Without getting too much into the story: my mom wants to call my ex to urge him into helping his mom. My mother has done all she can and more for my ex-mil and feels completely sorry for her because he has cut all ties with her.

She's in desperate financial need and by now, he should be in a position to help. He's an MD now and last I heard, got into the specialty he wanted (Orthopedic surgery) at a top medical center!

I haven't spoken to him since we divorced (he was still in med school then) and he hasn't spoken to my mom since we separated in 2003. He hasn't spoken to his mom since before even then ... basically he cut all ties with her because he wasn't getting enough money from her, although she was doing all she can!

I also feel completely bad for her, but I've moved on, have my own life, and plus, I live abroad so I don't hear much about anything anyway. Well, I'm a little cautious that if my mom were to hunt him down and call him, it would open up drama - even if I'm not involved in it, my mom is and I don't want to hear about it!

He's a horrible person that only does things if he benefits from them - I know this is the reason why he refuses to help his mom. I highly doubt he'll all the sudden change his mind just because my mother gives him an earfull!

Should I convince my mom to not contact him at all? Or should I just stay out of it and let her do what she wants? (If she were to call him, she's going to have to find all his contact info herself or get it from ex-mil because I'm in no way helping with any Google searches)!

I should add that since my mother is the only one helping her right now, she is directly affected with all this as well.