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@maybebaby - it does get better. I can so relate to what you are going through. I had third degree tears, with no epidural as well. I am 4 weeks postpartum and feel more normal now than I ever thought I would. I, too, thought I would never be "normal" again after it happened. If I walk too much it does hurt a little and feel uncomfortable, and the more I rest the better I feel. I think at 2 weeks postpartum was when I felt human again. Everything isn't all perfect now at 4 weeks (I am still sleep deprived and sore), but I feel there is hope for feeling better physically and getting into some sort of routine with my baby. I still use tucks pads, Motrin and showers for relief. Hang in there!