After being admitted last weekend with a Bilirubin level of 21, Harper was discharged with a level of 12.6 after 2.5 days of phototherapy. Since then, we've monitored her levels and they've continued to go up again. Her Ped thinks it's a very stubborn case of "Breastfeeding jaundice" which is when something in the breastmilk prevents the breakdown of bilirubin, and causes the baby to be more jaundiced. So I have been giving her formula since Thurs night and pumping/freezing in hopes that a few days of formula will cleanse her system and then we can go back to BFing. Today we checked her levels and they BARELY went down- from 16.8 on Thurs to 16.1 today after all of this formula feeding.

I am so scared that there is a bigger problem and I am really so stressed that I am losing it. It's totally consuming me and I don't think I'm able to fully enjoy her sweet newborn stage bc I'm literally thinking about this stupid jaundice/fearing her next test will show that her levels have gone up.

She is so perfect and sweet and amazing and it is just breaking my heart that she's going through this:(

Just a worried vent here. I cry every day but I guess that's not enough...