I am a mommy to a 5 week old boy. I keep wondering when a sense of normalcy will kick in. I feel so unsettled these days and overwhelmed by everything. When did you mommies start to feel a sense of normalcy? I know that things will never be like they used to be. I will be looking forward to a new kind of normal though. I'm getting antsy for that to kick in!
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I think it's different for everyone. For our first baby it took 1-2 months and this time it was much quicker :). Hang in there! It'll happen!
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@marriedandlovingit: I totally remember feeling like that in the early weeks...I almost felt like I was on the brink of pp depression...I was super anxious and overwhelmed...and I wasn't used to feeling like that. I loved my baby girl but in a lot of ways missed my old life. BUT it did get better...slowly and gradually...I would say around 6 weeks I felt much better and started getting used to the new normal...it helped me to "get ready" for the day by putting on an outfit other than sweats/pjs and putting on a little makeup. It got a little better everyday and I would say by 3 months I felt adjusted and settled into a new kind of normal. And it only gets better! LO is almost 7 months and I love being a SAHM...I reached out to some new moms I met and meet up about once a week...it helps so much knowing other people are going through the same emotions/transitions. I feel so lucky bc these mom friends have babies 1-2 months older than me so they kind of give me an idea of what I can expect.
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It was around 10 weeks that I started feel normal again. I know it feels chaotic for the first few months-- but it really does get easier. If someone you trust can watch LO for an hour or two, a few times a week that will help you in the mean time. Just to get out, take a nap, have some alone time, will make the transition smoother.
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@HeatherlovesKenny: yes, that is such great advice! That definitely helped. My dad is retired and would come stay with LO as she napped and i would get out of the house at least once a week and that helped me so much.
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At three months, then at four months it all fell apart again but by 6 months we were golden. Feels like a long time while you're in it, but it's not forever.
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I think it was gradual for me, and to be honest with a 6 month old LO i think it is still evolving. Bf'ing got better around six weeks and things in general were better around 10-11 weeks but then i had to go back to work and things changed again!
It was really hard during my leave, in spite of a lot of support, i ended up in tears at least once a week. Now things are so much better and those early weeksfeel like a blur. Be gentle with yourself!
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Oh I totally remember feeling that way. Not only was I still recovering physically, but trying to handle a baby all day on my own was getting overwhelming, especially when he only napped in my arms. At 6 weeks I was able to get him to nap on our bed during the day and that helped a lot. It was really at the 6 week mark that a lot changed for me. He started taking 3 naps on his own, two 1-hour naps and one 2-hour nap. So I started cooking and cleaning more often to feel more normal. I started running errands, not every day but I usually tried to get out of the house every other day. The day he hit 6 weeks old I also started working out at the gym consistently and that helped me start to feel more "normal" again.
It does take a bit of time, and a bit of finding yourself all over again to get into the niche of things. And it keeps changing too, as your baby grows. My daily routine at 6 weeks is different now that Cobi is 14 weeks. So don't expect too much consistency. Sometimes they nap, sometimes they don't. -
It took me 2 months to be able to consider any commitments on a regular basis (we started swim lessons that week). I still felt very scrambled and chaotic until about 10 weeks.
The good news is that somewhere along the way things started feeling normal, I just don't remember the exact time- I just couldn't remember life without him very clearly.
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I don't really remember (that's how much of a blur it was!) but I would say 6 months and thereafter, when the baby starts to eat solids and you cut down nursing a bit, was a good time. Thought I did return to work at 2 months so I guess I felt pretty normal by then! Had to get it together, no choice.... But I think that structure really helped me, and life was much LESS frustrating when I had some time "to myself" every day (even at work!)
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Every time we got into a groove, something changed and threw me off again. I think that was the hardest part about becoming a mom for me. I love stability and routine, and a baby was the one thing in my life that came along that I couldn't control. After a few major changes though (and after he started sleeping thru the night) I got used to the transitions and now this crazy just seems like normal
And trust me, if I can get used to it, anyone can!! Hang in there... things get better and you will soon have regular downtime to look forward to every day.
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For the first time I would say at about 3-4 months.
Hoping this time around it will be sooner. Baby 2 is only 3 weeks old. -
For me, it was when LO was 5 months. At 5 months, I really started to feel half normal again - at this point, LO had been taking her naps at regular times, we were on a good breastfeeding schedule, and she was starting to sit up on her own and learning to play with her toys for long stretches of time. Anything before 5 months, I was a wreck.
No matter what, though, IT GETS BETTER.
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My mom kept telling me at 3 months it gets easier. She was so right.
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wow, I totally remember this! and it wasn't even that long ago..
for me, once I figured out how to get out the door and do "me" things with the baby, I started to feel normal. when I could get back to the outside world with DS, run errands, visit friends, etc., I started to feel like I was a part of the population again.
but to be honest, my household still isn't the same 6 months out. I feel like I'm always behind on the cleaning/dishes/laundry schedule.. oh well.. someday that will get back to normal, right? -
@artbee: My coworker (father of two) told me that the first three months is spent trying to keep the baby alive at the expense of your sanity. After that, it's smooth(er) sailing.
And trust me, if I can get used to it, anyone can!! Hang in there... things get better and you will soon have regular downtime to look forward to every day.
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