Hellobee Boards

Exactly!!!!! I agree with you Winniewolf. It's a pet peeve of mine and I have to refrain from commenting just to try and avoid 'drama'.

@winniebee: I agree!

Also, the fact that you spelled judgment correctly tells me that you must indeed be a lawyer!

I agree. I don't knock anyone for the way they give birth--it's a personal decision. I find the judgment on both sides. It's also interesting when it happens in real life, the few people I've told about my plans to give birth naturally in a birthing center have either looked at me like I have two heads, screamed that I must have an epidural, or have said, "I'm a wimp" or "I'm too much of a crybaby to go without an epidural," something self-deprecating. It's all ok!

I've gotten a lot of flack about my choice for having an epi with both my deliveries. Some people just don't get it.
I, personally, had no desire to have a 13 hour labor in sheer agony if I didn't have to. So I didn't. And with the second one the epi was waiting on me to get there lol I'm not a big fan of pain and I didn't have much desire to move around during either labors. I just wanted to rest and get to business.

I agree, as long as you aren't putting your baby in unnecessary danger, then it's your decision!

I'm proud of my decision (for me), but I give mad props to ANYONE who is able to do the whole thing au naturale!

I've been on both the "if it'll prevent another (non-invasive) exam, then cut me open" and the "30% survival rate due to reaction to medication" sides of medical issues. Neither "side" is wrong. I feel strongly about my "side", but I know that's because of my life experiences.

Birth requires support and confidence in one's surroundings. If you don't trust yourself to birth a child, a natural childbirth will be hell. If you don't trust a doctor not to turn you into a vegetable, a medicated or surgical childbirth will be hell. If you change your mind about medication halfway through a natural childbirth, go with it.

I do think that increased education would be beneficial to most, if not all, mothers. KNOW what a procedure or medication entails/contains and does and what the risks are before you are in your third trimester.

What REALLY pisses me off is when someone close to the new mom gives her flack for what she ended up doing. A very close friend of mine took the epidural despite initially wanting a natural birth (her son was sunny-side up - the epi slowed labor drastically, but not so much that they intervened), and her mom would NOT shut up about it. My friend ended up beating herself up over it for months. Come on, she gave birth to a beautiful, perfectly healthy boy, she maintained her composure and humor, and she was able to hold her son within minutes of birth - where's the fault in that?

I am not judgemental about it. I chose to get an epidural and I'm glad I did. If anything I am impressed by the women who choose natural childbirth. It just wasn't for me. Though I have seen women who gave birth naturally give the rest of us a hard time. They tend to have statistics on the complications on hand immediately. I'm not sure why this happens. I think anyone who has a baby should be proud of their accomplishment!

I admit to judging a friend who was determined not to get an epidural ... but that's because she also said she's very wimpy and doesn't like pain. I also know people who go natural and swear by it, and I feel like more power to them!

@cupcakemama: I think on boards that I've read it seems that the ladies in the epidural/c-section/induction camp get judged/bashed.

But in my experience and in what I've read on natural birth boards, the ladies in the natural camp get a lot of judgment in real life. The o_O looks, the "You're crazy!" and "You'll be begging for the epi!" and a general lack of support.

@mrsjazz: I guess that is my take on it too. I couldn't care less what other women do. I might disagree with their choices but it's not my place to judge and it's none of my business. I will burr up though when I feel that my choices are being judged or it is being implied that I am ill informed or less strong than others.

When I told a doctor friend that I planned on a natural childbirth, he scoffed at me and said, "It's women like you who always end up begging for the epidural." I was SO offended that I cried!

I don't get why people judge others on their birth plan. We are all different, thus have a preferred way to do things. I've had friends that have gone natural, done a home birth, and had an epi. It doesn't matter what you choose. If it is right for you, then who cares?

I did it natural, but when people choose to do epidural that's fine by me. Whenever people ask me if it's "better" to go natural I say there's really no "better" or "right" way - as LONG as mama and baby are healthy in the end, that's the most important. Does it really matter HOW we get there?? I just tell them I can't speak to what it's like to get an epidural bc I've only experienced an un-medicated birth so I really don't know the other side.

With parenting though, it seems we get judged for EVERY decision, not just the natural vs. epidural thing. Breastmilk vs formula, homeschool vs public, when to start solids, homemade baby food vs storebought... and the list goes on and on!....

I don't judge women on their choice. I went natural because I have an extremely high pain tolerance and fear of needles.
I do judge women nwho don't do their research and learn and make the decision. My little sister has had 4 kids and knows nothing about childbirth.

I hate judgmental aholes! I can never understand how some people need to constantly prove their "superiority". This might just be a cultural thing, but a lot of women around here have a ego, similar to men elsewhere. I don't get it and never want to.

I know I'll be judged when I give birth, whether natural or not, but I don't care. I have nothing to prove to them and would rather avoid the drama.