What would you do?
-Tell her you know she's on there.
-Secretly stalk
My sister uses a name she's used for years... maybe, at least, a decade now. She's newly pregnant and I know she frequents a certain forum and she has told me about her activity there in the past. I got bored and found her.
grapefruit / 4089 posts
Secretly stalk first, THEN tell her. I know they would both do the same to me 
pomelo / 5509 posts
Hmmm. Probably just tell her! But I'm assuming she'd be telling me whatever she posted anyway.
honeydew / 7589 posts
I'd tell her right away, just because I try really hard to maintain trust with my little sister so she keeps confiding in me and coming to me for advice. That said, she's my (quite a bit) younger sister, your situation might be a little different.
hostess / wonderful apple seed / 16729 posts
@Greentea: I found her venting about me in one of her posts. It's an old post from 2011. I know we had our ups and downs and 2011 wasn't a good year for us. So I know where she was coming from.
If I tell her, she might filter/censor her posts or start a new name. Then I won't be able to stalk. 
Haha.
ETA: Also, what happens if I piss her off (it happens, we can butt heads), and she vents about me. I want that insider information. haha. And maybe see what side the community is on.
pear / 1510 posts
I would totally stalk. If I found my stalking affecting my relationship with her, I would tell her. Otherwise, totally stalk.
hostess / wonderful apple seed / 16729 posts
@theonewhere: Aww, your gif doesn't work but I know exactly which one you are talking about! Haha!
Found a youtube version of it.
hostess / wonderful apple seed / 16729 posts
@birdofafeather: If I found my brother, I don't know if I would want to stalk him. What do guys talk about on an online forum? Video games, cars? Though, it would be funny to see him be such a dork/ nerd. Haha. I think I would tell my brother because my brother is less dramatic than sisters (Re: girls) are.
honeydew / 7230 posts
I'm afraid of my sister finding me on here!! I would probably just never go back to the site and pretend I never saw her stuff there. I hope that's what my sis would do if she saw I was on here. 
Eta: it's not like I say a ton of secretive stuff on here, but I have discussed some pretty personal things!
GOLD / cherry / 153 posts
@bluestriped bee: Ha, thanks!
My $1.50: Nothing good comes of finding relatives' online venting, even if they are leaving you a breadcrumb trail right to it. The insider info is not worth your potentially hurt feelings. Personal experience (with ILs, not my own sister) talking here.
hostess / wonderful apple seed / 16729 posts
@theonewhere: Good point! While I was reading that old post, it brought up all the negative emotions with that argument we had.
I think I started looking because she is newly pregnant and with my infertility, I'm avoiding her. (I found out she is pregnant because she's on FF.) It's just going to be hard emotionally when she does admit to me when she is pregnant. So seeing her express her joy in being pregnant is a nice (& removed) way of checking up on her. Even if it is stalking. 
Currently we are on good terms, so I don't think she'll vent about me. So hopefully it's all positive.
pineapple / 12053 posts
@bluestriped bee: i was thinking since it was a more personal site that you found your sis, then i would apply the same rational to my brother on a personal site. but yeah, if i found him on a coding software site, i would skip. ha.
pomegranate / 3791 posts
I would say, "Holy shit, I have a sister?!"
Haha..okay, totally unhelpful, I know. I would stalk, I'm bad.
pineapple / 12802 posts
@bluestriped bee: I have been part of a gaming forum with 99.9% men. You do not want to know what they talk about. I wish I could forget.
@wonderstruck: haha! That would be my response too!
papaya / 10473 posts
@theonewhere: @bluestriped bee: hahaha! Dying!
I would totally stalk. No shame.
pear / 1642 posts
@bluestriped bee: I found out my SIL was pregnant when she started posting here on HB. I stalked. Obsessively. Then I casually let her know in conversation that I post here on a semi regular basis. She found me and walled me soon after.
honeydew / 7916 posts
@bluestriped bee: I know you can't unsee it, but I'd like to think I'd pretend I didn't see and try to give her her privacy.
wonderful grape / 20453 posts
Well, she wasn't too great about hiding her identity, eh? I would probably stalk a little and then forget about it
pineapple / 12526 posts
Id stalk the crap out of her... and then probably lose interest.
grapefruit / 4997 posts
I would stalk from time to time but never let her know. Glad y'all are on good terms again. Dealing with family can be tricky since it's a love/ hate relationship. I really enjoy HB and secretly hope none of my family uses this website. But I use this screen name for many things so they could easily find me if they looked into it.
pomegranate / 3192 posts
I would give her privacy too. I wouldn't want her to not be able to talk freely if she knew I was reading her posts.
I really hope someone would do that for me if they found me here.
pomelo / 5228 posts
I think it would be best to let her be (ie. no stalking). Think about how you would want her to act if she found you on here?
pomegranate / 3577 posts
I'd tell my sister and offer to never go to the site again if that is what she wanted. Everything I post on here I'd tell my sister anyway. And if my sister found me, I'd want her to tell me.
GOLD / pomelo / 5737 posts
I think I would leave her alone because honestly I'd be nervous about what I was gonna find! Even if you're close she might make a comment that inadvertently makes you feel just weird.
pomelo / 5000 posts
Ooooh, I would want to read every single post! But after seeing her vent about your former argument, I would feel like I was playing with fire. I wouldn't want to see something that bothered me but then couldn't feel like I could bring it up to her.
persimmon / 1343 posts
I would try to leave it alone, especially if you saw her talking about you. It isn't healthy for the relationship for there to be secret stalking imo
wonderful kiwi / 23653 posts
I'd prob just stalk a little to satisfy my curiosity but then leave it alone... You don't want to find something you don't want to know, and you can't un-know it!
honeydew / 7667 posts
@wonderstruck: Bwahaha.
I'd read but I'm also not the type of person who would get offended if she said something about me. Although maybe I would be if I actually had a sister.
GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22646 posts
@MrsTiz: LOL.
Knowing my nature, I'd totally stalk. And depending on how close we were, I'd spill the beans after I was done thoroughly stalking
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