Jumping off of another thread...
Would you say that you had a stereotypical high school environment and experience? Mean girls, jocks, nerds, outcasts, stoners, etc... Bullying, teasing, peer pressure, cliques, sneaking around, etc...
I would say yes, my high school was very stereotypical.
(I almost said it was like how it's portrayed in movies and TV shows, but have you seen TV show high schools lately? It's almost like college, those kids get too much freedom and can get access to alcohol WAY too easily! Haha.)
I could very easily put every person from my high school in a 'group' or two, and there was a lot of teenage torture and drama. It was painful. I would say I was half Outcast, half Nerd.
It would be interesting to hear about people with different high school experiences!
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
Nope, high school was fine! Junior high was bad.
pear / 1998 posts
I had an overall good experience, but I had my problems. I was a really good kid and in a ton of extra-curriculars. I danced on the pom team with the cool kids. They were nice to me and I think they liked me, but I didn't go (or get invited) to the cool parties after school.
I had a good group of friends. Not too much drama. I didn't have a boyfriend until college so that's where I felt a little like an outsider.
blogger / watermelon / 14218 posts
There were definitely groups/cliques, but I was so uncool that if there were "mean girls" they didn't even really bother me because I wasn't on their radar.
I always tried to "belong" to groups (usually the kind of brainy group since I was in classes with them) and I had a few good friends here and there, but I moved to my town in the 3rd grade after a lot of friend groups were already established (yup!) and I was SUPER shy until after I reached high school. Plus I had a crazy curfew (9pm) so I couldn't even really make any attempts to hang out with "cool" kids.
I was a cheerleader one year so that got me kinda ousted with the brainy kids!
I was a drama geek though, so those were my peeps. But now I only keep in touch with one or two people, and only casually through facebook.
Whenever anyone asks, I always say that I HATED high school. I just always felt like I did not belong anywhere I went. I loved college so much.
squash / 13208 posts
I went to a small Catholic school and then public high school - so it was a huge change and shocker to me.
I will say though that it was pretty stereo-typical although at the time I thought it was awful!
wonderful kiwi / 23653 posts
Wasn't as dramatic as mean girls but it's a typical high school. I had an okay high school experience... I moved to town in 7th grade so it took me a while to find my group of friends. I was also a minority so I pretty much stuck with my group. I think if I was more confident and out-going, I probably could make more friends; people weren't that mean, just clique-y.
papaya / 10343 posts
Ummmm sort of? I mean high school is definitely all about cliques. There are the cool kids and the jocks and the band geeks and the drama kids. My school was no exception on that front, people definitely had their "place."
But I do feel my school was a little different in that it wasn't very "mean." Like I don't really remember anyone ever getting bullied or harassed in school. And there were a lot of friendships between groups. Also I think in somewhat atypical fashion the "cool kids" were basically the ones that were really smart + attractive. The jocks were not the kings of the school like I think is true in a lot of places.
I didn't really fit in a group very well, I never belonged to a single clique but I had friends in multiple cliques and even though I was far from "cool" I don't think there was anyone in my class I couldn't have sat down next to at lunch and that wouldn't have been okay. So I think in that way our school was nicer than most.
GOLD / wonderful coconut / 33402 posts
I went to three different high schools and they all had different groups. But everyone was still super friendly to each other at the last school (OH). not so much at the first two (South FL)
cantaloupe / 6869 posts
No, I wouldn't say my experience was typical. I came from a tiny town and a tiny school where everyone knew everyone. I met some of my best friends there and I fondly look back on my high school experience. Sure, sometimes there was drama but it's unavoidable because teenagers are dramatic.
I think grad school was more akin to what is considered "high school" in terms of drama and cliques. That was surprising to me because I thought drama peters out the older you get.
honeydew / 7504 posts
Definitely a typical high school experience. I was a cheerleader, but in my high school, cheerleaders were not the popular girls. We were the hyper weirdos, basically. I really struggled with high school. In my school district we had 1 elementary school, 1 middle school, and 1 high school. So cliques were formed at a very young age, and you could never break into a clique, but you sure as hell could be ousted from one. In elementary and the beginning of middle school, I was friends with all the "cool" girls, but around 7th grade, suddenly I wasn't good enough for some reason and I was forced out of the group. It was very painful for me. It really wasn't until my junior year of high school that I finally let go of all that. By my senior year I was dressing however the hell I wanted and really just stopped giving a shit what anyone thought of me. But from 7th-10th grade, I tried really hard to conform to the "cool" standards, but was never allowed back into the clique.
Now, even 15 years later, half of those "cool" girls still won't talk to me. I just roll my eyes at it now.
honeydew / 7295 posts
I had a pretty good experience. That's not to say there weren't some bully's and some challenges and I started at a junior high in 9th grade and they were truly brutal! I was the new kid. But then we moved and I went to a high school and whilst I hated going and there were definitely cliques and popularity contests I also made so many amazing friends. I was one of the punk kids and in many schools that might mean not fitting in but my high school was diverse in that arena. I am still friends with a lot of those people today even though its mostly on Facebook that we see each other. There are some people who were nasty but no one really dominated. I was pretty well known in high school with a diverse group of friends, not at all popular but also not an outcast. Overall I feel like I lucked out.
GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22646 posts
Nope! I think ms was brutal, but HS was not! Sure there were different "groups" of people, but overall I think it didn't stop ppl from being friends with one another!
hostess / wonderful apple seed / 16729 posts
It was typical to me. Had to deal my own self esteem issues. Bullying was more elementary and middle school. High school, I just got by. I had my friends and falling out of friends, which caused drama, but I think it was normal.
My crowd was the nerdy, preppy band geeks. Did I stand out in HS? Nope! I didn't want to stand out either.
nectarine / 2932 posts
I loved my high school experience. We definitely had cliques, but for the most part all of the cliques got along with eachother, and I didn't see much meanness or bullying going on. Everyone was pretty friendly! But I also went to a high school in the country. My middle school was in the city and very, very different.
bananas / 9899 posts
Eh, maybe somewhat. There were definitely popular kids and unpopular ones. The popular boys tended to be sporty while the popular girls tended to wear expensive clothing.
I was somewhere in between. I wasn't popular, but I wasn't bullied or teased much. I was a weird kid and I always dressed strangely, so I got some comments for that. Honestly I never cared what people thought about my clothes. I would have been much more hurt if they insulted my actual appearance or intelligence, but no one ever did really.
Overall I don't think people were that nasty. We were a pretty small school, and in general nothing that bad happened.
pineapple / 12234 posts
Yes! My high school was very stereotypical. Mostly everyone was very privileged and that just made it so much worse.
coconut / 8861 posts
I had a great high school experience. Everyone just knew each other from all grades. I went to an all girls Catholic school. I had a solid group of friends and knew others from other groups of sorts, but we got along, no Mean Girls stuff here. I'll never forget the outpouring of love and support when we lost a classmate to a terminal illness in my class senior year.
Last week, a classmate and her husband were killed in a car crash leaving behind two young children. Over the past few days, I've watched my high school and their college alma mater mobilize support in so many ways. Seeing this makes me happy for the wonderful high school I attended and how they support everyone in tangible and intangible ways.
honeydew / 7504 posts
@HLK208: This, too. My high school was the "richest" in the area, and in talking to kids from other schools, it definitely seemed like our cliques and related drama was much more prevalent. Plus, the other schools hated us.
pomegranate / 3314 posts
I went to a pretty friendly, small Catholic high school and I really enjoyed it! There will still cliques, but said cliques tended to be pretty friendly with each other - and I managed to get along with most everyone. I actually miss those days sometimes.
pomelo / 5678 posts
I didn't. I had to go to this really small town like 20 miles away and it was super odd. There weren't really groups, more like 1 big group. We lived a lot of different places and I much preferred a larger school.
It was boring, unchallenging, and most people were related and everyone was from there - even the teachers. I got a crap education.
coconut / 8234 posts
I loved my high school experience. We didn't have any sports teams (only gym & intramurals) so there were no jocks, no mean girls, no cheer leaders, etc. Of course we had lots of cliques, but there were so many and they overlapped with others. Our HS was like college in that we could pick classes, we had open periods where kids would just be sitting in the halls chillaxing. There was so much diversity (even though it still could be somewhat segregated) but it was pretty cool. I love my high school. And my school was on an episode of Seinfeld
wonderful pear / 26210 posts
If I had to sum it up in one word, I would choose "uninteresting." I had one goal in high school, to go to college in Boston. All my attention was focused on it.
I wasn't popular, but I had friends. I am still friends with some of them, 20 years after graduation...yes I am THAT old.
kiwi / 568 posts
I didn't enjoy my HS experience. Mostly because I was the new kid, extremely shy, and my awkward phase lasted a lot longer than most. There were cliques and I was an outsider. Looking back and attending the reunions, I'm glad that I wasn't a part of the cool group, because they really did end up "messed up"
pomegranate / 3791 posts
My best friend from high school has said, "If they had made Wonderstruck's high school experience into a movie, you would say that it was way too crazy and far fetched, and that stuff like that doesn't happen in real life." I was in a few different groups, but there was a mean girls clique that zoned in on me for whatever reason and basically set out to make my life a living hell - after lots of sneaky bullying as only girls can do (and those stories are so freaking insane,) along with some physical attacks when teachers weren't looking, it finally ended up being taken to the police after they started stalking me as I walked home and trying to run me over with their car. Seriously.
Luckily all those girls had dropped out or been sent to the 'alternative' high school by 11th grade, so the last couple of years were awesome. It also made a big difference that I was super involved in marching band, which was huge at our high school - we were like one big family and there were people in it from all different groups and cliques, so that was bonding.
bananas / 9227 posts
The beginning of HS was definitely a popularity contest. But it wasn't as bad at Jr. High. That was like an after school special filled with all the cliche cliques and stereotypes! My parents moved in the middle of the school year, so I was the "new kid". Somehow I ended up living next to the "cool girls" and looking back, my middle school years was dominated by different hairstyles and pictures where I'm wearing way too much make-up for my age!
By the end of high school, I couldn't care less about popularity and just wanted to get it over with. I saw one of my good friends become addicted to drugs (which she only started to keep her already skinny figure)! Yeh, that sucked. But other people around us didn't know what was going on.
Jr. High School was fun. High school, I didn't care much about, unfortunately.
kiwi / 545 posts
DH and I went to the same HS and graduated in the same class. Our school was an urban inner-city school that bused in kids from wealthier neighborhoods that also had a performing arts magnet program (now their own school). I was a dance major for the first two years. I couldn't relate to the Disney-esque stereotypes that are portrayed on TV and movies. Smart kids were popular, drama kids were, too. We had gangs and we had goth people all mingled together. One night DH would be at house party in the projects and the next night he'd be at one in a multi-million dollar home.
Anyway, I HATED high school - I was so awkward and so shy. I couldn't wait to get the hell out of there. It was my own insecurities. Surprisingly, DH - who was ridiculously popular - also hated it but for other reasons. Pretty sure our classmates have scratched their heads wondering how we got together
cantaloupe / 6164 posts
I graduated from a private Christian high school & my graduated class was like 54 people, so everyone was pretty nice to each other. There were definitely groups of friends, but everyone got along. It was really nice, and the main reason I want Sadie in private school.
pomelo / 5678 posts
@mrsjazz: that sounds great! Any place without sports...
pear / 1672 posts
I had a very atypical high school experience, at least to me anyway. I went to small (my graduating class was 30 people), private all-girls school that has/had a high population of well off students, including children of celebrities. Actually the show Gossip Girl was based on my school. Gossip Girl is completely over the top, but for some people partially accurate. It wasn't that way for me at all since I was the working class minority kid from the outer boroughs with a strict mother. I didn't enjoy my experience socially even though I did well and was heavily involved with extracurricular activities. There were no groups based on what you did or liked, just groups of friends. These groups weren't always nice to each other though.
I'm always fascinated by the portrayals of high school on TV, especially with cheerleaders, football players and kids who drove cars to school.
honeydew / 7091 posts
@BKCaribBaby: Hah - GG was one of the ridiculous HS shows that popped in my head. That one and The OC. I can't imagine having that much freedom from my parents!
pear / 1672 posts
@swurlygurl: Yeah..totally over the top, but to some degree some people really did have that kind of life. I think there is always some degree of freedom that city kids have because they are not dependent on parents/older people to get you where you need to go. I was very focused, straight-laced and my mother was not having it, so I was not into running all over the city doing who knows what. I did have my fun though.
papaya / 10570 posts
School in the UK isn't really like it is in the US (or at least it wasn't when I went to school). There were no cheerleaders, for one, and no prom so no prom queen situation. In my class, there were the cool kids, the uncool kids ("the squares") and the really uncool kids (fat or really weird, usually). I was "square" because I got good grades and wore appropriate school uniform (eg didnt roll my skirt up or wear make up). I had friends but I was desperately awkward and longed to be accepted by the in-crowd. There were periods of minor bullying but mostly I just hung out with my friends, cringed every time a boy walked past me and hated myself with a passion.
pomegranate / 3032 posts
It was typical but atypical at the same time. I lived in a pretty wealthy town but we were solidly middle class. There were 4 elementary schools that fed into a middle school and 2 other towns middle schools that fed into our HS. Cliques were more based on the school you came from (and how wealthy your family was) and what sports you played. I had a great core of friends, lots of kids i was friendly with and I was friends with a lot of guys, but i never dated guys from my HS.
I was a freshman when colombine happened and our school was featured on an episode of 20/20 because a kid a few years older then me felt he was being bullied and actually wrote out a "plan". The whole story was edited in such a way that they framed a guy i was friends with as the "bully" when he wasnt at all.
GOLD / wonderful olive / 19030 posts
My high school experience was fine once I grew into myself. I went to a small school (graduated with 50 people) most of which we had known since kindergarten. I was picked on quite a bit but was part of the "cool" crowd. I was involved in a lot of extracurricular so I had a lot of friends from all different groups. My closest group of friends were the popular athletes who drank/partied on weekends (different from the popular athletes who were super religious & looked down on us.) Otherwise there were the band/choir/drama kids, the "druggies/slackers", the outsiders who all hung out together, the religious group, & the hicks/farmers. (haha this is NE we had a farmer/cowboy clique who chewed tobacco in class and took a lot of woodshop.)
clementine / 984 posts
@LuLu Mom: Haha, that sounds like my little IA experience, too. All sorts of cliques, and school was so small (I graduated in a class of 34) that you were in lots of groups and activities and your clique was really more of who was your friends group.
All the cheerleaders didn't hang out and drama kids weren't in their own little gang because it was likely that the cheerleader was in drama, speech, played the drums in the pep band, and was on homecoming court. There was still slight bullying, but in a school so small, it rarely escalated. It was awesome for some, meh for others, and I'm sure it was hell for a few folks, but I don't think it was TV-style typical HS.
GOLD / cantaloupe / 6581 posts
High school was better than middle school! Like @Mae: my school was weird in that it was the smart + hot people who were popular, not the jocks. My HS was very academic & arts focused, and the band geeks were cooler/more important than the jocks. I never really felt like I fit in, because my Asian friends had their clique, the smart/hotties had theirs, and I was just... awkward. I think a lot of people feel like that though!
eggplant / 11716 posts
@indi: @LuLu Mom: My HS experience was very similar! Except in a teensy, tiny, dusty west Texas town. haha.
Overall, HS was good to me, if a little bit boring. Small school, so the friend groups couldn't really be categorized at the "jocks" or "band nerds", because a lot of kids were in ALL the electives.
I was in band, and theater, and on the tennis team so I had several friend groups--but my bestiest were the smart kids.
I felt like my time there was transitory. Meaning, even then, I knew I wasn't the type to live there forever--and I was right! I moved when I started college and never lived there again. But still, it was nice and safe and uneventful which kind of good for a kid. I was exposed to too much, too soon.
watermelon / 14467 posts
High school was terrible for me. It was definitely your stereotypical high school experience. It didn't help that I moved to that school in tenth grade. Ugh. I hope I don't have to do that to my kids.
nectarine / 2465 posts
It was definitely clique-y, but I don't remember there being the stereotypical 'jocks/nerds/popular' group, it was pretty mixed. I also don't remember there being any 'mean girls,' maybe I just didn't care?
coconut / 8279 posts
I didn't "belong" to any group. I just had one best friend but we only had one class together. People would make up stories about us, egged my house, smashed my dad's car windshield, stole my best friend's expensive guitar. We were targeted because we didn't belong to any group.
My parents took me out of school senior year but the damage was done.