I have friends that are doing IVF through a surrogate, and are currently expecting twins! Their twins are due right around the time I was planning on weaning my twins (at 1 year). I had offered my freezer stash to my friends, and they said that they would be willing to pay me to continue pumping in order to provide for their twins. I'm seriously considering this... would you do it? I do feel kind of weird accepting money from them for it, but then again, pumping sucks (no pun intended). On the flip side, being able to provide for two (more!) babies that wouldn't otherwise get any breast milk at all would be amazing.
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I'd probably do it. I'm 2 months into pumping at work and already hate it, but the extra $$ would be nice. And yes, I'd take the $$ for my time. And it would be super cool to know you're doing such a wonderful thing for those babes.
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I'm really not sure!
How would it work logistically/legally?! What if their twins became severely allergic to something in your diet?
As of now you can make the call on when it's safe to eat something or have a alcoholic beverage. Would they call the shots on that?
In theory it's fantastic that those two little ones will be able to get breast milk. But logistically it sounds like a nightmare to me.
Didn't someone post a blog post about "cheating" your body to produce breastmilk for adopted children? Maybe she can try that?
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If I could continue to pump, I totally would! I think that would be such an amazing gift to be able to provide breast milk for another family! And some extra $$ would be nice too!
That being said, I wouldn't be able to do it. I work full-time and am only allowed to use my breaks to pump at work for the first year of my child's life. I wouldn't be able to continue pumping at work once he turns one, so it would be impossible for me to be able to provide enough breast milk for another family.
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@meganmp: it depends how close the friend was.. If it was one of my BFFs or my sister, then yes. If it was anyone else, probably not. I wouldn't be able to accept money from those 3 people, but then again those are the only 3 I would do it for. I also would likely only be able to do it for a few months. Pumping is wayyyy too much work.
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How much money and for how long
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It's pretty awesome of you to consider, but it sounds hard.
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Depends on how much money, if the price is right. But it would have to be really good because pumping sucks:)
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@regberadaisy: If there was a woman involved in the situation, I'm sure that would be an option, but this is two men using a surrogate (sorry I didn't mention that earlier!).
I think I might try it on a trial basis... if it really sucks, then I will stop. I, of course, will lay this out with them ahead of time. I'll also disclose my diet and my alcohol consumption, and make sure that they're cool with what I have planned.
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@meganmp: men can lactate too! At least, That's what they told us in BF class.. It's super weird though.. Haha
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@Adira: Seriously? They will only give you time to pump for a year? I have never heard of a company limiting time before.
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@Smurfette: I'm honestly not sure what would happen if I wanted to continue pumping past a year. Here's a quote from our company policy:
"A lactating employee may, at her discretion, take a reasonable amount of break time each day to express milk for her child for up to one year after the child's birth."
Then it goes on to say this:
"If an employee is subject to a state or local law that provides for break time beyond one year after the child's birth, the state or local law shall apply."
I'd have to look into my local state laws, but I suspect there isn't one stating that my company needs to give me time to continue pumping, especially because I'm a salaried exempt employee. But it's my understanding that I can pump up to a year, and after that, I probably can't continue taking time out of work to keep doing it.
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It's easy for me to say yes, when I have never pumped before! But if pumping really isn't too bad for you and you get good output, I think it's really great of you to try. If their twins can get breastmilk for the first few months even, that's a great bonus.
I don't know how I'd feel about accepting money though. But I'd probably only do it for someone I was super close to anyway, like my sisters.
Also, any chance their surrogate would pump and ship the milk to them? I read a novel where that happened, but I don't know if that happens in real life.
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I probably wouldn't. After one year, I would want to spend the time with my family without flanges and washing bottles!
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I totally would! I wouldn't feel to bad about taking the money either - it takes a lot if time and effort on your part, and the milk is extremely valuable. I'd pay someone for pumped milk if I needed it!
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I would do it pretty much regardless if the money, just not for very long. Communicate with then early that it's a month to month basis or something so that there is no resentment in either side down the road. I think it's really cool that you are considering it!
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Oh and definitely don't feel bad about taking the money! My friend used some of my milk and gave me a $100 gift card. It made me know she appreciated it.
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16 comments