We always pay. MIL and BIL always pretend like they don't see the bill or go to the bathroom. Or my MIL will say stuff like "FYI, I'm not bringing my wallet" when we pick her up. Annoying but DH doesn't seem to mind!
We always pay. MIL and BIL always pretend like they don't see the bill or go to the bathroom. Or my MIL will say stuff like "FYI, I'm not bringing my wallet" when we pick her up. Annoying but DH doesn't seem to mind!
GOLD / wonderful pomegranate / 28905 posts
haha it's actually always a battle. With my family my brothers ALWAYS want to pay!! Asians. With the ILs they are the same way but at least they let us pay sometimes. My BIL will be the type to ignore that the bill is there. *rolleyes*
kiwi / 691 posts
When we go out with my mom or dad (they are divorced), they almost always pay. The only time they don't is if it's a special occasion, like we are taking them out for a birthday or Father's Day. But my husband's family always splits the check, which I think is SO weird! Maybe I'm spoiled. I know we are grown-ups now, but for some reason, I don't feel weird letting my parents pay.
coconut / 8854 posts
With my family my Dad always pays! He gets mad if we try to pay actually! With DH's family, it's always split, like to the penny. People are out with their phones, typing in all the numbers, exactly figuring out how much everyone should tip.....Just weird to me. But whatever!
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21616 posts
so weird... We've always just paid for ourselves, my parents pay for themselves and any siblings pay for themselves. I don't think any of us could afford the tab of our whole family!
cantaloupe / 6164 posts
my parents and in-laws always foot the tab. if it's one of our dad's birthday or father's day, we'll pay for them, but otherwise, they always pay. and we don't feel bad.
wonderful olive / 19353 posts
If my family visits us, we pay (we live in TX and my family lives in OK). If we visit them, they pay. However, we all fight for the bill regardless. Guess it's an Asian thing.
If we're out with my in-laws, my BIL pays.
pomegranate / 3414 posts
It depends, typically in a given weekend visit DH/I will pay for one meal and my parents will pay for another; we try to limit our going out to just once or twice. I alone make more than my parents combined so I feel that I should help cover some of the expense when we go out to eat. My mom and I have talked about this a lot because while she appreciates it she doesn't feel it is necessary.
We went on an all family (mom/dad, my family, sister's family) last summer and I think most of the time when we all went out together we paid for our own families except for a couple of special dinners when either my sister and I picked up the tab.
GOLD / cantaloupe / 6581 posts
Oh my gosh we fight over the bill every time with my in-laws! We actually make more money than they do, so I always try to pick it up whenever we go out with them, but they ALWAYS fight us on it! I know they are trying to be nice, but I feel awful when we 'let' them pay. When it comes to my Dad, he always pays, and my husband feels weird about it and I don't. Mostly because my dad makes a high 6-figure salary, I figure it's peanuts to him
He will let us pick up the occasional meal though, so my husband can feel better. hehe.
hostess / wonderful honeydew / 32460 posts
When we eat out with DH's parents, they always pay.
When we eat with my parents, they try to pay, but DH grabs the bill (most of the time he's successful).
When we eat with BIL/SIL sometimes we'll pay, other times they pay.
pear / 1837 posts
If my dad is around, he always pays. When it's just my mom visiting, we kind of take turns, though I'm pretty sure she ends up paying more. We're all happy with that arrangement- my parents definitely have more money than we do, it's no hardship for them, and we appreciate it.
I feel like a total jerk for admitting this, but I actually get kind of frustrated with DH's dad for how often we end up picking up the bill. I don't mind if it's little things, but we ended up going out with DH's dad and another cousin and the bill was well over $100; DH was outside with LO, and his dad didn't do anything when the check came, so I picked it up and paid for it. Now, if you add up assets, DH's dad falls in the top 5% of all Americans or something like that, and he has no dependents and no debt. DH and I have way less, we have a kid, and we have student loans and a mortgage. We try not to go out for dinner that often, and what we spent on that check was more than we'd normally spend on 5 dinners out together. Picking up the bill wasn't going to break the bank or anything, but it's definitely an amount that means something to us. It's a drop in the bucket for DH's dad. Oh, well.
GOLD / wonderful coconut / 33402 posts
My in-laws usually cover the bill when we go out when them. My parents have had it tough financially the last couple years, so we tend to pick up the tab most times. But last time we went to lunch they did.
GOLD / wonderful olive / 19030 posts
Neither of our parents ever let us pay! And if you question it or try to pay they act insulted, so we just say thank you and that's it!
GOLD / wonderful grape / 20289 posts
Parents always pay. My dad says that we can pay when we make more money then him. Which will be never.
pomegranate / 3716 posts
When we're with my parents, they always pay and don't want us to pay for anything.
When we're with his parents, we often pay... or if his sister and BIL are there too, they'll pick up the tab half the time. Considering we see them every week and go out to eat at least once a week with them, it all adds up. At least we can split it with SIL and BIL though... we're going on a family vacation (a cruise) next month with his parents, and SIL, BIL and their 2 kids. It makes my head hurt to think about how much we're going to spend... this will be our first family vacation with them!
We go on family trips with my parents pretty frequently, like once a year. But they pick up the tab for everything...
GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22646 posts
ILs usually pay, we pay for my parents. Usually pay with lil bro, but he pays a lot too.
pomelo / 5789 posts
When we're with my mom she pays and wont let us touch the bill.
When we're with his family (including his siblings) the bill is split down to the last cent.
When we're with his mom, she expects us to pay.
Interesting how there are a lot of similar answers.
GOLD / wonderful pea / 17697 posts
When we're out with my ILs (including BsIL/SsIL) we don't even get a chance to see the bill. DH's family is well-off, and it makes them happy to treat. They'll grab it before we even have the chance, and brush off when we offer/try to pay.
DH's aunt is the worst about it...she'll get up to go the bathroom and give her card to the waiter/waitress so the bill doesn't even make it to the table.
kiwi / 658 posts
with my mom, we always try to pay. with DH'S mom she always sneaks off and pays. when we're with our siblings, they never want us to pay. we're both the youngest in our family so we get spoiled on both sides
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21628 posts
We take turns. Sometimes we'll split it. It can be a fight though. My husband likes to pay for his mom and she likes to pay for us. When I go out with my younger brothers I always pay. They are just starting out and don't have a lot of money, so I like to pay for their meal. They don't mind! When we go out with my husband's siblings we all take turns.
kiwi / 537 posts
Both sets of our parents usually pay. On occassion, they will let us take care of the bill.
coconut / 8681 posts
With my in-laws they always pay unless we’re taking them out for their birthday or something. With my parents we usually all split the check.
GOLD / squash / 13464 posts
Oh man it is always a BATTLE with both my parents and my in-laws. Everybody wants to pay! Usually the winner is whoever can grab the check fast enough. The only time a bill is ever split is if we all go out together. Usually in that case my dad and my FIL will just split it in half.
cantaloupe / 6800 posts
My parents ALWAYS pay, his parents never pay so we usually split it. If we go out with any siblings we split it.
pomegranate / 3388 posts
With my parents, they always pay. With DH's mom, she often pays, but sometimes we do depending on the circumstance. With DH's dad we usually pay. With my sister, we usually just each pay for our own food.
persimmon / 1341 posts
We rarely eat out with my inlaws but when we do it's typically a toss up. Either they pay or we get separate checks. my father in law says that separate checks are best that way people feel like they can order whatever they want without worrying about the price.
With my parents they almost always pay but my husband will always offer. If we go out with just my mom it's a toss up. Sometimes we'll pay, sometimes she does, sometimes one gets the bill and the other the tip, etc. so I'd say it ends up even.
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
Speak of the devil....my MIL just called and wants to go out for lunch. My BIL is joining us too....
GOLD / squash / 13464 posts
@autumnlove: So she will call you and ask you to go out to lunch... and then expect you to pay??
See we don't live near our families so when we go out together it's when we are visiting each other so we all just head out to dinner. If we lived in the same place I would assume that whoever initiated meeting up for a meal would pay.
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