we are successful again.

Similarly, I knew something was wrong almost immediately. It was clear that my cycles weren't normal, and that I wasn't ovulating. When the progesterone didn't kick start them, I didn't hesitate to jump to the big guns of clomid. When that didn't work at first, I figured that we'd be in for a while.

Now that we've been NTNP for 26 months (after I delivered my daughter) with nothing but a single chemical pregnancy, my infertility is pretty clear. I'm close to giving up hope of ever getting pregnant naturally.

For years I knew it was very likely that we would have trouble due to my pituitary tumor. Then I worked really hard to get my hormones in check before TTC and naively thought everything would be okay and we would be pregnant within 3 months. I realized it was not going to be easy after a few months of doing everything right. I decided to make an appointment at the RE for 8 months and still worried that I was rushing things. I went for my first appointment yesterday and I will be moving to an IUI after we finish all of our testing. I don't feel comfortable saying that we are dealing with IF because we don't have an official diagnosis and it hasn't been a year, but personally I feel that we are.

After six months of trying I went to my OB just to ask questions, I was getting antsy, I thought it would only take a few cycles to a BFP. She told me that they don't get concerned until it's been a full year of trying, then she told me what kind of tests they would do and explained things.

I'm glad I went in just to get my questions asked by a professional and so that I could understand things a bit better.

Has anyone had a situation where there was nothing outright to give them concern? It's been one year for us and 7 cycles during that year so irregularity is clearly an issue to some extent (but I am 100% Oing). As far as I know, without having any testing done, I don't have any underlying conditions. I was completely regular throughout my teens, basically pre-BC. I had a chemical pregnancy so my doctor said that was a good sign. I think that might be why I'm hesitant to go back for the "next step" now?

ETA: Sorry, too tired - it's been 9 cycles today now!