So, my youngest cousin had his graduation ceremony and family party last weekend (We host ceremonies and prom before final grades are in, I'm not sure if that's just a weird Canadian thing). This cousin has faced various hardship throughout his school career, so I was really excited for him that he'd finally "made it" through, and gifted him several hundred dollars in his card, in hopes he might put it toward future educational endeavors, knowing that it's unlikely he'll get much monetary parental support.

However, turns out he will not be graduating... and now DH is saying that it would be very rude if the cash is not returned to us. I'm certainly not going to ask for it back, and I kind of think if if you give a "conditional" gift prior to knowing whether the condition will be met, that's just the risk I took, and I will try to remember not to gift again if/when he actually graduates. DH says it's more like a wedding. If you send a gift ahead, and the wedding gets canceled, people should get their gifts back.

But, I'm just curious what you guys would think in this situation??