Working, school, and baby, oh my!

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Working, school, and baby, oh my!

By Bookish Sep 28, 2012

Hi y'all!

I'm currently on cycle 3 of TTC, so not preggers yet, but some things have been weighing on my mind a bit that I hoped y'all could help with!

Right now, I work full time at a library and am going to grad school half time (2 classes/6 hours) online. I'm starting to worry that having a baby will push me over the edge, stress-wise. When/if we get pregnant I will probably drop down to one class, but stopping school is not really an option for me, as it is generously being paid for by my work and I need it for career advancement.

So really, I just wanted to see if any of you ladies have done anything like this, and not felt like you were going to lose your mind. I have a great, supportive DH who thinks I can do it (and swears he will help out as much as I need!) but I wanted to hear from Y'ALL!! Tell me it's possible to juggle this many things!!

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poll: Were you in school when you got pregnant?
Yes, I was in school and continued classes as normal : (2 votes)

10 %

Yes, but I had to lessen my course load : (1 votes)

5 %

Yes, but I had to drop out : (2 votes)

10 %

No, I was not in school, but I was working : (11 votes)

52 %

I was in school + working part-time : (0 votes)

I was in school + working full-time : (5 votes)

24 %

None of the above! : (0 votes)

17 votes

Tags: grad school , working mom

12 comments

mrsjyw
GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22646 posts

Sep 28, 2012

We got our BFP in March of this year! I work full time and took two grad courses (online) this past summer term. I decided to skip this fall semester (due date Nov) and will be going back in January.

With the right resources (my mom will be our primary caretaker) I will be on maternity leave til end of feb and ILs are only 20 min away as well; I think I will be ok-- I'll let you know come January how it really goes!
Foodnerd81
wonderful cherry / 21504 posts

Sep 28, 2012

I can't speak from experience so I'm not voting, but do you have the option to reduce your hours at work? Like, even if you just worked 4 days a week plus the class? It does seem like an awful lot in the beginning.
Honeybee
pomelo / 5178 posts

Sep 28, 2012

Are you getting your MLS degree? Me too!

I worked fullt-ime while pregnant with my first, and added school online when she was about 16 months old. I also found out I was pregnant with #2 right before I started my program. My program is pretty structured, so once I started, there's no such thing as dropping down to part-time status or taking fewer classes; I'm pretty much committed to finishing up the degree full-time (only 1.5 semesters and a field study to go!). My husband also completed his grad degree while I was pregnant with #1 and during her first year of life. We both worked full-time during that period, as well, so it's been a busy few years for us.

Once I had #2, I quit working, because I don't think we could handle 2 under 2, two full-time working parents, and me going to school full-time. Honestly, we've had some hard times, but we made it through to the other side! The hardest part has just been making sure I stay on track with my classes. I don't always want to stay up a couple extra hours at night (when I haven't slept in 3 days) to complete a paper, but I have to. I don't always want to go into seclusion upstairs to work on my mid-term while DH gets to play and have fun with the kids downstairs, but I have to. My husband helps a ton by taking on a good amount of responsibility around the house and with the kids, but I'm pretty much busy all the time. I'm looking forward to graduating next summer just so I can finally get a break! But it's definitely worth it for both of us to have our degrees, and I'd much rather do this now, while the kids are young and can't remember it, than we're they're older.
Lozza
pear / 1837 posts

Sep 28, 2012

I feel like it depends on a few factors, mainly: how stressful is your job, how stressful is school, and will you have time to rest and relax if you continue both?
I wasn't in school, but I was working full-time at a job where I felt like any work I couldn't finish during the workday needed to come home and be finished on nights and weekends... plus I have a crazy long commute. I think that if I'd been able to work an 8-9 hour day and then leave work at work, even if I hadn't been as productive as usual, I'd have been ok to add a class or some other type of commitment, particularly if I wasn't spending nearly 2 hours in the car every day.
Bookish
GOLD / cantaloupe / 6581 posts

Sep 28, 2012

@mrsjyw: Awesome!! I hope it works out for you And congrats!

@Foodnerd81: No, unfortunately at this time reduced hours aren't an option. I do know my work is OK with people going part-time though, so maybe in a year or so I could re-visit it.

@Honeybee: I am getting my MLS!! Yayyy libraries!! I definitely appreciate the sentiment that you have to make sure you stay on track with your classes. I know I will have all sorts of excuses for NOT doing my homework, and I need to just get it done!

@Lozza: My work is so-so on the stress front, but luckily when the work slows down, I can work on my homework! So far I've been able to balance both pretty well, since I can leave work at work and get some HW done while I'm there. And YUCK on the two hours in the car I'm very lucky, I only work 15-20 mins away from my home.
Rock n Roll
kiwi / 678 posts

Sep 28, 2012

I do! I work full-time and take two classes per semester. I have a nearly three year old and a three month old. I should graduate December 2013.

It is tough, but not impossible. It takes a lot of dedication. I have a helpful husband and my mom and MIL both help out with childcare when necessary. I power through with "this is only for a short time!" thoughts. I also do a lot of planning and scheduling. I had to take an online exam in the hospital before they started my induction for my youngest daughter! But, now is the easiest time for me to do it. The kids are young, my job pays for it. I think it will be tougher once my youngest gets mobile, but for right now, it's not too bad.
T.H.O.U.
wonderful clementine / 24134 posts

Sep 28, 2012

@Bookworm: Thats great that you work so close to home. One thing I didn't factor so much before having LO was the added time it takes to drop her off and pick her up at daycare. I work a standard 8-5 day. I worked with my boss to work 7:30-4:30 so I could beat traffic. We leave home at 6:30, I nurse her and drop her off and have a 20-30 minute drive into work. After work its the same thing. I leave at 4:30 and get home around 5:15.
Honeybee
pomelo / 5178 posts

Sep 28, 2012

@Rock n Roll: "this is only for a short time" <-- that's what I say, too! The closer I get to being done, the more grateful I am that I'm doing this now and getting it done with, rather than waiting.

@Bookworm: Do you mind me asking which school are you attending? Did you just start your program? I would say going to school while pregnant is not nearly as difficult as doing it with a newborn, so if you can take a full load while pregnant, it's a good idea!
Bookish
GOLD / cantaloupe / 6581 posts

Sep 28, 2012

@Honeybee: I'm going to UNT (University of North Texas) and yep, just started this semester! Right after we started TTC-ing LOL! I was wondering whether or not taking a full load was a good idea when I was pregnant, but you're right, it probably won't be nearly as hard as when I have a newborn!! Where are you getting yours at?
Honeybee
pomelo / 5178 posts

Sep 28, 2012

@Bookworm: I'm at the University of Maryland. I'm a little over halfway through right now; I'll graduate next fall. My hardest semester was probably over the summer, while DS was a newborn (he was born in March). By that time, my husband was back at work, all the visitors had left, and it was just me home with two kids all day, every day. Plus, my summer semester is 2 six week courses, so they were pretty intense. Even though I have tough pregnancies, at least I got to dictate my schedule a little more while pregnant; now, my study/school schedule is very much dictated by the kids' schedules.
blackbird
wonderful grape / 20453 posts

Sep 28, 2012

Well I work full time and also take grad courses, and I have known many people who continue to do so. Online classes are very flexible. I've known people who take 2 classes but I'd say it depends on the coursework. I only work 40 hours a week, not 60 like some of my friends, and I block off some weekends to be sure I get extra work done. It also helps that Dh is very understanding about it....I'm not even concerned
Bookish
GOLD / cantaloupe / 6581 posts

Sep 29, 2012

@Honeybee: Ooh, you're halfway, that's awesome! You're my new role model, ok? Good luck with the second half!!

@blackbird: That's really great that you know other people that do this sort of stuff! I think one of the main reasons I am so concerned is that in my social circle (and in my family), I am the only person I know doing this much school + work, and I only know ONE other working mom, which is nuts to me, really. I don't think I'd be so worried if I had seen other people do it!

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